1
00:00:00,630 --> 00:00:02,200
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
2
00:00:05,460 --> 00:00:07,960
Mmm-mmm. What is this stuff?
3
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:09,830
Is there some sort of a law
4
00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:12,530
against serving anything
edible in this cafeteria?
5
00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:14,830
Ugh! Looks like another
6
00:00:14,900 --> 00:00:17,100
-potato chips and cake day.
-Ugh!
7
00:00:17,300 --> 00:00:20,460
I see you guys decided
to pass on the daily special.
8
00:00:20,700 --> 00:00:21,960
Do you mean the goulash surprise?
9
00:00:22,030 --> 00:00:25,460
Ugh! I don't like surprises.
Especially not goulash ones.
10
00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:26,560
[BOTH EXCLAIM]
11
00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:30,160
And, now, the ritualistic
dance known as table search.
12
00:00:30,460 --> 00:00:32,930
Don't try and sit
with the popular kids.
13
00:00:33,100 --> 00:00:34,400
They might rip your head off.
14
00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:38,900
Jocks, sure, if you like broken bones.
15
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,260
You sit at the loser table,
16
00:00:42,330 --> 00:00:44,400
you risk rejection
from the rest of the herd.
17
00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:50,200
Gordo, lunch is horrifying
enough without recording it.
18
00:00:50,330 --> 00:00:51,500
Of course, lunch is horrible.
19
00:00:51,930 --> 00:00:54,100
No one ever said
that middle school would be easy.
20
00:00:54,660 --> 00:00:56,260
Somebody tell that to Kate.
21
00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:57,760
GORDO: Look, how many times
do I have to tell you,
22
00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:01,130
that one day Kate's life
will be meaningless and miserable.
23
00:01:04,630 --> 00:01:06,500
It's just so hard to wait.
24
00:01:06,860 --> 00:01:09,230
Ooh! How did I not see that coming.
25
00:01:09,460 --> 00:01:11,500
[THEME SONG PLAYING]
26
00:01:53,030 --> 00:01:54,960
Wait, where's my camera?
27
00:01:55,430 --> 00:01:56,660
You must've left it in the cafeteria.
28
00:01:56,730 --> 00:01:59,100
Okay, wait here.
I'll go back and see if it's there.
29
00:01:59,930 --> 00:02:01,160
You think he'll find it?
30
00:02:01,230 --> 00:02:03,300
If he doesn't, we'll be having it
for lunch tomorrow.
31
00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:05,700
[SCOFFS] Remember
the time I lost my bracelet?
32
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:08,160
Oh! And I had it
in my Mac and Cheese the next day!
33
00:02:08,430 --> 00:02:09,430
BOTH: Gross!
34
00:02:09,660 --> 00:02:11,360
It was on the whole time.
35
00:02:11,730 --> 00:02:13,630
You guys will never believe
what I got on tape.
36
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:15,160
-Elvis?
-Big Foot?
37
00:02:15,330 --> 00:02:16,900
Close. Kate.
38
00:02:17,330 --> 00:02:18,360
Cool!
39
00:02:19,430 --> 00:02:21,460
Okay! Promise you won't tell anyone.
40
00:02:21,530 --> 00:02:23,200
Sure! What is it?
41
00:02:24,830 --> 00:02:26,500
[SOFTLY] I'm a year
older than everybody.
42
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:27,730
-[SCOFFS]
-CLAIRE: You're 14?
43
00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:28,800
KATE: Yeah.
44
00:02:29,030 --> 00:02:30,400
-[LAUGHING]
-CLAIRE: You're in seventh grade.
45
00:02:30,730 --> 00:02:32,660
Remember you promised
not to tell anyone.
46
00:02:33,230 --> 00:02:34,530
You mean, you got held back?
47
00:02:34,700 --> 00:02:36,900
-It was only in kindergarten.
-[GASPS]
48
00:02:37,100 --> 00:02:40,060
CLAIRE: Uh, I mean,
I guess it's not that bad. Right?
49
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:43,000
I've been hiding
this ever since elementary school.
50
00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:45,830
If anybody finds out I'm
a year older than everybody else,
51
00:02:45,900 --> 00:02:48,560
my whole image will be totally ruined.
52
00:02:50,860 --> 00:02:53,530
I cannot believe that Kate
was held back in kindergarten.
53
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,830
What'd she do? Fail nap time?
54
00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,000
[YAWNS]
55
00:02:57,660 --> 00:03:00,630
Prepare your speech, Gordo.
This is your Oscar winner.
56
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:01,700
-LIZZIE: Mmm-hmm!
-Yeah.
57
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:02,760
I can't believe it.
58
00:03:02,830 --> 00:03:06,060
I-I finally get something good
and it's completely by accident.
59
00:03:06,860 --> 00:03:07,860
Wait?
60
00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:10,860
Maybe I can get some more of this.
61
00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:11,960
What do you mean?
62
00:03:12,060 --> 00:03:13,500
Uh, more of this hidden camera stuff.
63
00:03:14,030 --> 00:03:15,660
This has incredible potential.
64
00:03:16,130 --> 00:03:17,130
[SCOFFS]
65
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:18,460
Come on, we're gonna be late.
66
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,960
Hey, Dad.
Would you run me over with a car?
67
00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:24,200
Sure, in a minute, Son.
68
00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:25,560
Sam?
69
00:03:25,630 --> 00:03:27,200
-What? What'd I do?
-[SCOFFS]
70
00:03:27,430 --> 00:03:29,000
Mom, chill. It's for school.
71
00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:32,630
Oh, I am so looking forward
to hear you explain this.
72
00:03:32,830 --> 00:03:36,230
Mom, Mom, Mom,
Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom.
73
00:03:36,700 --> 00:03:40,000
Haven't you ever heard of career day?
74
00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,500
What kind of career is this,
insurance fraud?
75
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:45,200
No! Stuntman.
76
00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:46,360
Cool!
77
00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:49,260
No? Not cool, very not cool.
78
00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:51,860
Why can't you be a doctor or a lawyer?
79
00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:54,860
That would require
years of schooling.
80
00:03:55,100 --> 00:03:56,560
This, I can do right now.
81
00:03:57,630 --> 00:04:00,760
Matt, we are not running
you over with a car.
82
00:04:01,060 --> 00:04:02,060
Fine.
83
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:03,430
I'll come up with something else.
84
00:04:08,360 --> 00:04:10,400
[INAUDIBLE]
85
00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,160
Okay, uh, let's see what we got.
86
00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:10,930
[CHUCKLES]
87
00:05:13,100 --> 00:05:14,160
Ew!
88
00:05:15,730 --> 00:05:16,730
MIRANDA: Ew!
89
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:19,800
Okay, you really want
to know my secret?
90
00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:21,030
Yeah!
91
00:05:21,260 --> 00:05:22,260
I'll tell you.
92
00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:28,560
Here, pet it.
93
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:30,530
[LAUGHING]
94
00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:32,830
Just pet the bunny.
95
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:34,600
I tell you,
96
00:05:34,660 --> 00:05:36,260
I do it every time before a game.
97
00:05:37,060 --> 00:05:38,330
It'll bring you luck.
98
00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:39,800
[LAUGHING]
99
00:05:42,630 --> 00:05:44,100
[GIRL SLURPING LOUDLY]
100
00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:46,560
[BURPING LOUDLY]
101
00:05:48,060 --> 00:05:49,530
-[CHUCKLES]
-[BURPS]
102
00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:52,930
Gordo, that was great!
103
00:05:53,230 --> 00:05:54,400
Do you realize what you have here?
104
00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:55,960
I mean, do you even
know what would happen
105
00:05:56,030 --> 00:05:58,100
if other people
in school saw this stuff?
106
00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:00,260
Yeah, they'd know
what I've always known.
107
00:06:00,460 --> 00:06:02,830
That even the popular kids
have stuff to be embarrassed about.
108
00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:06,030
Well, you've got to figure out
a way to get everyone to see this.
109
00:06:17,330 --> 00:06:19,160
-Matt?
-MATT: Yes?
110
00:06:19,460 --> 00:06:20,730
Come down here, right now.
111
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:22,830
MATT: As soon as I open up
the umbrella, Dad.
112
00:06:22,900 --> 00:06:24,660
No, Son, you're gonna use the ladder.
113
00:06:24,730 --> 00:06:25,960
MATT: Aw, man.
114
00:06:26,030 --> 00:06:27,430
Come on, give me the umbrella.
115
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:30,930
I can't believe it.
116
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,530
These things never work.
Trust me, I know.
117
00:06:33,900 --> 00:06:35,830
What about sheets for a parachute?
118
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,930
Even worse.
Gets wrapped around your face.
119
00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:39,660
Oh.
120
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,330
Look, look, this is it.
121
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:51,130
I know exactly
where my film's gonna show.
122
00:06:51,860 --> 00:06:55,730
"Unified School District 41
Student Film Competition?"
123
00:06:56,060 --> 00:06:57,330
Where did you get this?
124
00:06:57,460 --> 00:06:58,460
Off the bulletin board.
125
00:06:58,630 --> 00:07:00,800
[SNICKERS] You read
the bulletin board?
126
00:07:01,260 --> 00:07:02,660
We have a bulletin board?
127
00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,930
I think I have the ultimate real
life documentary about middle school.
128
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:10,400
You're a lock, Gordo.
Uh, your film's gonna be great.
129
00:07:11,460 --> 00:07:14,160
So, where is this so-called
bulletin board?
130
00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:17,130
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
131
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:21,400
Move it!
132
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,000
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
133
00:07:25,130 --> 00:07:26,460
Where's your lunch?
134
00:07:26,660 --> 00:07:30,030
To have lunch, you need money,
which I left in my backpack,
135
00:07:30,130 --> 00:07:31,960
which I left on the bus this morning
136
00:07:32,030 --> 00:07:33,800
along with my third period
book report,
137
00:07:33,930 --> 00:07:36,460
my clean gym clothes,
someone put gum my locker,
138
00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:38,500
and to top it all off,
139
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:41,300
I just found out
that Larry Tudgeman uses my picture
140
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,700
as a screen saver on his computer!
141
00:07:50,230 --> 00:07:52,800
Well, want some of my French Fries?
142
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:54,660
Why don't they just slap
a big sign on this school
143
00:07:54,730 --> 00:07:57,060
that says "Loser Farm"
and be done with it?
144
00:07:57,260 --> 00:07:58,830
You're having a really bad day.
145
00:07:59,100 --> 00:08:00,530
But school isn't that bad.
146
00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:02,300
[SIGHS] You're right.
147
00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:03,500
It's not that bad.
148
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:05,230
It's terrible!
149
00:08:05,300 --> 00:08:08,430
I mean, everyone looks up
to the jocks and the cheerleaders.
150
00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:09,900
We're a bunch of stuck up dorks,
151
00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,630
we're gonna end up working
at the drive-through at Burger Buddy.
152
00:08:13,100 --> 00:08:14,960
Okay, vent.
153
00:08:15,530 --> 00:08:16,930
I-It's this whole place.
154
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,600
I mean, it's the way that people
say one thing to your face
155
00:08:19,660 --> 00:08:21,400
and another behind your back.
156
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:41,200
Matt, don't use your mother's
panty hose for bungee jumping.
157
00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:47,030
MATT: Hey, Dad.
158
00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:48,600
Do we have a blowtorch?
159
00:08:48,660 --> 00:08:50,830
Son, you're not jumping
through a ring of fire.
160
00:08:51,100 --> 00:08:52,300
[GROANS]
161
00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:54,400
[LEAF BLOWER WHIRRING]
162
00:08:56,760 --> 00:08:59,860
Son, don't use my leaf blower
as a jetpack.
163
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:01,860
How do you expect me
to be a stuntman?
164
00:09:01,930 --> 00:09:03,760
You won't let me do anything.
165
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,060
Find something else to be, Matt.
166
00:09:06,530 --> 00:09:08,400
Fine, squash my dreams.
167
00:09:08,630 --> 00:09:10,430
I'll come up with something else!
168
00:09:14,260 --> 00:09:16,500
I'm hoping for another
big Kate revelation.
169
00:09:16,930 --> 00:09:19,560
I don't know, I'm a big fan
of the "pet the bunny" boy.
170
00:09:19,630 --> 00:09:21,860
Hmm. Today's digital dynamite is...
171
00:09:22,260 --> 00:09:24,060
Why don't they just slap
a big sign on this school
172
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:26,230
that says "Loser Farm"
and be done with it?
173
00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:27,300
You're having a really bad day.
174
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:28,660
- But school isn't that bad.
-Uh, that's Miranda, Gordo.
175
00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:31,330
-Yeah, it is.
-You taped me?
176
00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:32,560
LIZZIE: Okay, vent.
177
00:09:32,630 --> 00:09:35,630
I'd love to stick around,
but I got a thing. Ow!
178
00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:37,600
It's terrible...
179
00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:39,360
All I did was tape the quad.
180
00:09:39,560 --> 00:09:41,130
I didn't know you were gonna be there.
181
00:09:41,260 --> 00:09:43,700
I mean, it's okay, it's no big deal.
Your hair looks fab.
182
00:09:43,860 --> 00:09:45,130
You're taking his side.
183
00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:48,030
I mean, who died and made
you Big Brother anyway?
184
00:09:48,230 --> 00:09:50,100
You were happy to watch it
when it was other people.
185
00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:51,330
Well, it's no big deal.
186
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:52,860
It's not like he's gonna
use this stuff.
187
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:54,430
Of course I am, why wouldn't I?
188
00:09:54,560 --> 00:09:58,130
Because if anyone from school sees me
on that tape, I'm toast.
189
00:09:59,560 --> 00:10:00,560
Incoming!
190
00:10:03,030 --> 00:10:05,700
I think you worry a little too much
about what other people think.
191
00:10:06,060 --> 00:10:07,860
Not everyone is like you.
192
00:10:08,130 --> 00:10:10,430
Some of us care
what other people think.
193
00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:11,500
[HUFFS]
194
00:10:12,760 --> 00:10:15,430
Okay. If you ask me,
she's being a little hypocritical.
195
00:10:15,530 --> 00:10:16,530
Come on, Gordo.
196
00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:18,430
You know if anyone
at school sees that tape,
197
00:10:18,500 --> 00:10:20,700
she could never show
her face in school again.
198
00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:23,760
That's ridiculous.
People are gonna love this.
199
00:10:24,300 --> 00:10:25,760
You're on my side, aren't you?
200
00:10:26,230 --> 00:10:27,230
[SCOFFS]
201
00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:31,230
Why do we have drills
for fire and earthquakes,
202
00:10:31,300 --> 00:10:34,460
but nothing for when your two best
friends declare war on each other?
203
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:40,160
Oh, good. You're here.
204
00:10:42,330 --> 00:10:45,430
You're always so punctual,
and your hair looks incredible.
205
00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:47,530
Are those new earrings?
206
00:10:47,630 --> 00:10:50,430
No! You gave 'em to me
last year for my birthday.
207
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:52,400
What's wrong with you?
208
00:10:53,230 --> 00:10:54,230
You better sit down.
209
00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,160
Lizzie, look at me.
210
00:10:57,030 --> 00:10:58,300
I am sitting down.
211
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:00,860
Right! [CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
212
00:11:00,930 --> 00:11:04,700
Um, well, I thought I should
be the first one to tell you,
213
00:11:04,830 --> 00:11:07,830
that Gordo's one of the finalist
in the film competition.
214
00:11:08,130 --> 00:11:09,130
Oh, no!
215
00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,300
Have you seen the film,
how bad was I?
216
00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:12,960
Do I need to transfer schools?
217
00:11:13,030 --> 00:11:14,030
I haven't seen it yet.
218
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:15,530
I didn't even mean that stuff.
219
00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:17,230
I was just having a bad day.
220
00:11:17,300 --> 00:11:18,930
Now, all the school district officials
221
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,500
are gonna see me ragging
on our school.
222
00:11:22,530 --> 00:11:25,760
Actually, the whole school district
is going to see you.
223
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:28,530
They're showing all three final films
at the big assembly.
224
00:11:28,660 --> 00:11:30,400
[CHUCKLING] I'm dead.
225
00:11:30,930 --> 00:11:32,900
I'm the late Miranda Sanchez.
226
00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:34,700
[SIGHS]
227
00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,430
[CLEARS THROAT]
What're you doing, sweetheart?
228
00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:47,760
Cooking.
229
00:11:47,860 --> 00:11:50,560
See, this is good.
No more of that stuntman stuff.
230
00:11:50,830 --> 00:11:52,230
He's gonna be a chef.
231
00:11:54,830 --> 00:11:56,260
Hey, he can have his own restaurant.
232
00:11:56,330 --> 00:11:57,900
He can have his own cooking show. Bam!
233
00:11:57,960 --> 00:11:58,960
[CHUCKLES]
234
00:12:00,300 --> 00:12:02,060
Good, we can go
to his house for Thanksgiving.
235
00:12:02,130 --> 00:12:03,130
Our son, the chef.
236
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:06,830
[SOFTLY] Don't tell him we like it.
He'll stop doing it.
237
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:10,300
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]
238
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:11,900
So the screening's sixth period,
239
00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:13,860
but all finalists have
to be there by lunch.
240
00:12:13,930 --> 00:12:16,000
Okay, so you still have some left.
241
00:12:16,060 --> 00:12:18,860
Is there any way that
you can cut out Miranda's part?
242
00:12:18,930 --> 00:12:20,900
You have so much other great footage.
243
00:12:21,230 --> 00:12:24,760
Yeah, but the stuff with Miranda
sort of ties it all together.
244
00:12:25,260 --> 00:12:29,230
Maybe it's tying his film together,
but it's pulling me apart.
245
00:12:29,700 --> 00:12:32,330
Hey, dude, I heard about your film.
Where's it playing?
246
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:34,100
Uh, in the AV room, sixth period.
247
00:12:34,730 --> 00:12:36,360
Oh, so it's not a real movie.
248
00:12:36,900 --> 00:12:40,430
Yeah, Ethan. I just made
a $35 million action movie
249
00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:42,100
and they're showing
it at the assembly.
250
00:12:42,700 --> 00:12:44,500
Hey, way to go, Gordo. I'll be there.
251
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,800
Gordo, I mean, I really don't
think you should do this!
252
00:12:47,860 --> 00:12:48,900
Hey, Gordo.
253
00:12:49,260 --> 00:12:50,800
Are we going to be in your movie?
254
00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:53,230
How could he do a movie
about our school without us?
255
00:12:53,730 --> 00:12:55,200
You don't know how true that is.
256
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:57,760
Well, good luck.
I'm sure it's gonna be great.
257
00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,930
Thanks, I'll, uh,
see you guys at the screening.
258
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:01,030
Gordo, I...
259
00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:02,630
Look, Lizzie. I gotta go.
260
00:13:02,700 --> 00:13:03,700
But, do me a favor,
261
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,300
watch the movie before you tell me
what I should or should not do.
262
00:13:07,900 --> 00:13:08,830
[SCOFFS]
263
00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:12,160
Great, everyone
in school is talking about this film
264
00:13:12,230 --> 00:13:13,900
and how they're going to see it.
265
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,260
Gordo caught me on one bad day
266
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,900
and now the whole school
is gonna think I'm a total loser.
267
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,160
Maybe not.
Maybe it's not as bad as we think.
268
00:13:21,230 --> 00:13:23,700
Gordo says that we should see
it before we make up our minds.
269
00:13:23,860 --> 00:13:25,930
I can't believe it!
You're taking Gordo's side?
270
00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:27,200
I'm not taking anybody's side.
271
00:13:27,260 --> 00:13:29,860
Well, you should be!
You should be taking my side!
272
00:13:30,230 --> 00:13:32,230
Okay, you can stop now.
273
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:34,400
I can't stretch this far.
274
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:38,030
Come on, Miranda, you know
that this is a big deal for Gordo!
275
00:13:38,100 --> 00:13:39,930
And it's a big moment for me!
276
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:43,860
It's the moment where my fate
is sealed as a social outcast.
277
00:13:44,960 --> 00:13:45,960
[SCOFFS]
278
00:13:55,530 --> 00:13:56,560
Matt?
279
00:13:58,560 --> 00:13:59,560
What're you doing?
280
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:00,960
What's it look like I'm doing?
281
00:14:01,030 --> 00:14:04,000
I'm setting up my mile-of-death
ultimate torture track.
282
00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:07,360
Where did you get all the wood?
283
00:14:10,230 --> 00:14:11,630
What happened to the cooking?
284
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:15,160
I was cooking the candy to make
the fake glass to crash through.
285
00:14:17,630 --> 00:14:20,660
Uh, honey, I thought we agreed
that you weren't gonna be a stuntman.
286
00:14:20,900 --> 00:14:22,030
I'm not going to.
287
00:14:23,300 --> 00:14:25,800
I'm going to be a daredevil.
288
00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:27,600
Ah!
289
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:29,830
Sam!
290
00:14:30,060 --> 00:14:32,930
SAM: I'm a bit busy, hon.
I'm ironing my pants.
291
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,560
Well, guess it's time for a test run.
292
00:14:36,660 --> 00:14:39,060
Sam, you get out here and I mean now!
293
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:46,500
[SCREAMING]
294
00:15:13,730 --> 00:15:16,260
[SCREAMS]
295
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:23,030
[GROANS]
296
00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:24,100
Wow!
297
00:15:24,830 --> 00:15:26,900
That's gotta hurt.
298
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:28,400
Yeah.
299
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:32,500
Okay, maybe I don't
want to be a daredevil.
300
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:35,800
How about a rockstar?
301
00:15:36,330 --> 00:15:38,300
[PLAYS AIR GUITAR]
302
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:44,130
Can't believe it,
my debut as a director
303
00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:46,560
and here I am
not wearing a baseball hat.
304
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,060
Baseball bat, yeah, mmm-hmm.
305
00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,630
Baseball hat. You okay?
306
00:15:53,230 --> 00:15:54,760
Actually, no!
307
00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:56,760
I... I'll be right back.
308
00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:57,900
You're gonna miss my movie.
309
00:15:58,630 --> 00:15:59,760
I won't, I promise.
310
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:08,000
Hey!
311
00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:09,700
Hey.
312
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,530
Why aren't you
in there with Spielberg?
313
00:16:12,300 --> 00:16:13,900
'Cause I wanted
to make sure that you were okay.
314
00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:15,660
I'm fine, really. I mean,
315
00:16:15,730 --> 00:16:18,060
that's why I'm hiding
from the entire school.
316
00:16:18,860 --> 00:16:20,030
Time to go in, girls.
317
00:16:21,060 --> 00:16:22,060
[SIGHS]
318
00:16:22,130 --> 00:16:23,130
This is it.
319
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,200
When I come out of there...
320
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,130
I'll have no friends.
321
00:16:27,330 --> 00:16:28,460
Yes, you will!
322
00:16:28,630 --> 00:16:29,700
You'll have me.
323
00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,500
Okay, everyone.
324
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,230
I think the moment
we've all been waiting for.
325
00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:42,930
No disrespect to the other
finalists from the other schools.
326
00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:45,530
[BOOING]
327
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,430
Now, now, now.
328
00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:49,660
Stop. Let's be nice to our guests.
329
00:16:49,900 --> 00:16:52,460
[BOOING]
330
00:16:52,860 --> 00:16:54,160
Okay, that's enough!
331
00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:56,860
Now, without further ado,
332
00:16:57,430 --> 00:16:58,660
The Gordo Files
333
00:16:59,130 --> 00:17:01,100
by David Gordon.
334
00:17:01,430 --> 00:17:03,000
[APPLAUSE]
335
00:17:08,600 --> 00:17:10,000
BOY 1: [DISTORTED VOICE]
You really want to know my secret?
336
00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,260
-BOY 2: Yeah.
-BOY 1: I'll tell you.
337
00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:14,130
Here, pet it.
338
00:17:14,830 --> 00:17:16,060
[ALL LAUGHING]
339
00:17:16,260 --> 00:17:17,830
BOY 1: Just pet the bunny.
340
00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:20,730
I tell you,
I do it every time before a game.
341
00:17:21,430 --> 00:17:22,800
It'll bring you luck.
342
00:17:31,030 --> 00:17:32,430
[BURPING]
343
00:17:32,860 --> 00:17:35,030
[ALL LAUGHING]
344
00:17:40,830 --> 00:17:42,430
MIRANDA: [DISTORTED]
Why don't they just slap a big sign
345
00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:45,400
on this school that
says "Loser Farm" and be done with it?
346
00:17:46,260 --> 00:17:48,860
Everyone looks up
to the jocks and the cheerleaders.
347
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,330
We're a bunch of stuck up dorks,
we're gonna end up working
348
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:53,200
at the drive-through at Burger Buddy.
349
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,160
It is this whole place.
350
00:17:55,230 --> 00:17:57,760
I mean, it's the way that people
say one thing to your face
351
00:17:58,530 --> 00:17:59,960
- and another behind your back.
- Hey, look.
352
00:18:00,460 --> 00:18:01,860
LIZZIE: He just used your voice.
353
00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:03,900
[INAUDIBLE]
354
00:18:04,100 --> 00:18:07,230
It's the way the cafeteria serves
you retired circus animals.
355
00:18:07,300 --> 00:18:10,660
[STUDENTS GRUNT DISGUSTEDLY]
356
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:16,800
[LAUGHING]
357
00:18:26,830 --> 00:18:28,760
Uh, how did Gordo
disguise my voice? I mean,
358
00:18:28,830 --> 00:18:30,700
it doesn't even sound like me.
359
00:18:30,830 --> 00:18:31,930
MIRANDA: [DISTORTED VOICE OVER]
I just get the feeling that
360
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,400
nobody's being honest here,
361
00:18:33,460 --> 00:18:34,660
that everybody's afraid
362
00:18:34,730 --> 00:18:37,260
to let everybody else know
the truth about them.
363
00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:39,560
KATE: [DISTORTED] Okay,
promise you won't tell anyone.
364
00:18:39,730 --> 00:18:41,400
CLAIRE: [DISTORTED]
Sure! What is it?
365
00:18:41,660 --> 00:18:43,260
KATE: Uh, I'm a year older
than everybody.
366
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:45,060
-CLAIRE: You're fourteen?
-KATE: Yeah.
367
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,600
KATE'S FRIEND:
But you're in seventh grade.
368
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:49,630
KATE: Remember,
you promised not to tell anyone.
369
00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:51,630
CLAIRE:
You mean, you got held back?
370
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,230
KATE: It was only in kindergarten.
371
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,960
CLAIRE: I guess
it's not that bad, right?
372
00:18:56,630 --> 00:18:58,760
KATE: I've been hiding this ever
since elementary school.
373
00:18:58,830 --> 00:19:01,630
If anybody finds out I'm a year older
than everybody else,
374
00:19:01,830 --> 00:19:04,560
my whole image will be totally ruined.
375
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:06,500
MIRANDA: [DISTORTED VOICE OVER]
Let's face it.
376
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:08,030
It's a school full of fakes.
377
00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,300
But, it's not so bad as long
as you've got really great friends.
378
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,760
[ALL WHOOPING AND CHEERING]
379
00:19:24,660 --> 00:19:26,630
Hey, dude, very cool.
380
00:19:26,700 --> 00:19:29,400
But, for 35 million,
couldn't you have blown some stuff up?
381
00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:32,460
Hey, you can't blame me!
I didn't know we were being taped!
382
00:19:32,700 --> 00:19:35,400
A, you'll never eat lunch
at this school again.
383
00:19:35,460 --> 00:19:37,300
B, whose voice was that?
384
00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:40,530
I'm sorry, Kate. I can't reveal that.
385
00:19:40,900 --> 00:19:42,230
It's a director's prerogative
386
00:19:42,300 --> 00:19:44,600
to keep his sources
and his techniques confidential.
387
00:19:45,330 --> 00:19:46,530
-What a dirk.
-[SCOFFS]
388
00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:50,260
So, Miranda, you never
told me what you thought of it.
389
00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:53,300
Well, I know it was supposed
to be a big surprise and all,
390
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,130
but you could've at least told me
391
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,530
so I'd stop stressing
and get some sleep.
392
00:19:57,860 --> 00:19:59,660
Miranda, I'm your friend.
393
00:19:59,730 --> 00:20:01,700
You should know
that I've always got your back.
394
00:20:02,630 --> 00:20:04,200
Next time, Gordo, remind me.
395
00:20:04,530 --> 00:20:05,560
I will.
396
00:20:05,730 --> 00:20:06,830
So, we're cool?
397
00:20:08,300 --> 00:20:09,430
Yeah, we're cool.
398
00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:11,730
Told her?
399
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:13,760
Why couldn't someone have told me?
400
00:20:14,330 --> 00:20:17,860
And, Gordo, please tell me
your days of hidden camera are over.
401
00:20:17,930 --> 00:20:20,030
They are, it's gotten old school.
402
00:20:20,100 --> 00:20:22,530
I'm looking for the next big thing.
403
00:20:24,860 --> 00:20:26,130
[CHUCKLING]
404
00:20:27,530 --> 00:20:30,430
I got it! It's a movie
about an animated character.
405
00:20:30,900 --> 00:20:34,430
She's smart, she's funny and Brad Pitt
is totally in love with her.
406
00:20:34,530 --> 00:20:35,560
DIRECTOR: It's a wrap!
407
00:20:36,930 --> 00:20:38,260
Guys?
408
00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:40,160
Guys, I'm not done yet.
409
00:20:41,230 --> 00:20:43,130
LIZZIE: Guys? Guys!
410
00:20:46,430 --> 00:20:47,500
JACK: Mark.
411
00:20:48,460 --> 00:20:51,060
It's the way that people
say one thing to your face
412
00:20:51,130 --> 00:20:52,900
and another behind your back.
413
00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:55,500
DIRECTOR: And, cut.
414
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,260
-Will you stop smiling?
-[CHUCKLING]
415
00:20:57,360 --> 00:20:58,360
-FEMALE CREW MEMBER: That's a cut.
-MALE CREW MEMBER: Yeah.
416
00:20:58,460 --> 00:20:59,730
Way to go, Gordo. I'll be there.
417
00:20:59,860 --> 00:21:01,330
Yeah, Ethan. I, uh...
418
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:03,330
Wha... What the?
419
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:04,400
HILARY: Gordo.
420
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:06,730
You're always so punctual.
421
00:21:06,900 --> 00:21:09,300
And, that...
Your hair looks okay... Ooh!
422
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:13,000
You're always so punctual.
And, that... [GRUNTS]
423
00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:14,700
[CHUCKLES]
424
00:21:15,130 --> 00:21:17,430
It's a movie about
an animated character.
425
00:21:17,500 --> 00:21:21,400
She's smart, she's funny and
Brad Pitt is totally in love with her.
426
00:21:24,060 --> 00:21:25,700
LALAINE: [CHUCKLES] Ah! Oh!
427
00:21:25,830 --> 00:21:26,830
[MUFFLED] That was great!
428
00:21:26,900 --> 00:21:28,300
[MUFFLED]
Yeah, we are pretty hungry.
429
00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:29,530
LIZZIE: That is so good!
430
00:21:29,700 --> 00:21:30,700
DIRECTOR: Okay, cut.
431
00:21:31,300 --> 00:21:33,300
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]