1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,000
[ALARM RINGING]

2
00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,400
Is there some sort of rule
that every time it's raining,

3
00:00:05,460 --> 00:00:07,300
we have to play dodgeball?

4
00:00:07,360 --> 00:00:09,360
Must be in the gym
teacher guide book.

5
00:00:13,060 --> 00:00:14,900
Jennie Woods has a great arm.

6
00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:17,930
She's like the Mike Tyson
of dodgeball.

7
00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:26,030
She didn't use to be that way.

8
00:00:26,130 --> 00:00:27,560
I mean, she plays the oboe.

9
00:00:27,630 --> 00:00:29,600
Oboe players aren't
supposed to be violent.

10
00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,330
It's the bra.

11
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:33,160
Ever since she
started wearing one

12
00:00:33,260 --> 00:00:35,330
she's become a whole new person.

13
00:00:35,530 --> 00:00:37,160
Kind of like someone else we know.

14
00:00:37,230 --> 00:00:38,860
-[CHANTING] Two, four, six, eight.
-LIZZIE: Claire and Kate...

15
00:00:38,930 --> 00:00:40,730
-Who's the girl we love to date.
-...get one and become popular.

16
00:00:40,930 --> 00:00:43,100
Jennie gets one
and becomes Brandi Chastain.

17
00:00:43,930 --> 00:00:46,700
If I had one,
I'd be Lizzie Warrior Princess.

18
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,630
Lizzie's got game.

19
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:50,560
It's not like she even needs one.

20
00:00:50,660 --> 00:00:52,760
I mean, we need one before Jennie does.

21
00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,300
So, why don't we have one?

22
00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:56,800
We should have one.

23
00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:00,160
You're right. We're 13.
It should be a rule.

24
00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:05,260
Ask your mom to give us
a ride to the mall after school.

25
00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:07,130
[SCOFFS] No way, you ask yours.

26
00:01:07,630 --> 00:01:09,230
I can't. She's working.

27
00:01:09,300 --> 00:01:10,930
Well, if we ask mine, she'll go with us.

28
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,430
So, how 'bout we tell her
we're shopping for

29
00:01:13,930 --> 00:01:14,930
school supplies.

30
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,700
Miranda, you know I'm not good at lying.

31
00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:17,760
Then I'll lie.

32
00:01:17,930 --> 00:01:19,130
She can just drop us off.

33
00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:21,600
I guess that'll work.

34
00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:24,330
A plan this simple has to work.

35
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:28,230
Ha! Ooh, should've seen
that one coming. [GROANS]

36
00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:30,130
[THEME SONG PLAYING]

37
00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:13,230
Lizzie, is that you?

38
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:15,200
-What do I say?
-[SCOFFS]

39
00:02:15,660 --> 00:02:18,060
Yeah, Mrs. McGuire, it's us.

40
00:02:18,900 --> 00:02:20,600
Not a word to your mom about the bra.

41
00:02:21,230 --> 00:02:23,700
We're going to the mall
for school supplies.

42
00:02:23,930 --> 00:02:25,200
Repeat after me,

43
00:02:25,700 --> 00:02:28,360
school supplies.

44
00:02:28,430 --> 00:02:30,860
-School supplies, school supplies.
-Okay.

45
00:02:30,930 --> 00:02:32,600
Hey, Mrs. McGuire.

46
00:02:33,260 --> 00:02:36,130
-Hi, Mom.
-Hey, girls. How was school?

47
00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:37,700
BOTH: Fine.

48
00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:40,660
So, what's up?

49
00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,200
BOTH: Nothing.

50
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:45,760
Uh, Lizzie, I have one more
load of laundry to do,

51
00:02:45,830 --> 00:02:48,360
and I was thinking I might throw
Mr. Snuggles in there

52
00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:50,360
because he's looking
a little bit dingy.

53
00:02:54,660 --> 00:02:55,730
Hello? Lizzie?

54
00:02:59,430 --> 00:03:02,600
Uh, I don't care what you
do with Mr. Snuggles.

55
00:03:02,930 --> 00:03:04,330
Stuffed animals are for babies.

56
00:03:04,460 --> 00:03:05,800
Give him to Matt.

57
00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:09,730
But, Mr. Snuggles,
you've had him since you were two.

58
00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:11,500
He's, like, your favorite toy.

59
00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:13,100
Was my favorite toy.

60
00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:14,830
I don't need toys anymore.

61
00:03:15,100 --> 00:03:16,400
I am an adult now.

62
00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:18,800
We are adults now.

63
00:03:19,930 --> 00:03:23,230
So, Mrs. McGuire, could
we have a ride to the mall?

64
00:03:23,630 --> 00:03:24,960
Oh, well, sure.

65
00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:26,430
What do you need?

66
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:27,660
School supplies.

67
00:03:29,260 --> 00:03:31,260
I'm a rock! I'll never crack.

68
00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:34,300
School supplies, okay. For what?

69
00:03:35,430 --> 00:03:36,430
School supplies.

70
00:03:37,060 --> 00:03:39,560
-Um, for a project.
-Mm.

71
00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:41,260
Okay.

72
00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:42,360
[PHONE RINGING]

73
00:03:43,460 --> 00:03:44,460
Hold that thought.

74
00:03:47,460 --> 00:03:49,700
-Hello?
-What was that?

75
00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:51,860
School supplies?

76
00:03:52,260 --> 00:03:53,860
Come on, let's go put
our books in your room

77
00:03:53,930 --> 00:03:56,230
before you totally spill your guts.

78
00:03:58,660 --> 00:04:00,130
See, I told you.

79
00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:05,200
Jet Li is looking for a new sidekick
for his newest movie.

80
00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:08,060
"The Untitled Jet Li Project."

81
00:04:08,430 --> 00:04:10,200
What a great title!

82
00:04:11,260 --> 00:04:12,600
Aren't you a little young for this?

83
00:04:12,660 --> 00:04:15,430
Says right here, "Ages ten and above."

84
00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:17,860
Honey, what do you think about this?

85
00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:25,660
"Your contest entry in the 'Jet Li Sidekick
Sweepstakes' can be a video,

86
00:04:25,730 --> 00:04:27,830
"an essay or even an audiotape."

87
00:04:29,260 --> 00:04:31,730
I think it's a terrible idea,
I don't want him doing this.

88
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:33,600
Listen, he's not going to win this,

89
00:04:33,660 --> 00:04:35,800
so we don't have to tell him no.
Someone else will.

90
00:04:36,230 --> 00:04:39,260
Meanwhile, we get the credit
for being really cool parents.

91
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,000
I think it's a great idea, honey.

92
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:42,600
[YELLING]

93
00:04:44,060 --> 00:04:45,200
Ow.

94
00:04:48,060 --> 00:04:50,000
Son? You okay?

95
00:04:50,660 --> 00:04:51,960
Son, listen.

96
00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:55,100
I think we're going to write the best essay
this magazine's ever seen.

97
00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:57,260
Essay? Well, you know,

98
00:04:57,600 --> 00:05:00,560
writing isn't my best subject.

99
00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:01,930
No worries, son.

100
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:04,960
You're sitting with the guy who won
a free trip to Washington, DC,

101
00:05:05,030 --> 00:05:08,400
in 1976 for his brilliant
Bicentennial essay,

102
00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:11,660
<i>"America, It's More Than Just</i>
<i>Amber Waves of Grain."</i>

103
00:05:13,930 --> 00:05:17,230
Mm-hmm. It's great, Dad, yeah. Great.

104
00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:18,460
[DOOR BELL RINGS]

105
00:05:18,730 --> 00:05:19,730
I'll get it.

106
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:22,160
Hey.

107
00:05:22,660 --> 00:05:24,730
[STUTTERS] You can't be here.
Wha...

108
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,160
And yet I am here.

109
00:05:26,330 --> 00:05:27,930
Your mom said we were going to the mall.

110
00:05:30,700 --> 00:05:31,700
[SQUEALS]

111
00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:33,530
Hi, Mrs. McGuire.

112
00:05:33,660 --> 00:05:34,700
Hey, Gordo.

113
00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:37,630
Hey, Mrs. McGuire, I called my mom.
She's cool with the mall thing.

114
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:40,330
Why are you here?

115
00:05:41,460 --> 00:05:42,500
I invited him.

116
00:05:42,630 --> 00:05:43,630
BOTH: When?

117
00:05:43,700 --> 00:05:44,730
When I just called?

118
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:48,230
I figured if you guys need school supplies
for a project, so does Gordo.

119
00:05:48,530 --> 00:05:51,630
Oh, no. Gordo doesn't
need any school supplies. Mm-mm.

120
00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:52,960
What school project?

121
00:05:53,230 --> 00:05:54,660
Uh, you're not in that class.

122
00:05:54,730 --> 00:05:57,260
But, I'm in all your classes,
except for gym.

123
00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:58,700
Well, then, that's it.

124
00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,560
It's a very secret,
special gym project

125
00:06:02,060 --> 00:06:04,400
that only me and Miranda
need to go shopping for.

126
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:06,030
Yeah.

127
00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:13,030
What's the project, Lizzie?

128
00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:15,000
-Uh, it's, um...
-I asked Lizzie.

129
00:06:16,700 --> 00:06:18,430
Oh! [STUTTERING] Wha...

130
00:06:18,500 --> 00:06:20,630
What do you need at the mall, Lizzie?

131
00:06:22,730 --> 00:06:24,530
I'd like to see a lawyer?

132
00:06:25,060 --> 00:06:26,060
Lizzie.

133
00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,360
[ECHOING] Tell me the truth.

134
00:06:31,830 --> 00:06:34,200
I want a bra! Okay?

135
00:06:34,260 --> 00:06:37,400
A bra! A bra! We want a bra!

136
00:06:37,660 --> 00:06:40,230
I want a [ECHOING] bra!

137
00:06:44,900 --> 00:06:47,730
Ew! That's disgusting!

138
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,200
Oh.

139
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,030
A bra? Isn't she kind of young for that?

140
00:06:53,230 --> 00:06:56,200
Absolutely not! And I should
have thought of this weeks ago.

141
00:06:56,260 --> 00:06:57,360
What was I thinking?

142
00:06:57,430 --> 00:06:59,560
I would be delighted
to take you girls shopping.

143
00:06:59,630 --> 00:07:00,960
Let me get my purse.

144
00:07:01,430 --> 00:07:03,630
Um, Mrs. McGuire?

145
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,860
Suddenly, I don't wanna go
to the mall with you guys anymore.

146
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:09,330
That's okay. You're uninvited.

147
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:13,600
[CHUCKLING]

148
00:07:13,830 --> 00:07:17,800
Well, how about those,
uh, Mets, huh? Guys?

149
00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:19,430
I don't care.

150
00:07:19,500 --> 00:07:22,900
I'm just glad we don't
have to talk about bras anymore.

151
00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:25,300
Uh, I have to go home
and do something.

152
00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:27,230
Anything, anything but this.

153
00:07:27,300 --> 00:07:28,300
Uh, Gordo.

154
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:31,830
Maybe you could stick around and help us
with Matt's contest entry.

155
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:37,230
Yeah. I'm Jet Li's sidekick
in his next movie.

156
00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:38,760
I could go home and get my camera.

157
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:40,630
That's a great idea!

158
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:42,100
All right, I'll be back in ten minutes.

159
00:07:44,760 --> 00:07:47,500
Buddy, I thought we were
going to write an essay.

160
00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:54,060
Dad. Let's call that Plan B.

161
00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:58,500
You cracked like an egg.

162
00:07:59,030 --> 00:08:00,030
I got us here.

163
00:08:00,100 --> 00:08:01,700
Yeah. With your mom.

164
00:08:02,630 --> 00:08:04,130
Can I help you two with something?

165
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:05,800
Yeah, hi.

166
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,930
We are shopping for their first bras.

167
00:08:10,660 --> 00:08:12,600
This is so cool!

168
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,300
Where's the Little Miss section?

169
00:08:15,460 --> 00:08:17,430
Over there, by the footie pajamas.

170
00:08:17,500 --> 00:08:19,160
Okay, great, thanks. Come on, girls.

171
00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:21,800
Mom.

172
00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,200
Do you think maybe we can
be a little quieter about this?

173
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:26,360
About what?

174
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,960
Oh. Nothing.

175
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,260
Why doesn't she
get her own talk show,

176
00:08:32,330 --> 00:08:33,860
-and broadcast it to the world?
-LIPS: Bra, bra, bra, bra.

177
00:08:34,700 --> 00:08:36,000
Can we ditch her? Please?

178
00:08:36,630 --> 00:08:38,930
No! But we can pretend
to get lost, come on.

179
00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:41,660
-Come on. [GASPS] Excuse me.
-[GASPS]

180
00:08:42,630 --> 00:08:44,430
Hi, Lizzie. Miranda.

181
00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:45,960
Mr. Coppersmith.

182
00:08:46,430 --> 00:08:48,000
No! Not happening.

183
00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:50,500
I'm not running
into my cute English teacher

184
00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:52,400
in the you-know-what department.

185
00:08:52,930 --> 00:08:56,200
Shouldn't he be home
handling grammar emergencies?

186
00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:59,560
I'm just buying
a birthday present for my wife.

187
00:09:00,060 --> 00:09:02,700
Hey, girls, I found some
really cute things for you guys.

188
00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:05,400
Hey, Mr. Coppersmith,
how you doing?

189
00:09:05,560 --> 00:09:07,460
-Hi. I'm good, good.
-Good to see you.

190
00:09:07,530 --> 00:09:08,730
So, why don't you take these on

191
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:10,230
into the dressing room
and try them on, okay?

192
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:11,760
[WHIMPERS]

193
00:09:12,230 --> 00:09:14,000
-[STUTTERS]
-Let's go.

194
00:09:14,560 --> 00:09:18,400
This has got to be enough to get me
into the Witness Relocation Program.

195
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:19,960
Where's Matt?

196
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:21,360
Upstairs, getting ready.

197
00:09:21,930 --> 00:09:23,530
I got some interview
questions for you.

198
00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:26,400
"What's your name?,

199
00:09:26,630 --> 00:09:27,630
"How old are you?,

200
00:09:28,330 --> 00:09:29,500
"Where do you go to school?"

201
00:09:29,660 --> 00:09:31,560
That is my absolute favorite.

202
00:09:31,700 --> 00:09:35,060
These are some really
great questions, Mr. McGuire.

203
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,830
But, you know, there-there
are some other ways we can go.

204
00:09:37,900 --> 00:09:39,800
Hi-yah!

205
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:42,760
Looking good, Matt.

206
00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:44,300
So what I was thinking is,

207
00:09:44,430 --> 00:09:46,660
we shoot a couple of cool
establishing shots.

208
00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:48,700
Matt raking in the Zen garden...

209
00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:49,930
We don't have a Zen garden.

210
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:51,530
And what about my questions?

211
00:09:51,660 --> 00:09:54,400
-Questions aren't very...
-Boring.

212
00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:55,860
-Boring?
-Mr. McGuire,

213
00:09:55,930 --> 00:09:58,760
if Matt's gonna win this thing,
we need something big.

214
00:09:59,230 --> 00:10:01,760
Something that's gonna set
his entry apart from the rest.

215
00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:03,060
Okay, Gordo.

216
00:10:04,060 --> 00:10:05,160
What would you suggest?

217
00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:07,960
I think we need to shoot
our own martial arts movie.

218
00:10:10,560 --> 00:10:13,260
You are way too cool
to be Lizzie's friend.

219
00:10:13,900 --> 00:10:15,660
LIZZIE: Okay,
so getting lost didn't work.

220
00:10:15,730 --> 00:10:16,730
What do we do?

221
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:18,800
MIRANDA: Well, we're
supposed to be adults, right?

222
00:10:19,230 --> 00:10:20,300
LIZZIE: So?

223
00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:22,700
MIRANDA: So, tell her
we want to shop alone.

224
00:10:23,430 --> 00:10:25,230
LIZZIE: If you're so adult,
why don't you tell her?

225
00:10:25,730 --> 00:10:27,660
MIRANDA: Are you insane?
You tell her.

226
00:10:27,730 --> 00:10:28,730
LIZZIE: I'm not telling her.

227
00:10:28,860 --> 00:10:29,860
-Telling me what?
-[GASPS]

228
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:31,430
Mom, I could've been changing.

229
00:10:31,500 --> 00:10:33,460
Oh, honey, it's just us girls here.

230
00:10:33,530 --> 00:10:34,560
No. It's not.

231
00:10:35,030 --> 00:10:37,700
[SIGHS] Well, here, I just brought
you some more stuff to try on.

232
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:39,830
We can find things on our own.

233
00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:41,630
Okay, I'm just trying to help.

234
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:42,860
We don't need your help.

235
00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:44,960
Okay.

236
00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:46,800
What do you need?

237
00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:49,260
We need you to leave us alone, okay?

238
00:10:49,430 --> 00:10:51,800
You're always going on
about what little adults we are,

239
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,130
and when we try to act like adults,

240
00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,530
you treat us like we're children.

241
00:10:54,660 --> 00:10:57,160
We're not children, okay?
We're just not.

242
00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:00,160
Okay.

243
00:11:01,330 --> 00:11:04,930
[SIGHS] Here's $40.

244
00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:07,300
I'm gonna be in the food court.

245
00:11:07,860 --> 00:11:09,760
You come find me when
you're all finished, okay?

246
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:15,700
That wasn't exactly the way I pictured

247
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,430
the "adult" conversation
between you and your mom.

248
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:20,400
Well, me neither.

249
00:11:20,860 --> 00:11:22,530
But a girl's got to do
what a girl's got to do.

250
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,400
On the plus side,

251
00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:26,400
we're alone in the mall

252
00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:28,760
with your mom's cash.

253
00:11:30,260 --> 00:11:32,100
I know I got exactly what I wanted.

254
00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:34,400
So why don't I feel any better?

255
00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:43,060
This is so much easier
without my mother hanging around.

256
00:11:43,130 --> 00:11:44,230
Exactly.

257
00:11:45,060 --> 00:11:46,660
So, what are we looking for?

258
00:11:47,460 --> 00:11:48,760
I don't know, I thought you knew.

259
00:11:48,860 --> 00:11:50,430
I thought I did, too.

260
00:11:50,630 --> 00:11:53,200
But there's all these
numbers and-and letters.

261
00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:56,060
Thirty-twos, thirty-fours, thirty-six,

262
00:11:56,460 --> 00:11:57,830
As, Bs, Cs...

263
00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:00,000
Well, I mean, Kate owns one, right?

264
00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:01,130
How hard can it be?

265
00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:04,100
And action!

266
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:08,730
You should have never have come
back here, Matthew-san.

267
00:12:09,430 --> 00:12:12,230
Now, I will be forced to destroy you.

268
00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:14,560
You cannot destroy...

269
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:15,830
[GRUNTS]

270
00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:18,260
...what you cannot catch.

271
00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:19,560
[BOTH YELLING]

272
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:33,400
Ow!

273
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,430
-[YELLS]
-Aah. Ow.

274
00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:03,230
That's what Jet Li's sidekick does.

275
00:13:03,930 --> 00:13:05,460
And cut.

276
00:13:08,300 --> 00:13:09,300
[GASPS]

277
00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:11,000
What are you guys doing here?

278
00:13:11,130 --> 00:13:13,130
-[GASPS]
-You must be lost.

279
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,400
The dork section is on the first floor.

280
00:13:15,860 --> 00:13:18,300
Is there some kind of rule
that Kate and her posse

281
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:21,360
have to witness every
moment of misery in my life?

282
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:23,830
[SCOFFS] We're shopping.

283
00:13:23,900 --> 00:13:25,430
-Yeah. Shopping.
-LIZZIE: Hmm.

284
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:28,360
-For what?
-They don't sell Underoos here.

285
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:29,800
Claire. Kate.

286
00:13:30,030 --> 00:13:32,530
I can't believe you're
shopping with Claire's mom.

287
00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,460
[SCOFFS] Yeah, we don't
have to shop with our mom.

288
00:13:34,730 --> 00:13:36,600
Claire, there you are.

289
00:13:37,060 --> 00:13:38,930
Hi, Lizzie, hi, Miranda,

290
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,160
I haven't seen
you girls around for a while.

291
00:13:41,230 --> 00:13:42,230
Where's your mom?

292
00:13:42,500 --> 00:13:44,330
Oh, we get to shop by ourselves.

293
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:46,160
By yourselves?

294
00:13:47,100 --> 00:13:48,100
So do you need any help?

295
00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,560
No, no, no. No. No, no.

296
00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:51,630
We're fine.

297
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:54,400
Okay then. Tell your moms I said hi.

298
00:13:55,930 --> 00:13:58,830
The footie pajamas are over there,
in the toddler section.

299
00:13:58,930 --> 00:14:00,830
[CHUCKLES] Good one.

300
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:04,800
[SCOFFS]

301
00:14:04,900 --> 00:14:07,330
"Only when the student
can take the pebble

302
00:14:07,660 --> 00:14:12,430
"from the Master does the student
become Jet Li's sidekick."

303
00:14:15,030 --> 00:14:17,230
-Yes.
-Okay, cut, cut.

304
00:14:17,430 --> 00:14:18,860
Um, Mr. McGuire,

305
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,860
this is the climax of the movie,

306
00:14:20,930 --> 00:14:23,160
so it's kind of important
that you stick to the script.

307
00:14:23,230 --> 00:14:25,500
-I did.
-No. You have to close your hands

308
00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:27,060
when Matt tries to get the stone.

309
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:28,600
You got to make it look a little hard.

310
00:14:28,830 --> 00:14:30,030
Yeah, I'm sorry, Gordo,

311
00:14:30,100 --> 00:14:32,600
but I don't think a kung fu
rip-off is as effective

312
00:14:32,660 --> 00:14:36,060
as a well-written and perfectly,
grammatically correct essay.

313
00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:38,630
What are you talking about?
It's totally better!

314
00:14:39,830 --> 00:14:40,830
Well, you know, you two seem

315
00:14:40,900 --> 00:14:44,530
to have a better feel
for this stuff than I do, so,

316
00:14:45,330 --> 00:14:47,060
I'll just leave you to it.

317
00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:53,660
-DAVID: <i>Hello?</i>
-Hey, David, it's Sam.

318
00:14:53,730 --> 00:14:56,000
<i>-Oh, hi, Sam.</i>
-Yeah. I need a favor.

319
00:14:56,330 --> 00:14:57,830
Are you still teaching kung fu?

320
00:14:59,130 --> 00:15:00,560
We are so lost.

321
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,000
I have no clue what I'm doing.

322
00:15:04,460 --> 00:15:06,160
I need Mr. Snuggles.

323
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:07,630
This was a total mistake.

324
00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:09,700
Maybe we're not ready.

325
00:15:10,330 --> 00:15:14,030
You know, I don't need a salesperson.
And I don't need Miss Miller.

326
00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:15,660
Miranda?

327
00:15:16,430 --> 00:15:17,700
I think I need my mom.

328
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,000
It's the best idea you've had all day.

329
00:15:20,130 --> 00:15:21,160
Let's go.

330
00:15:22,060 --> 00:15:23,660
Only once the pebble has been taken

331
00:15:23,730 --> 00:15:26,000
by the student
from the Master's t... Nah.

332
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:29,100
Only once the Master
has given the... No.

333
00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:31,230
Student can take the pebble
from the Master's...

334
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:33,800
Jet Li's sidekick.

335
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:37,860
Jet Li's sidekick.

336
00:15:39,300 --> 00:15:40,300
[GRUNTS] Mine.

337
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:41,960
Jet Li's sidekick.

338
00:15:44,460 --> 00:15:45,460
[GRUNTS]

339
00:15:45,900 --> 00:15:48,100
Gordo, we've done this
seven times already.

340
00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:49,300
Aren't we done yet?

341
00:15:49,430 --> 00:15:51,400
I'm sorry, Matt,
but this was a lot easier

342
00:15:51,460 --> 00:15:53,800
-with your father helping.
-Then let's go get him.

343
00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,130
Mr. McGuire, we really need your help.

344
00:15:57,200 --> 00:16:00,430
Guys, I told you, I really don't know
much about this kung fu stuff.

345
00:16:00,900 --> 00:16:02,200
But I know someone who does.

346
00:16:10,460 --> 00:16:13,100
Hello, young grasshopper.

347
00:16:14,700 --> 00:16:17,760
Dad? Why is he
calling me grasshopper?

348
00:16:17,900 --> 00:16:19,100
Just go with it, son.

349
00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:25,130
Your father tells me
you wish to be a martial artist.

350
00:16:25,330 --> 00:16:28,030
Yeah. Jet Li's sidekick.

351
00:16:28,130 --> 00:16:30,330
[IMITATES KUNG FU YELLS]

352
00:16:32,830 --> 00:16:34,860
I have much to teach you.

353
00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:37,630
But you must be willing to learn.

354
00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:40,200
Okay.

355
00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:44,500
Hey, girls.

356
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:46,700
You finished your shopping?

357
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:47,900
Not exactly.

358
00:16:48,260 --> 00:16:50,360
It didn't really go
the way we planned.

359
00:16:51,330 --> 00:16:53,830
Listen, I'm really sorry.

360
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,900
-You know what, Mom...
-No, let me finish.

361
00:16:56,430 --> 00:16:58,360
I remember when I was 13,

362
00:16:58,430 --> 00:16:59,830
and my mom would
take me shopping,

363
00:16:59,900 --> 00:17:03,060
she would do everything
imaginable to embarrass me,

364
00:17:03,130 --> 00:17:04,460
and I promised myself

365
00:17:04,530 --> 00:17:06,530
I would never act like that
with my own daughter.

366
00:17:06,900 --> 00:17:08,360
Mom, you didn't act that way.

367
00:17:08,430 --> 00:17:11,400
You're right, I was worse,
and you are becoming adults,

368
00:17:11,460 --> 00:17:14,160
and I, I should've let you
just do it on your own,

369
00:17:14,230 --> 00:17:15,260
and I'm sorry.

370
00:17:15,330 --> 00:17:17,360
No, you really shouldn't have.

371
00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:19,030
And we're not adults.

372
00:17:19,260 --> 00:17:20,830
Uh, not even close.

373
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,300
And you know that temper-tantrum
I just threw in the dressing room?

374
00:17:24,700 --> 00:17:26,360
Not exactly adult material.

375
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:29,760
So, I'm really sorry.

376
00:17:31,130 --> 00:17:32,130
Me, too.

377
00:17:33,730 --> 00:17:36,600
And I guess the adult thing
to do sometimes is ask for help.

378
00:17:39,060 --> 00:17:40,630
You didn't buy anything, did you?

379
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,360
-Nope.
-Nada.

380
00:17:42,530 --> 00:17:43,960
Well, let's go shopping.

381
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:46,160
Give me my $40.

382
00:17:46,230 --> 00:17:47,560
-Ah.
-Ah.

383
00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:48,660
[CHUCKLING]

384
00:17:48,930 --> 00:17:51,000
They forget to sign your field trip forms.

385
00:17:51,060 --> 00:17:52,600
Forget you don't like liverwurst.

386
00:17:52,930 --> 00:17:55,060
But they never forget
when they give you cash.

387
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:12,960
Ow!

388
00:18:15,230 --> 00:18:16,230
Pretty good.

389
00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:27,300
What?

390
00:18:30,530 --> 00:18:31,530
Hey!

391
00:18:34,730 --> 00:18:35,730
Hi-yah!

392
00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:47,960
Hi-yah! Hi-yah!

393
00:18:54,260 --> 00:18:55,300
Hi-yah!

394
00:18:58,030 --> 00:19:00,300
Hi...

395
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:04,860
Hi-yah! Hi-yah!

396
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:10,030
Hi-yah!

397
00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:14,630
[EXHALES] Class dismissed.

398
00:19:18,360 --> 00:19:20,800
When you can snatch
the pebble from my hand,

399
00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:25,060
it will be time for you
to be Jet Li's sidekick.

400
00:19:29,130 --> 00:19:31,430
Master. Why do you close your hand?

401
00:19:32,100 --> 00:19:34,760
You have many questions, grasshopper.

402
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,260
But I have a question for you, Matt.

403
00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,860
"What is it that qualifies you

404
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:45,530
"to be the best choice
to become Jet Li's sidekick?"

405
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:51,800
Well, because I'm smart,
and funny, and I do my own stunts.

406
00:19:52,260 --> 00:19:54,630
[IMITATES KUNG FU YELLS]

407
00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:57,900
Yeah!

408
00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:01,300
How'd you do that?

409
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,800
Whoo-hoo! Who's the grasshopper now?

410
00:20:04,860 --> 00:20:08,660
[SING-SONG] Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!

411
00:20:08,730 --> 00:20:11,000
And, cut. That's a wrap.

412
00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,660
My work is done.

413
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,100
Dad, high-five, you're the coolest.

414
00:20:34,460 --> 00:20:36,960
Mr. McGuire, who was that guy?

415
00:20:38,060 --> 00:20:40,400
Gordo, I've known him all my life.

416
00:20:41,460 --> 00:20:42,660
He's like a brother to me.

417
00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,430
I can't believe you spent all
afternoon with Matt. And my dad.

418
00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:52,500
Hey, Matt-Matt
and your dad are pretty cool.

419
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:53,760
We made a kung fu movie,

420
00:20:53,830 --> 00:20:57,800
and considering the alternative,
I'd say it was a good choice.

421
00:20:58,100 --> 00:20:59,830
Well, I don't think
we'll be having anymore

422
00:20:59,900 --> 00:21:01,960
girl-only shopping trips
for quite a while.

423
00:21:02,030 --> 00:21:05,200
Yeah, Gordo. Uh, it's safe
to go with us to the mall again.

424
00:21:05,260 --> 00:21:07,160
Cool. But when you start talking

425
00:21:07,230 --> 00:21:09,230
about shopping for school supplies,

426
00:21:09,630 --> 00:21:11,800
let me know when you
mean school supplies, or, uh,

427
00:21:12,260 --> 00:21:14,160
-school supplies.
-[BOTH CHUCKLING]

428
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:15,600
BOTH: Deal.

429
00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:17,830
My work here is done. Hi-yah!

430
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:21,560
Hello?

431
00:21:23,030 --> 00:21:24,930
This is Matt McGuire's father.

432
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,530
You're calling from
the Jet Li sidekick contest?

433
00:21:30,230 --> 00:21:34,500
He won? Matt's going
to be Jet Li's sidekick?

434
00:21:35,330 --> 00:21:37,530
[SCREAMS]

435
00:21:43,630 --> 00:21:45,930
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

436
00:22:02,630 --> 00:22:04,360
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]