Koi seyo shounen shoujo tachi
Kirari hitomi ni hoshi irete
Umareta manma no jounetsu ga
Hibana chirasu Jungle Hare nochi Guu!
Mekurumeku koshitsuki MUCHO
Kodomo nya kiwadoi AMIGO
Kisu shitara suikomaresou
Kowai mono mitasa TONIGHT
Ojikeduitara dame
Oshite osarete GOING
Dokkiri kibun ga iine
Chakkari asa made DANCING
LOVE LOVE LOVE
TROPICANA
Yashi no kokage de tsukamaete
Jirashite tokoton tokoton
Gomen ne anata wa mou toriko
Nigerarenai Jungle Hare nochi Guu!
Koi seyo shounen shoujo tachi
Kirari hitomi ni hoshi irete
Umareta manma no jounetsu ga
Hibana chirasu Jungle Hare nochi Guu!
Time to have some!
Oh my, Haré-sama, you shouldn't do that.
It's basic table manners not to make noise while drinking tea.
Oh, sorry.
That's right.
I've been telling him over and over...
You just don't sound convincing. That's all.
Ah! I see!
Haré-sama, think of this as an opportunity to learn table manners!
PACHIMON
Now, the manners I'd like you to learn most are the those for a French meal.
That's right! Do your best!
Bell-sensei, presently I believe the person who needs to learn manners the most is close by.
But what do you think?
I wonder who that could be.
It's you!
What?
If it's something this troublesome, I won't do it unless you show me an example first!
Geez, you take advantage of things way too much!
To not do it after your son goes that far...
The way you were dressed until a few minutes ago seems like it was all a lie.
When I put my mind to it, I can do it.
Hey, why do I have to change clothes?
This is to get into the mood.
Now, please believe that where we're headed is a top-tier restaurant.
W-What is this?
You prepared this?
This looks like a restaurant, right?
And the people?
They are all servants for this house.
Are they all bored?
Welcome.
A party of five?
Yes.
Even Ashio, too?
In any case, Mom is Mom so her fake demeanor will be revealed soon enough.
Haré!
Just you watch, how your mother lives her life!
But, it's just table manners, right?
That was a fine meal.
That was perfect, Ojou-sama!
Your voice is so different.
Shut up.
If you keep whining, I'll shut that mouth of yours for you, brat.
Don't threaten me with that poised look of yours.
Ah, I'm worn out!
And don't you change right back!
Another glass of wine!
Wait, Bell, you don't care if the manners are like some quick trick?
Well, now that you mention it...
Bell, I love you!
It's okay. It's totally okay!
So useless...
Next, it's your turn, Haré-sama and Guu-sama.
The meal will be arriving soon, so maintain grace.
Sorry to make you wait!
Sir, is this your first time here?
Weda-san, what's that look?
A cute little waitress!
What are you doing!?
First, how to drink soup...
I guess I'll do it.
Take the spoon, slide it in from the front of the bowl, and scoop away from you.
Drink the soup by pouring the soup on the spoon into your mouth from the tip.
See, all gone.
Don't place the spoon perpendicular to your mouth, or lick the spoon. Piece of cake, huh?
Don't place the spoon perpendicular to your mouth, or lick the spoon. Regardless of how you do it, don't eat the plate...
You use the outermost knife and fork first.
It takes time to get used to knives and forks, but for now, try to use them well.
Oh, it's easy to clink them against the plates, so do be careful of that...
Oh, this is so troublesome!
...and cut the food into portions that are easy for you to eat, then secure it on the fork. Mom, do I really have to learn this?
When you bring it close to your mouth, don't hurry - bring it up slowly. Open your mouth only a little bit, and bite in.
Oh, I lack manners, so if you talk to me, you'll become uncouth, too.
Now she's all sulking and stuff...
Ah, I'm so tired...
Why is Mom like that?
Why is Weda-san like that? Why is Mom like that?
You too, Robert?
Oh, pardon me, that was nothing.
But still, you've got one giant sigh there.
Haré-sama, you're so kind.
You're going to listen to my story, huh?
Actually, I don't think I have a choice.
I came to this city after I graduated from high school.
...and while I didn't know left from right, Bell-san found me.
She arranged things so that I could work in this mansion.
I really admire Bell-san.
She's a strong, kind, amazing person!
Really...
That's why when I heard that she was going to the jungle to pick Weda-san...
What kind of a person is the young lady?
My angel, my dream, my happiness...
Ojou-sama is my everything!
If you fall for her, I'll kill you.
Understood!
I knew her face from photographs...
But since Bell-san was so head-over-heels for her...
I thought that she must be an innocent, elegant, beautiful person like a white lily that just came into bloom.
The exact opposite.
That's right! She's the exact opposite!
I'm sorry, Mom... I can't deny that.
So...
If you talk to me, you'll become uncouth, too.
Things like that should be...
You shouldn't do that.
If you were to speak with me, your mannerisms will be lacking as well.
Whose mother is that?
In the first place, she's so adored by Bell-san...
...and the worst part is that she doesn't realize it at all!
Poor Bell-san!
Are you in love with Bell?
Oh, no! Of course not.
You're not?
Bell-san is...
...my idol.
She's strong.
She can do anything, and yet she doesn't forget to do her best...
I wish I could be like that.
That's why...
I want Weda-san to be a person worthy of being someone that Bell-san...
...whom I look up to so much, in return looks up to herself.
So Robert doesn't like Mom too much.
More precisely, he hates her?
Can you be a bit less blunt than that?
It can be believed that there are parts of him that don't exactly hate her, but to make a final decision...
That's beating around the bush too much! I don't understand you!
You know, Guu...
I wish Robert would fall in love with Mom.
R-Really?
Don't fake a surprised look for no reason.
I see. In other words, Haré...
I love you, Weda-san.
No, you shouldn't.
A boy with a promising future like you shouldn't date an old hag like me.
You want things to turn out this way, huh?
That doesn't even contain 1% of what I'm wishing for.?
You don't mind an old hag?
I don't mind an old hag.
Robert...
Weda.
I think it's totally okay!
A surprise ending!
And I'm telling you, that's wrong!
I just don't like her being hated.
Mom does have good points.
For example?
A good quality.
A good quality...
A good quality of mine?
Yeah.
I just wanted Robert to know what your good points were.
Let's see...
If I had to give an example, it would be that I do things at my pace?
In this case, I think that would be a bad trait.
Robert looks up to people who possess traits that are more amazing than his own.
Yeah, that's it!
Mom, don't you have something amazing?
I'm amazing when I take my clothes off!
Stop that.
Why?
I've seen enough of it.
What are Mom's special traits?
Maybe it is hunting after all...
But what can you hunt here?
Mom is...
...selfish, drunk, lazy, troublesome, unmotivated, clingy, whiny, forgetful, sleepy, loves stripping...
I think of her this way and I'm her son!
There's no way that Robert would come to like Mom...
Hey, Guu, do you know what Mom's good qualities are?
Weda's strong points?
How she's honest to herself?
Right! That's stretching it a bit, but that's a good...
She sleeps when she wants to sleep.
She eats when she wants to eat.
She doesn't do anything that she doesn't want to do.
No good.
If you want them to be friendly that much, then how about leaving them alone together?
All alone, huh...
Exactly.
If they can sit down and talk things out, he'll probably think that Weda is a pretty good person after all.
That's true.
He doesn't have to admire her.
If only he doesn't hate her...
That's right.
He doesn't necessarily have to see something amazing about mom, like when she's doing her best at something.
In this case, something less will do.
I see, Weda doing her best...
For now, let's have them be alone for a while.
Then, let's go in here.
All right.
There's one thing that would make Weda do her best.
What? What is it?
Something that Weda, as a mother, absolutely would do her best at...
There's only one thing.
Well, bluntly put...
Who's the guy interrupting our game?
Hey, I'm tellin' ya, hurry up and fill the bags with money!
Y-Yes...
Her son in danger.
Don't make noise, kid!
Hey, who pushed the emergency button?
The hero's party is currently gathering up their coins.
Dick, cast a protective spell.
Sure.
Magic Shield!
We said, don't make noise!
Now we can see Weda do her best.
Isn't that great, Haré?
It's not great!
It's a bank robbery!
Oh, I wonder if it's a movie shoot.
M-M-M-M-Mom!
Help us!
Stay still!
I'll hit you with a Drain spell!
Can you settle for something like Poison instead?
Haré!
Guu-sama!
To the robbers, stop this futile resistance and...
Shut up, you're only a weakling!
Give us money and a car!
We've got hostages!
Weda-san!
Wait here!
I'll go rescue them!
I have to go rescue them. I'll go rescue them!
What are you thinking?
What? I'm going to go rescue them!
That's my job!
Weda-san, stay here and sit still!
You're kidding me!
I'm going to go rescue Haré!
You can't!
Let go of my hand! That's an order!
I hate how you act so selfishly and don't think about the people around you, Weda-san!
I'm supposed to be the one protecting Haré-sama!
I am!
ME! I am!
The first Wacky Haré Rescue Race begins!
Hey, Guu, aren't you scared?
Of what?
I mean... aren't you scared of this situation.
Of that?
Not that...
It was my mistake to expect a human response out of her.
Maybe I'm just going to die here.
Cheer up.
Guu...
There are plenty of things tougher than this out there.
I can't take them if there are.
There are many things that are tougher than death itself.
The only one I really love is you, he said.
I want you to wait for me, he said. I will definitely return, he said.
He always said things that were fitting at the time...
That perverted old geezer!
Don't come out at a time like this!
Think about the situation!
You there! Don't move!
S-Sure!
Existence of many tough situations, example 1.
It doesn't do me much good to know that right now.
It was such a short life...
A good thing about you, Haré, is that you're good at resigning yourself.
It was a life that forced me to do so often.
It was fulfilling, then?
I guess so...
It was a life that had its own kind of happiness.
Happiness...
Happiness! Happiness! Happiness!
I don't want to die yet!
What is it!?
U-Um, well, uh...
Bathroom... I guess?
Hold it. I'm going first.
Okay!
That's where...
I can get in. I can get in.
I told you to not come with me!
And don't mimic me!
I'm not mimicking you!
Go over there!
I don't want to!
You over there.
This area is off limits.
Please evacuate immediately.
Oh, I'm having one of my seizures!
Are you all right, young lady?
Excuse me, can you call a doctor?
Time is critical! Please hurry!
Uh, sure...
Let's see...
A doctor... a doctor, you say...
Must be working too hard...
Oh, no!
This is tight!
Don't make so much noise! This is tight!
What are we going to do if they find us!?
You're the noisy one!
Who is!?
Geez, this is taking things too far!
You are, Weda-san!
In any case, they'll find us easily if we stay here.
Let's hide.
Can you stop ordering me around?
It's not an order!
I'm saying so because it's dangerous!
E-Excuse me...
Please, take your time.
Um, are you a criminal?
That idiot's taking his time pissing...
He better not be boosting his stats by himself.
Guu, can't you do something?
For example?
You know, like asking them nicely with that business look of yours.
Business look?
Yeah, that look, that one.
Ask them if they can at least release the women, children, and the elderly.
Right?
But...
Don't do meaningless things!
You can do it, Guu!
Come on, please?
All right, Guu will do her best.
Oh, oomph!
No need for oomphs!
Don't just sit there, hurry up and release the hostages, idiot.
Wrong!!
That's what that boy over there was saying!
Oh, that's an amusing thing to say.
I didn't say it, I didn't say it, I didn't say it... Oh, that's an amusing thing to say.
I didn't say it, I didn't say it, I didn't say it...
Your face tells me you're quite low level...
I didn't say it, I didn't say it, I didn't say it...
Um, d-d-d-do you like games?
No, no, no, no, it was nothing. Excuse me.
Don't mock me!
Of course I do!
I'm in the middle of raising a monster for the upcoming tournament.
You know what Pachimon is?
Oh, you mean Pachinko Monsters...
I actually analyze data every so often.
Wanna see?
S-Sure!
I heard that there's a rare monster called Nagoya-ucchie...
But I don't know where to get it.
Do you know where?
If it's Nagoya-ucchie, I know where it is.
Seriously? Where? Where?
Let's see, it was in the hidden dungeon...
T-The money is ready.
All right! Okay!
Now, to clear this game, I've got the golden coins, Excalibur...
...the hero's sword, and for last, the divine shield.
Who should it be?
I hope it's not me. I hope it's not me. I hope it's not me...
I don't want to go home tonight.
What!?
I want to see the ocean.
Don't ask for the impossible!
If you ask that much...
Oh, and you too, my Pachimon friend.
Friend? Since when?
What are you giving him suggestions?
"Gather roses while you may."
I don't need them!
"Spare the rod and spoil the child."
We might never come back again!
Gimme a break! I can't take it anymore!
Um...
Who's there!?
I-I was upstairs, and didn't realize what was going on...
...and a guy in a hat told me to come downstairs...
Mom, what's with that falsetto?
No, wait, why are you here!?
Where's the guy with the hat?
He said he was going to see if anyone else was around.
It looks like the gang leader is the guy downstairs.
I'll be the decoy.
It's all right.
I'm good at it.
Besides, Robert, you're tough...
I have to settle this in one shot.
For Haré-sama... and Weda-san.
Go over there.
What should I do?
Haré is too close to the robber!
Hurry up!
Wait, Robert!
I'll take that item.
Otherwise, you'll see a bad ending.
You're disturbing my important game.
Well, maybe this is one of the events to go through.
I guess I'll defeat one of the bosses and get bonus points.
After all, it's our turn next.
See ya!
Dammit!
Game over, so to say...
A bad end, huh...
Mom! I was so scared!
It's all right, you're fine, I'm glad...
Hey!
Pachimon kid...
I forgot to ask you where the rare monster lives.
Oh, that's...
No, you don't have to tell me...
Since it looks like I'll have plenty of free time coming up.
It was an incident that happened because someone confused a game with reality.
Don't act so political...
Is that how you're going to wrap this up?
Ah, paradise...
Geez, just when Robert started to think better of you...
If he sees you like this, his evaluation of you will go down again.
So this is where you were.
T-That's not it, Robert!
Well, this Mom we have here is a fake...
That's right! She's controlled by the evil syndicate, and...
...and this really isn't how she is...
What's this about a syndicate? ...and this really isn't how she is...
I know that.
Haré-sama, you saw through it all along.
...that how Weda-san usually lives is all an act!
Huh?
She usually acts careless and lazy to fool people and catch them off guard!
Ah, that's right. Yeah, that's it exactly.
You're so awesome, Weda-san!
More than that, I'm thirsty.
I want to drink a frothy drink that's similar to barley tea.
You're going to pretend to drink beer!
Yes, sir!
Another servant friend.
NEXT EPISODE
This is an adult's love story.
An unexpected reunion of Weda and Clive in the city.
Where will the two head, their hearts trembling from premonitions of a passionate romance?
Now, now, now, that's slightly different!
We're going to rescue Mom from the evil clutches of the school doc!
Come on! Hurry up, we're going to follow him.
Geez, we're going to lose sight of him!
Well, damn him! Of all places to take Mom to, he took here there!?
Next episode of Haré+Guu: "Rest Stop"
By the way, Haré doesn't wear underwear.
Of course she's wrong!