The hairy, bloated sack of shit above is Jim. Jim has it in his head that there's nothing at all wrong with trying to set up appointments with adolescent girls for the purposes of taking nude photos of them...Among other things. But why am I spoiling the surprises in store? I'll just let ol'Jimmy-boy speak for himself... (Note: Jim initially tried several times contacting me via PM on Yahoo's java chat. Being as there is no copy/paste or archive function in the java chat, I prompted him to move to Messenger. My last line in java chat was, \"dont you have YIM?\" The chat picks up on his response.) jleno9: YIM? baby_cakes_1990: hello? jleno9: Yes? baby_cakes_1990: asl? jleno9: I am in Instant Messenger baby_cakes_1990: yah, me too silly jleno9: Cool...you look damn sexy baby_cakes_1990: tyvm baby_cakes_1990: asl? jleno9: male 35 Chicago and you? baby_cakes_1990: 13 f oak park jleno9: Wow that young and sexy huh? (It's safe to say my age registers with him.) baby_cakes_1990: hehe if u say so jleno9: Your pic looks pretty hot baby_cakes_1990: i got another 1 jleno9: Can I see it? baby_cakes_1990: sendin jleno9: thanks (I send another shot.) jleno9: Damn your very hot baby_cakes_1990: tyvm baby_cakes_1990: u got pics jleno9: you have a very hot bod baby_cakes_1990: ty u got pics baby_cakes_1990: ? jleno9: Yes but nude (Ooh. Red flag much?) baby_cakes_1990: i just wana see what u look lie jleno9: let me send one..not the best but (All the wannabee pedos say this. It must just be hard for them to face the fact that they're ugly.) baby_cakes_1990: hehe jleno9: sending baby_cakes_1990: gettin it jleno9: Ready to give it to you baby_cakes_1990: Oooh... (I get the photo above. Words fail me.) jleno9: You a virgin? (Let's just remove ALL doubt about our intentions, shall we? Thanks, tough guy. In fact...) baby_cakes_1990: you look liek a tough guy baby_cakes_1990: nope baby_cakes_1990: hehe jleno9: Gentle as a teddy bear baby_cakes_1990: awwww jleno9: May I ask your measurements? baby_cakes_1990: huh baby_cakes_1990: oh baby_cakes_1990: ok baby_cakes_1990: hehe jleno9: baby_cakes_1990: 34 24 34 baby_cakes_1990: i think anyhow jleno9: You look like your body is very sexy baby_cakes_1990: i jut know what my bras say jleno9: Wish your bra was off baby_cakes_1990: hehe baby_cakes_1990: me 2 jleno9: Then take it off baby_cakes_1990: i thot u meant in the pic baby_cakes_1990: hehe jleno9: Would you consider posing nude for me? (HEL-lo! Seems Jim's an amateur kiddie pornographer, as well! That's interesting information to have.) baby_cakes_1990: i dunno mebbe baby_cakes_1990: how? jleno9: Cool...what do you mean how? With a camera baby_cakes_1990: i dunno u got 1? jleno9: Of course a digital baby_cakes_1990: okay jleno9: Where could we meet? (Notice, folks...He's the one who suggests the meeting.) baby_cakes_1990: u just want pics jleno9: Well I'd love more but that would be up to you baby_cakes_1990: what u mean? baby_cakes_1990: liek what jleno9: Well seeing you nake would make my cock very hard baby_cakes_1990: okies jleno9: and maybe you would want to suck on it (Or, y'know. Maybe not. That'd be fine, too.) baby_cakes_1990: u think so lol baby_cakes_1990: okay mebbe jleno9: and maybe you would want me to make your pussy wet baby_cakes_1990: how u do that? jleno9: Well you would lay on the bed and I would spread your legs and lick and tongue your pussy baby_cakes_1990: i herd that s good but i nevr had it jleno9: Oh it is very good baby_cakes_1990: u liek that? jleno9: I do and like the way it makes you feel baby_cakes_1990: u wanna do that jleno9: of course baby_cakes_1990: liek, wit me? jleno9: like yeah baby_cakes_1990: 4 realz? jleno9: 4 realz baby_cakes_1990: wow sounds awesome baby_cakes_1990: im up fer it jleno9: would be and cool baby_cakes_1990: u got any more pics, d00d? jleno9: yeah but not very clear jleno9: Thats iw hy I bought the digital baby_cakes_1990: hehe baby_cakes_1990: lets see what u got baby_cakes_1990: gettin it (Yep. It's a nude. I'll spare you nice folks the humiliating spectacle. Suffice it to say, the guy's hung like a AAA battery. Yes. TRIPLE A. I dunno where he's goin' with that roll o' dimes, but I hope it ain't the casino. They have a dress code. Item 1: PANTS.) jleno9: cool baby_cakes_1990: nice jleno9: Thanks jleno9: So you want to pose and maybe play? baby_cakes_1990: hells yah jleno9: Well how do we make it happen? (Note the eagerness. He really wants to make this a reality.) baby_cakes_1990: dunno i never done this b4 jleno9: Well when might you have a couple of hours available? baby_cakes_1990: dood my dads at work now jleno9: Yeah but when do you have time to get out? baby_cakes_1990: i got nuttin but homework goin on now jleno9: Well you need to let me know when you can get away baby_cakes_1990: im tellin u d00d i got time liek 2nite jleno9: Think about hot nice it will feel to have your pussy eaten (Again...I'm speechless.) baby_cakes_1990: and im all horny now jleno9: You? You should see my cock now (Why? So I can admire its shiny little copper top?) baby_cakes_1990: i dont wanna waste notime jleno9: Well it woould be nice to have a little notice baby_cakes_1990: why jleno9: About 45 minutes to Oak Park for me baby_cakes_1990: u married jleno9: Yes (Uh-oh. Jim's MARRIED. MAN would it be a shame if Jim's wife were to discover his hobby of photographing and fucking prepubescent girls. Maybe we shouldn't tell her? Nah. We should.) baby_cakes_1990: dont want her findin out jleno9: fer sure baby_cakes_1990: well, my dad dont get home till way late jleno9: Well does he always work late on Wednesday nights? baby_cakes_1990: no not always but sometimes jleno9: Well wouold you be able to tell me a couple of days ahead of time when he wil be gone? baby_cakes_1990: mebbe... baby_cakes_1990: why dont u gimme ur digits jleno9: Well if I give you my email you could send me jleno9: a message baby_cakes_1990: can i call baby_cakes_1990: i just wanna make sure ur 4 real jleno9: Right now? baby_cakes_1990: yah just to say hi baby_cakes_1990: il make it fast jleno9: Well if you want we can make it orgasmic baby_cakes_1990: then well know were 4 real baby_cakes_1990: ill keep it short jleno9: Let me get my phone baby_cakes_1990: okies jleno9: How do I know your not a cop? baby_cakes_1990: thats why im gonna call u u nut jleno9: )) jleno9: Hang on baby_cakes_1990: hurry jleno9: 6704289 baby_cakes_1990: 630? baby_cakes_1990: 847? baby_cakes_1990: 312? jleno9: 708 (For those who are taking notes, that's (708) 670-4289. That would be the cell number. Stay tuned for the home phone.) baby_cakes_1990: okies where u live? jleno9: south Chicago burbs..hang on till my cell powers up baby_cakes_1990: when i call answer the phone and say HEY BEKA so i know its u okay baby_cakes_1990: otherwise im gunna FREEK OUT jleno9: okay baby_cakes_1990: can i call jleno9: hang on something goofy with my cell baby_cakes_1990: whats ur name again baby_cakes_1990: im gettin old over here man (And we don't want that...I know you like 'em young.) jleno9: Jim baby_cakes_1990: baby_cakes_1990: ur jim okay jim im callen dont forget say hey beka okay? jleno9: I wont but I dont get what the hell is wrong with my phone... baby_cakes_1990: can i call baby_cakes_1990: can i call baby_cakes_1990: how bout now jleno9: call this number..3498586 jleno9: okay? baby_cakes_1990: 708? (Once again, that's (708) 349-8586. And that would be the home phone. You know...The one where his wife might pick up, and stuff.) jleno9: yes baby_cakes_1990: callen now baby_cakes_1990: heehe (I *67 and dial. Then, I hand the phone to my lovely wife, who has a youngish-sounding voice...but only when she wants to. He picks up with \"Hey, Beka.\" My wife has a brief conversation with Jim, mostly consisting of him asking her to call back on the original number...His cell. He's apparently sold on \"my\" authenticity.) baby_cakes_1990: callen the other 1 baby_cakes_1990: is that other one ur cell jleno9: coool jleno9: yes baby_cakes_1990: kewl baby_cakes_1990: kewl glad I got both numbers (Again, *67 and call. Again, \"Hey Beka.\" That's enough. She hangs up.) jleno9: you gonna call? baby_cakes_1990: And I'm also glad that you answered the phone both times with the special codephrase I gave you. The folks at http://www.perverted-justice.com really enjoy having multiple methods of reaching the wannabee pedophile posterboys we feature on the site. baby_cakes_1990: You might wanna bookmark that site. Your name, telephone number, photo, and a transcript of this chatlog will appear on the front page within 24 hours. Congratulations, you sick, twisted fuckmeat! Hope you enjoy your new celebrity as a wannabee pedophile posterboy, you pathetic shitbag! baby_cakes_1990: Got anything to say for yourself, you disgusting pig? baby_cakes_1990: Anything at all? baby_cakes_1990: The folks who will be reading this chatlog might take it easier on you if you sound at least a LITTLE sorry that you tried to fuck a 13-year-old girl. baby_cakes_1990: And take kiddie-porn photos of her. baby_cakes_1990: You foul, mealy-mouthed, revolting pile of human excrement. baby_cakes_1990: You disgust me. baby_cakes_1990: Nothing at all to say, huh? baby_cakes_1990: You have fifteen seconds to defend yourself. After that, I'm scurrying off to post everything about you on our website. baby_cakes_1990: 14 baby_cakes_1990: 13 baby_cakes_1990: 12 baby_cakes_1990: 11 baby_cakes_1990: 10 baby_cakes_1990: 9 baby_cakes_1990: 8 baby_cakes_1990: 7 baby_cakes_1990: 6 baby_cakes_1990: 5 baby_cakes_1990: 4 baby_cakes_1990: 3 baby_cakes_1990: 2 baby_cakes_1990: 1 baby_cakes_1990: Have it your way, you ass-faced troglodyte. Enjoy your new celebrity. There you have it, ladies and gents. Jim REALLY doesn't want Mrs. Pervert finding out about his extracurricular pursuits. So, be sure not to tell her. Especially not at three o'clock in the morning every day this week. That would be rude. See y'all. Beef out.