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Anonymous
Milwaukee Bucks - Yi Jianlian didn't want to play there for millions and millions of dollars. Atlanta Hawks - Famous for having nobody at their stadium until they started winning some games in the playoffs last year. Charlotte Bobcats - Nobody really cares about Carolina teams. This team is depressingly bad. Miami Heat - D-Wade flops and never gets called on it. Stole an NBA Championship. Orlando Magic - Fuck the Magic for getting like the only elite C of the current generation so far. They're never going to use it. Also: do they actually have fans? Washington Wizards - How does this team keep making the playoffs? Gilbert Arenas isn't even that good. Dallas Mavericks - Dirk is a pansy. They have a whiny owner. Houston Rockets - They have the bitchiest fans in the NBA. Memphis Grizzlies - No fans and they're destined to go to Vancouver. New Orleans Hornets - New Orleans didn't care about basketball until they got Chris Paul. San Antonio Spurs - Old. Boring. Fucking floppers. Denver Nuggets - Oh fuck, I named Detroit the national ghetto team, right? Well... this is number 2. Minnesota Timberwolves - Ever notice that the NBA has a lot of "who cares" teams? If the Timberwolves and the Bobcats somehow got LeBron, D-Wade, and CP3 on the same team they'd still be not worth mentioning. Oklahoma City Thunder - Hijacked the Sonics. Holy shit they look stupid. Oklahoma City? Bennett has been known to be trying to steal a team and put it in OKC (even though it's smaller than Tulsa) at least since Hurricane Katrina. Portland Trail Blazers - Greg Oden is 50 years old. Everybody calls them underrated so much that they're overrated. Utah Jazz - Mormons. Deron Williams is worse than Chris Paul, homers. Carlos Boozer is a traitor.
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