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Metsfag No. 124968
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Dear David Wright,
Your numbers look great, but I bet your batting average with RISP is unholy. I've never seen someone look so overmatched in clutch situations.
Dear Billy Wagner,
You can the man, but it seems once the pressure is too much, you end up on the DL. Fuck you.
Dear Luis Ayala,
No such thing as an easy inning, is there?
Dear Aaron Heilman,
Stop trying to be a strikeput pitcher. Go back to getting regular outs. Your fastball isn't fooling anyone.
Dear Pedro Feliciano,
Please flat-out refuse to pitch against righties.
Dear Luis Castillo,
Work out, learn to hit a line drive.
Dear Moises Alou,
Way to make every one of the 14 games you played count. Your the only guy I know who can get injured standing in left field for six innings.
Dear John Maine,
110 pitches over 5 innings isn't going to cut it.
Dear Oliver Perez,
Stop walking everyone.
Dear Jerry Manuel,
You should be shot for designated Ayala as closer. You're a fucking moron.
Dear Omar Minaya,
Thank you for not re-signing Chad Bradford, and not making a deal for bullpen help at the trade deadline. You fuckup.
See you all next season, Metsfag No. 124968
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