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Anonymous
OK /sp/oons, after reading this http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/olympics/article4582421.ece article I've decided to become an Olympian and I need your help deciding which event I should train for, and how to achieve my goal.

Some info:
20 year old male
6', Slender build
Long legs, fairly short arms
Very unsupple
Extremely unfit (hopefully I can turn this around no problem)
Britfag - I don't know if that will give me any advantage?

Feel free to ask more questions. I'm guessing middle distance running is most obvious (long distance is dominated by east africans) but I wonder if there are any other suggestions?

PS. Making it to the athletes village is satisfactory, however gold medal is prefered as I'd love to hang it off my cock as Victoria Pendleton gives me a blowjob.
>> Anonymous
>Victoria Pendleton

Her nose would stab you in the gut as soon as she kneeled down.
>> Alakazam !!OEP6m59Bksc
Eat 12,000 calories a day, run for 8 hours a day, presto you are an Olympian.
>> Anonymous
>>304026

You're thinking of Rebecca Adlington...
>> Anonymous
>>304029
Yeah, they start out young though, maybe if I eat 18k calories and run 12 hours a day...

Also, need to fit it around uni. Jesus, this task seems to be getting more and moredifficult by the minute, I already feel like giving up :(
>> Anonymous
>>304034
Shit, I was. Conitnue, anon.
>> Anonymous
Anyone know the time to qualify for the GBR men's 4x400m relay team?
>> Anonymous
I don't think you can do it.

But that's just me.
>> Anonymous
>>304112
All logic would point to fact that this is a near impossible task. I wonder what odds I could get at the bookies...

Maybe the (false) hope will get me motivated enough to get fit however, which is definately a good thing.
>> Anonymous
get something easier like shooting, rowing, sailing or badminton. or try to find out if you are connected enough to try to get into a team sports team even if it is to bench warm
>> Anonymous
No way you could get in team representing your country out of nowhere. Most athletes training since their childhood.

Unless you would change nationalitiy of some scrub low pop country where you would have better chances of qualifiing.

But not only athletes are getting free olympic village tickets. It's their servismen, trainers, medics etc etc.
>> Anonymous
>>304140
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...I have an idea, maybe I could get Bahrain or something to buy me for cheap? Probably have to become a muslim though which is a bit crap.
>> Anonymous
Archery
>> Anonymous
Ha, ha, if you haven't already been training half your life, you're going nowhere.
>> Anonymous
I play floorball, still not good enough to represent my country and its not olympic sport yet but it should be at 2020 olympics hopefully ._.
>> Anonymous
Pistol. It's the closest thing they have to darts. That's about the only thing you britfags are good at anyways.
>> Anonymous
Just start running and never stop for anything else than sleep, gym, food.
>> Sneak !!+y8MDiWrdyT
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>>304197

I just felt like runnin'...
>> Anonymous
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>20 year old

Too old. Yes, yes, he is too old to begin the training.
>> Anonymous
>>304240
Fail. It's "Too old, he is."
>> Anonymous
>>304243
faggot, you are
>> Anonymous
>>304247
he would never use the word faggot. fool.
>> Anonymous
lol all u brits are fucking retarded
ur not gonna make the team at all fuckwad
>> Anonymous
Try diving.

I'm eighteen, and I'm gonna try joining my local diving club or college swin club.

I dont really have dreams of being an olympian. But being a fierce competitor at various competitions would be nice.
>> Anonymous
>>304111
really fucking fast.
>> Anonymous
basically this confirms for me that the reason Alicia Sacramone failed so hard was because she was sore from being gangfucked in the ass the night before.
>> Anonymous
I'm thinking of trying a similar thing. My guess was that fencing would be the best. I mean, who the hell fences?