File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Teach me how to play basketball.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to get dunked on.
>> Anonymous
What a waste. All this guys needs is heart and he's set.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to be gay.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to rap.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8128
no.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win in playoffs.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to run up the middle.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to block.
>> Anonymous
>>8145
you fucking drafted him.
>> Anonymous
>>8170
Shit, how about a straight line.

Reggie Bush probably couldn't pass a sobriety test sober. He'd start juking the cop.
>> Anonymous
i lol'd @ thread
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to fight dogs.
>> Anonymous
So many lulz
>> Anonymous
>>8193
MJ is evil. Imagine all the fans' hearts when he beat those other teams for his championships. Imagine all the greats that didn't get their rings. MJ is the most evil man in sports history. Just ask Charles about his chaos dunk.
>> Anonymous
>>8228
that man is a God
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to beat up strippers.
>> Anonymous
>>8233
MJ should be the enemy/hero of /sp/. He is fueled by the fans' broken hearts and their tears.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win a ring.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to take steroids.
>> Anonymous
oh how i missed /sp/
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to not smoke weed.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to not fail until the end.
>> Anonymous
do a real non nigger sport
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to coach.
and how to stop eating 4 dinners a night.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to murder my wife.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to air ball free throws.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8277

Sure. I'll teach you.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to still retired.
>> Anonymous
>>8285
lololol
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me to be Whole Amazing.
>> Anonymous
>>8304
I lol'd.
>> Anonymous
>>8320
Then you must've missed it the first 132 times.
>> Anonymous
ITT why this board needs to stay
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to coach.
>> Anonymous
>>8276
sort of lol'd
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to GM.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me to snap a ball.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8454

Teach me how to hold ball.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me to go 18-1... again.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me to not beat my wife.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me fucking everything.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me proper grammar, charisma and how to not make a fool of myself.
>> Anonymous
>>8489
wrong board
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to suck.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8490
Oh. This is not /sp/? Sports and politics?
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to not destroy franchises
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to play defense.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me to not shoot my friend in the face.
>> CapitalistBastard !!f/pELCnjRD0
>>8504

It was fucking birdshot; the guy barely had a bruise.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to lose.
>> Anonymous
>CapitalistBastard !!f/pELCnjRD0
>> Anonymous
>>8515
The targets can't fly. They're always on the ground. Surgery fixed everything before that press conference.
>> Anonymous
>>8515
This thread just got worse...
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to fix basketball games
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8270
teach me how to beat tiger
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to rape ass
>> Anonymous
>>8601
No one can teach you that.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to draft.

and coach.

and do anything related to basketball but play point guard.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8609
Lol, I can

Yeah, me too
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8620
Teach me how to fire you
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win in a fight with an inanimate object. (In my case, a wall)
>> Anonymous
>>8628
Give me 50 million dollars I'll teach you.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to not get cancelled.

In fact, teach me how to be interesting or entertaining in any way at all.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to win home games
>> Anonymous
>>8648
He won the most important one. Not even Marino can say that.
>> Anonymous
DAN MARINOS DOLPHINS SUCKED SHIT WITHOUT HIM. LOOK AT THEM NOW.

IF MARINO HAD THE GIANTS D, MAYBE HE'D HAVE MOAR RINGS THAT BART STARR, JOE MONTANA, AIKMAN, AND THAT GUY WITH THE STEELERS COMBINED


FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCKK,
>> Anonymous
>>8698
SAYING THINGS IN CAPS LOCK WON'T MAKE THEM TRUE

THE GIANTS D WASN'T THAT GREAT. JUST A ONE-TIME THING. THEY SUCKED SHIT IN THE REGULAR SEASON BUT TURNED IT ON IN THE PLAYOFFS.
>> Anonymous
>>8698
Dan Marino could be almost as good as Terry Bradshaw? Whoa...
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8648
>home games
>home
>>8667
>super bowl
>> Anonymous
>>8709
I mean he doesn't have to win home games...
>> Anonymous
>>8703
They ranked 7th in the league during the regular season dumbass.
>> Anonymous
>>8667
Arizona=/=New Jersey

seriously, if he wants to be great, he needs to win where his fans are
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to SHUT THE FUCK UP
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win championships with Shaq.
>> Anonymous
>>8838
>without
>> Anonymous
nba died when Michael, Magic, Clyde, Dominique, Charles and Larry retired once they left it all became about the money and hype not about being a GREAT sportsperson! fuck the nba and fuck the douchbags who play in it
>> Anonymous
Great thread
>> Anonymous
>>8907
Just like every other sport amirite?
>> Anonymous
>>8907
welcome to the new generation?
>> Anonymous
>>8907
We're in a rebuilding phase.
>> Anonymous
the 03 draft got some great future star. also lol at the 2000 draft.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to play golf.
>> Anonymous
>>8963
I'll teach you to use that club, if you know what I mean.
>> Anonymous
>>8964
you lost me
>> Anonymous
Never in my wildest dreams I'd see a thread with Kwame as OP.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>8963

I know what you mean, stud.
>> Anonymous
>>8966
>Following a pre-draft workout with the Wizards, it has been reported that Brown told Jordan or then-Wizards coach Doug Collins "if you draft me, you'll never regret it."
>> Anonymous
>>8978
STEPHEN A. Must be laughing his ass off
>> Anonymous
bump for greatness
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to beat SEC.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to actually be able to play
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to have healthy non-injured players.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach us how to be a good hockey team
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Tech me how to beat Montreal.
>> Anonymous
>>9349
*teach
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to beat the Rangers this season
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to be entertaining.
>> MrWardy44
>>9349
Alex Auld definitely needs the lessons too.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to not get suspended
>> Anonymous
>>9358
impossible

it's soccer
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to be a good analyst.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to get out of jail.
>> Anonymous
>>10090
LOLOLOL
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to save a 2 run lead in the bottom of the 13th inning.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to lose my job to a third string quarterback.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win in the playoffs.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to start a winning streak.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to not violate NCAA rules.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to draft.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to retire.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to graduate.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me the Razorback's chant.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to act.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>10156
HE WAS AWESOME IN ONE TREE HILL!
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to win basketball game
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to make sports games.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to turn right
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to trade franchise player for nothing
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>10327
ok
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to be A MAN
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how not to be a pussy.
>> Anonymous
>>10343
He used to be so good....
>> Anonymous
>>10343
other running turn into a superstar cause of the offensive line. FUCKING IF BARRY SANDER HAS HIS OFFENSIVE LINE 3000 YARDS PER SEASON.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to sell superbowl tickets.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to be black.
>> Anonymous
fucking 3 days thread is not deleted yet? this is why /sp/ will be dead before the nba playoffs.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to hit in the playoffs
>> Anonymous
>>10390
how about you get out, faggot
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to quarterback
>> Anonymous
>>10390

its because people are still posting stupid fucking bitch
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to start other positions than 5 shooting guards.
>> Anonymous
>>10378
fucking lol'd
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to troll
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to make up my mind
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to not bite a towel
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to build muscles.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to stay healthy.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to be a soldier.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to kill franchises
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me when to call a timeout.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to get drunk
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>10806
k lol
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me work ethic
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>10811

I need some of that too
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me when to call a timeout
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to stay alive.
>> Anonymous
>>10821
A dead athlete is like a dead soldier man. At least pay some respects.
>> Anonymous
>>10821
holy shit ended with 21
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>10820
k
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to find a job.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
teach me how to stay with one team
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to pass up Adrian Peterson.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to walk again
>> Anonymous
>>10824
HOW THE FUCK IS A DEAD ATHLETE LIKE A DEAD SOLDIER?
>> Anonymous
>>10979
Pat Tillman
>> Anonymous
>>10979
if you play at miami you are a soldier i guess.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to play offense
>> Anonymous
>>10988
tilman is a dead soldier
taylor is a dead athlete

BIG FUCKING DIFFRENCE
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Teach me how to resign my core players.
>> Anonymous
>>10401

winner. close thread.
>> Anonymous
>>10821
THATS NOT FUNNY MY BROTHER DIED THAT WAY
>> Anonymous
>>11782

BOOM LEGSHOT
>> Red Machine D !h1LZxECEVA
>>11847

I shouldn't have lol'd at that.