File :-(, x, )
TRUE STORY JUST HAPPENED TODAY Anonymous
IT FUCKING WORKED.

Okay, first off, let me just say I'm a fat loser. I'm 19, I've never had a girlfriend, I'm shy, etc. I've been living at my aunts' house for the past year. My mother has been having health issues, and I really get along with my younger cousin. So here I am. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened until recently.

This last week my Aunt has been acting quite 'comfortable' around me. In the mornings she walks around in her panties and no bra, just a white shirt. Despite the fact it's colder this time of year. She makes small references about me being a "man", and at least daily she'll knock on the door when I'm in the bathroom, just to ask a stupid question.
>> Anonymous
It's all been making me more horny than usual, so I decided to make a "move." It's really covert and pathetic, but I decided to knock on the door while she was showering and pretend I have to take a shit. Then, we would be together in the bathroom for like 5 mins, while I pretend to shit. I had my iphone, and I was going to pretend i was listening to it, actually taking shitty shots of her through the shower curtain, without actually facing that way.

She was done with the shower WAY too fucking quickly, and told me to look away while she got her towel. My heart started pumping, and I decided to give it a shot. She swung the curtain open further than was appropriate, and my face darted away, but I held my iphone at the same position, slightly skewing it. Looking away, I took a photo with my iphone.

She's obviously being innapropriate with me, but she saw me look away. She has no idea I grabbed this photo. I've just been wanking to it all day. I've never known a woman in person, and seen her naked. This is so fucking hot.
>> newfag who sucks cock
dude tap that shit! (if its real)
>> Anonymous
man the harpoons!
>> Anonymous
And before anyone says it, yes, I know I'm pathetic. And I know she's not that hot. But this is a big deal for me.
>> Anonymous
yeah its big alright.
>> Anonymous
I....I can't tell you how much I hate you, OP. I wanted to read a hot story and have you say 'pic unrelated', cause that woman is about as attractive as a piece of Iraqi shit lying out in the desert to bake.
But now....now I can't fap for the rest of the night. Thank you good sir, and now please die in hell.
>> Anonymous
earings in the shower?
>> Anonymous
>>318605
>>318609
Steal some of her sexy panties and cum in them. take pictures!
>> Anonymous
you realize fat women have a terrible odor right??
>> Anonymous
that thing is gross.

i wouldn't fuck it.
>> Anonymous
look dude just fuck round with her, next time try to get a boner or something and get her to look at it to see whats her reaction, don't make it all obvious that you want her to see your boner but let her have a good look at it it might work it has worked for me plenty of times with shy girls and family
>> Anonymous
>>318617

Read the disclaimer, I know I'm pathetic and she's not hot. At least I'm sharing, which is more than you have.

Are you a soldier or something? Haha.
>> Anonymous
Dude, you're standing up in this photo. According to your story you should be sitting down. And no moron STANDS UP to look away.

Failtroll.
>> Anonymous
looks like there was a flash, she would've noticed
>> Anonymous
>>318632

Two sources of light too...the yellow ambient overhead light, and the BRIGHT WHITE FUCKING FLASH.

OP fails.
>> Anonymous
>>318622
This one won't because she showers!!!
>> Anonymous
lol op fails so hard
>> Anonymous
>>318639
The smell comes from the insides.
>> Anonymous
no /hc/
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
this is a hotter tubby-tubby.
>> Anonymous
>>318656
fuck, remindes me of my ex.

fuck.
>> Anonymous
iPhones don't have a flash, you dipshit troll.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
It might be a troll, might not. The second light could be the sink's light.
>> Anonymous
If she looks good with makeup and isn't crazy enough to tell your mother I'd say fuck the bitch. She probably doesnt get sex ever so she'll let you do whatever you want to her.
>> Anonymous
>>318756
Whatever it is, i'll be better for him to make sports, meet people and have a real life with a girl who will be more sexable.
>>318774
lowl
>> Anonymous
oh my fucking GOD, be this a troll than I am good and trolled. make a blog and keep us updated WE COMMAND IT
>> Anonymous
BUMP please come back OP
>> Anonymous
Hair isnt wet?
>> Anonymous
BUMP, WHERE IS MOAR OP?
>> Anonymous
Ugh, I wasn't sure what to expect when I posted this, but I didn't think it would be all this bullshit.

If you think I'm lying, just sage and ignore the thread.

Everyone else: I know I'm going to have to make the next move. She has no idea I took the pic, or that I am interested. Thing is, I'm really afraid to do anything. Same way that I clam up in front of girls and am a social retard. I need to think up something that is clearly a "move", but so slight that I have the guts to actually do it.
>> Anonymous
>>318808
write a note, its easy. take a screen of the note so we can see too.

also START A BLOG or a twitter or something. we may lose this forever if 404
>> Anonymous
Okay, now first of all: THE LIFE IS FUCKING SHORT. So don't waste your precious time being shy. I was somewhat like you until I realized it, when I was like 14 or something. Second: the woman in the pic sucks. For John Romero's sake, get a young girl at least. The whale in the pic is just about to collapse in grease and cracks -.- Also her face is as scary as her ass probably is. Now ALT+Q this and go get a life or something. If you wanna do a "next move", "move" away from that shitload of crap.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
>>318810

Dude, if you like the content, take a screencap. I WANT this shit to go away eventually... why would I preserve an online record of me being perverted about my aunt?

A note? That she could show to people? What it would say? She's been coy and flirty, without being overt. I need to do something like that. Maybe I'll start by holding my gaze when I talk to her for a second too long. I don't know how this shit works. But a note sounds like I am trying to romance her or something.
>> Anonymous
I'd fuck her. If she's being that flirty with YOU, she's probably into all kinds of nasty fucking... THAT, kids, is what makes a woman remain hot when she gets older and her body goes in this direction.

I know, yeah yeah, harpoons, you only fuck supermodels, your gf will never get fat, etc etc... but you'll remember this when you're 40 and your wife is fat and dumpy, but DOESN'T let you do all kinds of nasty things...
>> Anonymous
>>318820

/hc/ - motivational speaking
>> Anonymous
>>318823
all i want is to know im not being totally trolled or if i am some justification to as to why i believed it. perhaps a note isnt the way, to make it more clear you are 'looking' at her
>> Anonymous
doesn't matter how horny she is since she can't get a man's dick stiff.
>> Anonymous
>>318830

You don't know that - she might be a fuckin' MASTER at hand jobs.
>> Anonymous
>>318833
or blowjobs. op this is actually hot. and to bait us witha pic and never do any more is cruel
>> Anonymous
Also, dude, you probably don't want to remember for the rest of your wasted existence that you ever got laid with that monster @ the top of the page.
>> Anonymous
>>318836
itd feel good, dont listen to this fag op
>> Anonymous
>>318836

Dude, the story alone would be WORTH IT.

enjoy your hand.
>> Anonymous
>>318605
if she lets you go into the room while she showers and all such things, I bet there is a chance of you dicking her

I mean she probably realized you didn't really take a dump when you just sat there not doing anything that sounded like farting or pooping.
>> Anonymous
I'd hit that, even if it was my aunt.

Just leave the door open whenever your showering or changing clothes, sooner or later she'll walk in on you.

Things add up and before you know, you'll have you're auntie riding your dick reverse cowgirl, bouncing that ass all up in your face.
>> Anonymous
>>318836
sorry man but "I had hot steamy dirty forbidden sex with my old aunt" sure beats the "I got a nice girlfriend I really love and we had romantic sex in the missionary position"
>> Anonymous
>>318845
FUCK YEAH *high fives*
>> Anonymous
Anyone have any idea on moves that I can make. I want a move that will make her think I *might* be returning her advances, but without 100% certainty.

Basically I'm paranoid that I'm reading too deeply into things, and she isn't interested in me. I'm also paranoid that she is messing with me expressly because she doesn't expect me to do anything back, and the moment I do, she'll tell my uncle or something.
>> Anonymous
So your gonna lose your V to that ugly whale, LOL?
>> Anonymous
>>318852
go whole hog. use a note man! dont worry if you are too deep shed be waaay to embarased to ever show it
>> Anonymous
>>318859

Dude, what the fuck would I say? "I know you're my aunt but you're hot and I spanked to this perverted picture of you."
>> Anonymous
>>318852

simple, next time she makes some sort of sexual advance/innuendo/joke/etc laugh and say "cut it out, you're making me horny/hard". If she wants it, she'll let u know right then and there. If not, you can act like you were telling your blood relative to quit arousing you. Problem solved.
>> Anonymous
walk around in boxers, have your wang stick out the slit, let her see, depending on her reaction you stick it in her or act all embarrassed
>> noko Anonymous
Dude next time she walk around you in the bra and panties. just keep looking at her and she'll notice, and she might even notice your boner then she's playin with your dick then she'll let you enter her. P.S. I'll hit that shit and you should too
>> Anonymous
>>318863
>>simple, next time she makes some sort of sexual advance/innuendo/joke/etc

She's never made advances or innuendos. Her cues are more nuanced. That's why I think I might be wrong about the whole thing.

>>318869

I think you read too much erotica. Just the thought of doing that makes me incredibly nervous. Plus I have a small dick. I'm fat, remember?
>> Anonymous
>>318882
so is she, doesn't matter

if she wants you for real then because you're younger than her man and probably because it is kinky etc

just how normal is it to let someone else into the bathroom in your family? that might make things more easy to dissect for us

also why is she in the bathroom in your house? I just now realized htat, she live with you or what?
>> Anonymous
I'm going to bed for tonight, bye /hc/
>> I GOT THIS
...why does it look like the OP's pic was taken with a flash
WHEN THE IPHONE DOES NOT HAVE A FLASH.

picture quality seems suspect.
>> Anonymous
>>318893
third op sentence, you idiot.
>> Anonymous
>>318899
very good point. there is definitely a cast shadow behind her.

Story is false. Plus, no one is a big enough asshat to want to fuck their old aunt.
>> Anonymous
ITT: cesspool rejects
>> Anonymous
Dude for Real: Send a few compliments her way, tell her how good she looks. If she takes to it, play it up a little and then tell her you couldn't help but look and you liked what you say. Women love flattery, no matter how stupid it sounds, especially older women. Dude if I were in your shoes, I would play the field a little "sounds like she is already", see how it goes. If it all seems to fall into place, go for it. She'll never say fuck all, too much at stake if she did. So, enjoy! I know I would.
>> Anonymous
>>318656

MOAR!!
>> Anonymous
if youre too much of a pussy to take our advice, dont ask for it...
>> Anonymous
so why is she grabbing a towel off the sink if you handed it to her?

fail troll fails
>> Anonymous
Read the story moron, he never claimed to grab the towel for her you fucking ass clown. And dude.... fuck the hell out of her and paint the walls of her pussy creamy white.
>> Anonymous
The ONLY way I'd fuck that fat bitch is immediately after a cleansing shower. She better smell like a summer day before I lay a prick on her. Fat ass ho.
>> pockyninja
just fall on her and put it in. thats the best ur going to get
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
let her catch u jerking off LOL
>> Anonymous
OP go take a picture of the bathroom now. If you deliver my years of incest advice will be given.
>> Anonymous
>>318622

Not if they shower regularly and don't have any infections.
>> Anonymous
Reminds me of the monster from Cloverfield...
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>319033
>> Anonymous
yuck dude...yuck
>> Anonymous
>>319038
The monster from Cloverfield was a giant General Grievous?
>> Anonymous
no no no no no stop right here right now you are the scum of the world not because you took a picture of your nasty ass aunt but because you weren't creeped out by her when she was making a move on you something this disgusting and this repulsive should not turn anyone on not even her husband if she has one, by something im not talking about the picture i'm tlaking about this fucking disgusting fat ass whore of a woman you call your aunt..
dear god i hope you are trolling because anything more than trolling is completely fucked in all aspects i am in no way creeped out by some kid trying to get with his aunt but when some one gets this amount of attraction out of something that hideous they must have a chemical imbalance in their brain
>> Anonymous
That is your aunt. Your mothers sister. Your family.

Dude. Ok, look. Just give it a shot and go out and find someone OUT of your family.

Girls exist that will like you.

And you prolly have a small cock, which some girls like.

Don't try shit with your aunt. That's fucking gross.

I lost the game.

Row row, go fuck yourself.
>> Anonymous
awesome story!

it's a shame your aunt is terrible looking.
>> Anonymous
Well, my aunts are hot. So I can sort of feel what's going on.
>> Anonymous
this is the lulziest thread I've seen on HC
>> Anonymous
eww ugly
>> Anonymous
Umm, the most immediately obvious things have already been stated; leave a door slightly ajar when you're changing, is the most sound bet as y'can pass it off as accidental or whatever.

Why not take a shower when she's about and leave the bathroom door ajar? Not so that you're necessarily visible, but more so that it's obvious the door is open and you're bawls naked in there. Just keep an eye on the door for any suspicious lurking.

Even better, take a shower and "forget" your towel, then call her to bring you one ;-).

Keep this shit updated OP, and take no notice of all the elitistfag jerkoffs.
>> Anonymous
1. print out the pic
2. blow your steamy load on it
3. leave it on her pillow
4. ???????????
5. PROFIT
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
>>319351
This man is good, listen to him.

Also, OP, I have a feeling she may be into you, let's face it, she's an older woman, everyone knows they are kinky as hell, she's just as afraid as you are, hence why she is using hints like "references about me being a "man"" .. she walks around topless? she let you walk in on her taking a shower, sure she pretended she didn't want you to see her, but she knows you did something sneaky, she's probably getting wet over you right now
>> Anonymous
OP, you have to hit her, she wants it and can't make it anymore obvious.

DO IT FAGGOT
>> bread with holes
dude tear her apart, imagine the fun you would have like everyday. come home from whatever and there she is those tits out and finger in her pussy. just fucking walk in on her while shes changing and be like ooo im so sorry. then the heavens will play 70's porno music and you will be laid. DO IT.
>> Anonymous
>then the heavens will play 70's porno music and you will be laid.

I lawled.
>> Anonymous
She's your aunt, that's sick. Lose some weight and join internet dating services ffs if you have to.
>> Anonymous
that's not your aunt, that's a porn star
>> Anonymous
sage for personal interest
>> Anonymous
The photo is taken from an elevated position. OP fails.
>> Anonymous
>>318605

What scares me? I'm pretty sure this is my neighbors daughter and considering the oldest nephew is all of 10. This is from her ex-boyfriend's photo collection.
>> Anonymous
>>318950
He never said he handed her the towel asswipe.