File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Hey /hc/, I'm about to fuck myself in the ass for the first time in the shower tonight.

Any tips?

Also, the object I will be using does not have a rounded tip. The end is almost identical to the flat side of a nickel. Will I bleed?
>> Anonymous
(USER WAS BLAND FOR THIS BOAST)
>> Anonymous
>>102026

It's not a boast, I'm just afraid of things getting messy.
>> Anonymous
>>102011

No. As long as you use enough shampoo to lube go ahead and ream away. It will burn a little a first but it is your asshole getting used to it.
>> Anonymous
Use a rubber mallet or hammer handle, cover it with a lubed condom, and use a rubber band to keep the condom in place.

Hammers (rubber mallets are the best because they're lighter) are great because you can really hold on to the head part and jack away!

Also works for the vag.
>> Anonymous
>>102034
>>102029

I plan on leaving it in while I jerk off. Will it feel as good as expected? Or should I just go with the anal?
>> Anonymous
don't use shampoo as lube. that'll be uncomfortable.
>> Anonymous
I doubt you will bleed, even if you do the bleeding will stop quickly.

The only way you'll die is if you fuck a horse like MrHands did. But other than that, be sure you have various objects of differing widths in case what you are using is too small or too big.
>> Anonymous
And remember, it's not gay unless balls are touching.
>> Anonymous
You know those cylindrical containers for toothbrushes? That + condom = ONE GOOD FUCK
>> Anonymous
I NEED TIPS ALSOS DAD DS<F SD"FS"FKS OFS}KDOF KS|OF
>> Anonymous
Personally, i just used a toothbrush.
Although this was while i was in a bath, and i moved the showermat a little so that there was a bump in it, and i placed the toothbrush against that, so i could fap and move up and down the bath at the same time.

Good fucking times.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
OP here.

Well, I just finished my first anal session. It went alright I guess? I chickened out and only got about 3-4 inches inside me. I used a pencil and the handle of some toy that's about as thick as a crayola marker. I used the pencil first (eraser side) to try and make it easier for the handle thing. I felt every push forward and made a tingly sensation similar to the one you get when you need to take a shit. It didn't really feel like anything while I was pushing it in, but when I stopped, and jiggled the pencil around, it was mildly arousing. It was a lot different from penis arousal, I'll give it that.

Next came the handle. Pushing it in felt like trying to push something against rubber, the friction was terrible. I squirted some soft (baby) soap on it and tried again. This made the process MUCH easier. It felt like I WAS taking a shit. As soon as I chickened out, the handle started to push out my ass like a log of shit, and it literally felt like I was going to blow a load of manure out my ass. Only the marker came out. Although, there were small scrapes of feces on the top. They weren't any bigger than the dirt you'd find on your nails. I rubbed it off. And the marker/pencil didn't smell afterwards either. I didn't go in and out because I'm a pussy.

Afterward, I got the pencil back inside me and tried the thrusting motion. It felt okay, but is NOT worth the fear/nervousness.

I switched back to the handle, and started jerking off. I came pretty fast, and, I don't know if this is normal or not, but I felt a sort of dizziness after climaxing.

My conclusion? The pencil felt better jiggling inside my ass than going in and out. The larger object was threatening. Lube IS DEFINITELY required. Am I going to stop masturbating normally? No. Am I going to try anal again? Maybe. But it definitely has not been worth the effort.

PS. AMIDOINITRITE?
>> Anonymous
>>102116

Don't use a pencil.

Avoid shit that can break off in your ass.

Try to get something with a flared end to avoid entry.
>> Anonymous
>>102120

Flared end? Avoid entry? What?
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>102122

Check this shit out. If you fall on your ass, it's not getting lost in there.

Granted, I use highlighters and shit, because I'm a cheap fuck. Just throwing this out there, though.

But srsly, don't use a pencil. I try to avoid items that can break apart under any circumstances.
>> Anonymous
>>102122

Also, can you really cum from just anal masturbation? Or is that just false advertising? And if so, how deep do you have to go/ how do you know if you hit the right spot?
>> anonymous
use the handle of a screwdriver, feels great
>> Anonymous
you should've made a pic!!!!
>> Anonymous
>>102126

Of course you can, if you can cum just by thought alone, you must be able to.
(i have btw, lol toothbrush)
>> Anonymous
>>102126
>>Also, can you really cum from just anal masturbation?

I've cum from just getting ass fucked.

I recommend anal orgasms highly
>> Anonymous
Ok here's what i like sometimes....

Find yourself something a good thickness you know you can cope with, thats about maybe 12"/30cm long (dont worry its not going all the way in), get on all fours, doggy style, under your duvet (important!). Now, using lube, or whatever, however you like it, fuck your own ass with your makeshift dildo and have a great time, once its comfortably in, leave it hanging out a couple of inches but mostly in, and sticking upright so your duvet rests on it. The weight of the duvet holds it in without pushing too far, unless you move. The beauty of it? By rocking back and forth, you can fuck yourself in the ass, doggy style with two free hands, and jack off to a brilliant finish! and, no other men involved so its not gay! Also its on all fours, so i feel like a slut while i'm doinit.

I fuckin love it.
>> Anonymous
Buy a dildo you damned underagers. I remember doing markers and shit though. Not gay, just like some stimulation on occassion.
>> Anonymous
>>102157
>>Also its on all fours, so i feel like a slut while i'm doinit.

I lol'd
>> Anonymous
A bar of soap works well. Use a brand new bar if possible. Work up a good lather and spread it all over your ass. Then shove the soap in. Do it quick so you don't have time to chicken out. If you find it difficult to push the soap in, set it on the floor of the tub and sit on it. Don't be afraid to use all your weight. You'll have an anal orgasm in no time.
>> Anonymous
and you'll be able to fart bubbles :P
>> Anonymous
>>102157
#
Hot
>> Anonymous
ITT: Its gay even if the only balls involved are yours.
>> Anonymous
>>102157
I'll definitely try that sometime. Does anybody else have any tips like that?
>> Anonymous
/r/ing moar first time anal stories
>> Anonymous
>>102226

I was about 13-14, used a pen or something like that, while wearing my mothers/sisters underwear, heels and clothes. doggy style with my legs tied together ... was amazing.
>> Anonymous
>>102157
Imma try that tomorrow!
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
This guy's alright.
>> Anonymous
once i put my finger into my anus. didin't feel much. should i try something bigger? is it really worth the mess?
>> Anonymous
Go for the prostate. It is worth the mess.
>> Anonymous
aren't you guys afraid that doing this regularly will cause incontinence or something?
>> Anonymous
>>102258
Since it's messy and time consuming, you won't really do it too often. Once a week can't hurt.
>> Anonymous
whats a good tip to having an anal orgasm?
like, whats the best technique, ive trying mucking about and it felt good, but not an orgasm good.
>> Anonymous
>>102273
i just try to find the right spot, and hit it repeatedly. usually can't locate it, but when i do it's divine
>> Anonymous
>>102279

and how can one find this special spot?
>> be careful Philgus
fucking yourself in the ass could be like this

http://kewlup.net/src/1210302419786.jpg
>> Anonymous
Anything else work as lube?
>> Anonymous
Oh god, just don't stick a shampoo bottle over your cock and try use it as a suction device.
I just done so in the bath there, and i think i fucked up my penis somehow, it hurts when i pee...
>> Anonymous
>>102293

Some sort of moisturizer.
>> Anonymous
>>102293

saliva is fine too
>> anonymous
You could just use water and do it in the tub or shower. Don't use anything soapy, it causes irritation. Some good lubes you can find around the house, olive oil is very slippery and doesn't contain any "bad stuff", an egg is a bit more messy but also works well.
>> Anonymous
damn you lol I finally stopped fucking myself and now I want to do it again!
>> Anonymous
>>102367
You're not the only one. I love fuckin my arse, but I usually only do it when I'm really horny.
>> Anonymous
Just buy a dildo. The only reason I don't is because my roommate would find at some point and things would be all bad, and even then all I do without one is fingers anyway.
>> Anonymous
>>102386
I would buy myself a dildo, but I haven't found a good one that I want. I'd want it to straight and long with a suction cup on the end so I can stick it to the shower wall.
>> Anonymous
I've tried and although I can understand why people do it I can't say that I was very impressed with it. I can't get excited about the thought of having sex with another guy either, maybe it would have helped to fantasize about it otherwise? *shrug*

Two things I did learn though, size DOES matter and faggots who get pummeled in their asses by huge dicks are fucking crazy.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>102389
I get the feeling a straight and long dildo isn't such a great idea.
>> Anonymous
>>102399
Not too long, around 8" or so. Something not too long, but not too short.
>> Anonymous
>>102389
Something like this then?
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=11059
(search any toys site for 'suction', does the job)
>> Anonymous
>>102404
Something similar to that yeah, but with a smaller base would be my preference.