List of groundbreaking innovations* Autoplaying video clips in profile that never work properly and have to spend 5 minutes disabling.* Autoplaying music which inevitably starts by surprise at maximum volume.* Eye-searing color schemes that makes people's text impossible to read, and you'll have to highlight everything in order to read it easier but then realize that it's all shit nobody cares about.* Dialup User Patience Initiative - the bigger the whore, the more hours the page will take to load on dialup.* Sitewide custom of sending friends requests to strangers without ever contacting the person beforehand.* People pretending to be television or movie characters, which has never been done before anywhere.* People who add fake television or movie characters to their friends list and say "OMG lewk I em phreands with Morpheus LOLZORZ OMG!!!!!!!!!!!111* Is always b0rked when you want to use it. Always.* Patented "browser crash upon visit" technology.* Fun "click the stop button" game on every visit!* Fun lack of vertical scaling for thumbnails - have longcat as your avatar and piss your friends off!* Unwanted Spam!!1!!!one!1* People who fail at knowing whats funny and what is no longer funny. E.g. '!!!111oneone' is no longer funny, yet at least one hundred members of myspace still continue to use it as a means of getting cyber-laid after fellow camwhores see that they have used the outdated humour, and still find it rather lulz, but it really isnt lulz. srsly oneoneone was so two years ago.Comment too long. Clickhereto view the full text.
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Okay that's not where his penis would even be if he was jerking off. So I'm just assuming he's jerking off some guy who's lying down next to him.
Or ripping off his dick.
lol
absolute win.