File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Alright, /fit/, let me give you the rundown: I'm a 5'11, 210 pound male; former pimple on society's ass that spent 3 straight years doing nothing but browse 4chan. Now, I'm working 9 hours a day, on the night shift. I'm a chain smoker, too. Recently, I've decided to start living a healthier lifestyle.

In other words, I've only about 12 hours of free time a day (takes about an hour and a half to and from work), much of it is during the wrong hours to exercise. (I'm home at around 7:30 AM, too fucking tired to do running or whatever. You're supposed to exercise in the morning, right?) And even if that wasn't the case, I have like, zero stamina because of the cancer sticks. I also know jack shit about proper eating.

I'm totally lost, /fit/. Show me the way.
>> Anonymous
OP here. Forgot to note the relevance of only having 12 hours of free time a day. I need at least 6 of those for sleep, and I just can't stop spending the other 6 online or just lazing around like the loser I am. What the fuck do I do?
>> Anonymous
You will get nowhere no matter what we tell you, just based on the sole fact that you have come to /fit/ first and foremost for advice.
>> Anonymous
>>85755
;_;
>> Anonymous
oh hai, every post is repost repost.
>> Anonymous
No more soda, no fast food ever, eat alot of protein, alot of fruit and vegetables, buy a treadmill, drink less beer and if you must drink light beer,
>> Anonymous
>>85779
>No more soda
No problem.

>no fast food ever
Sure.

>eat alot of protein
Could you be a bit more specific, please?

>alot of fruit and vegetables
Got it

>buy a treadmill
Can't. Broke.

>drink less beer and if you must drink light beer
Yeah, alright.

Anything else? I'm sure there's much more.
>> Anonymous
oh wow, what the hell is this board doing here? I thought if you weren't morbidly obese they'd revoke your 4chan gold account.

what sort of sick joke is this shit
>> Anonymous
ITT: i feel bad cause i'm a fat lazy unhealthy shit. give me helpful suggestions so i can come up with an excuse not to do it so i feel better about the fact i'm out of shape, and blame it on my circumstance.

just fucking die, you clearly don't want to get in better shape.
>> Anonymous
re: "supposed to exercise in the morning" would apply to after you wake up, the ideo being that it's the only time you're fasting for that long (because you're eating at least every three hours while you're awake). whether or not it actually makes any difference is debatable, but the idea isn't that it's best to exercise while the sun's coming up.
>> Anonymous
>>85876

speaks the truth.

In my experience of "useless slob --> somewhat healthy-ish", the best is having a on/off schedule.

If you don't want to leave the house (like me) then once you wake up, stay awake [fap, 4chon, then stretch) then start with doing 20 4-count jumping jacks, 5 4-count crunches, 5 4-count pushups (girly kind even, if you can't do them proper) - Doing "X" 4 count anything, tricks your mind into thinking your doing less. Its also VERY good to actually count to yourself, cos you can easily do less/more if you don't, and its good to progress.

then 'mountain climbers'- crouch down and make a inverted "V" shape with your hands and legs, then start running with your legs while your hands stay stationary [lazy man-burpees] http://www.rosstraining.com/articles/burpeeclip.htm
then lay on your back with your hands under your ass and put your legs up 6 inches- now start moving them up and down like you were doing the back-stroke (flutter kicks)

you can also throw in some of these

http://exercise.about.com/od/abs/ss/abexercises_4.htm

on the next day, run in place, do more mountain climbers, ANYTHING to keep your heart-rate up. If you don't want to run, get on a bike or something.

=) I stole some links from 7chan's FAQ thread, but i think this is better for total newbs.

Now excuse me, i'm goin to put my money where my mouth is and work out for half-an-hour =)
>> Anonymous
http://www.flat-stomach-exercises.com/ab-crunches.html


there you go fatty
>> Anonymous
>>85925
You realise spot reduction doesn't work yeah?