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Anonymous
/fit/, I was watching some informertial a few nights ago, and I got pretty scared. I usually just ignore them, especially the medical ones, but it was related to some colon cleansing thing. Of course, I'm not interested in the product at all, especially since so many people say it's bullshit, but it got me reminded of something. The guy said that there's old shit that never got out of our colons, and people who used the product lost a few lb from the shit.

Now, this is how it may be related to me. When I was around eight, I didn't take a shit for a month. I am not kidding. For the first two weeks or so, I had very little shit, and for the other two weeks, I didn't even shit at all. I didn't tell my mother or anything, but it was because my shit hurt my asshole, so I was scared. My brother had become a diabetic around that time though, so I started having diet drinks a lot. So, when my mother found out that I hadn't taken a shit in so long, she said we're going to the hospital. I got scared, so I decided to just try. Surprisingly, it came out pretty soft. There was so much shit, that it just kept stacking on and on, and came at least three inches out of the water. Basically, a mini-mountain of shit. My doctor also said the diet drink had something to do with the poop softening, which is why I mentioned that earlier. Anyway, age eight was the year I started to become fat. I continued to gain weight, and right now, I'm in the process of losing it. Now, I've always told people my weight, and I compared myself with people who were my weight and my height, but sometimes usually taller. For some reason, I didn't look as fat as them, though I sometimes just said that it was because my fat was distributed better. Now I'm thinking, is there some extra poundage of ancient shit in my colon? Even if it's not, should I get my colon checked? I mean, a month of not shitting, man... Thinking back on it, I'm surprised I didn't get some disease.
>> ?suomynonA?
>is there some extra poundage of ancient shit in my colon?
no
>> Anonymous
As a person making money off your gullibility, yes, go get a colon cleanse. It really works.
>> rowerfag
if you'r REALLY worried, go get an enema.... but you really do not have old shit floating around in your large intestine...
>> Anonymous
>>68221

that is ridiculous
>> Anonymous
You know how your ears get full of earwax over time, but it's not really that big a deal? Probably that.
>> Anonymous
Colon cleansing products are just shitloads of fiber and other ingredients like clay that turn your shit black.
You eat the monstrous amount of fiber and it turns into a gel in your gut. When you shit this stuff out it is black and in the shape of your colon because thats where it was set last.
People keep "cleansing" because the black shit in the shape of their colon keeps coming out, so there must be more plaque buildup in there right?
Really its the product that put it there in the first place.
>> Anonymous
>>68221
go for another month without shitting. If you had that large a shit after a month when you were 8 imagine how big your shit would be if you went for another month without shitting now.
film that shit and post it on youtube
>> Anonymous
Man, not shitting for a few weeks is terrible. I used to have trouble with bowel movements when I was younger, and it made shitting almost unbearable. All you have to do, OP, is get regular. In a few months, your body will eventually cleanse itself. People forget how fucking amazing the body is at fixing its own problems, and go to these fad cures. They don't work and harm more than help. If you want to get regular, eat some fiber products (not a ton), and take a book or a GameBoy to the can. I happen to have a laptop, which rocks. GameBoy actually helped me fix my system when I was younger, though. Take a shit every day at the same time, or around the same time. Sometimes you won't be able to, but then you just wait until you can later that day. Eventually, your body will be clean and you'll feel healthier, and probably shed a couple pounds because your metabolism will start adapting to it.
>> Anonymous
funny op is funny

also for my height according to generic bmi charts and such, i should be obese. i have some extra fat on my belly sure but i don't look fat at all. i'm pretty well muscled from lots of wrestling/physical labor and have a solid bone structure so that's probably it.