File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
why cant i be a man and go up to the cashier and ask for help? i cant order pizza over the phone and i cant look people in the eye when i talk. im shy as fuck and when i see old "friends" i get nervous and i start to shake and sweat. its terrible. i really hate it. whats wrong with me /fit/ and what should i do about it?

inb4 an hero
>> Anonymous
>>481448
same here OP
Just keep doing it, don't care about what other people think.

Put yourself in those situations more often. Order pizza, talk to the cashier, look people in the eye.
Keep doing it and you'll get better at it.

I've gotten a lot better than before
>> Anonymous
Same here, OP.

Sounds like Social Anxiety Disorder. Try reading 'What You Must Think of Me.' It helped me a lot.
>> Anonymous
>>481466
see, thing is im VERY self conscious. and im not fat or ugly but i just feel like they're judging me while im conversing with them..its fucking weird. i dont know how i got this way. it sucks.
>> Anonymous
>>481473
ill check it out. =/
>> Anonymous
>>481475

Sounds like social anxiety disorder to me, spot on...
>> Anonymous
I used to be like this, then I got over it with pure willpower. Just realize how illogical you are being.
>> Anonymous
what should i do about it?
>> Anonymous
>>481525

what you should do is realize that, well, most people really dont care about you as much as you worry about them caring about you...

consider this, can anyone possibly judge you as much as you currently judge yourself?
>> Anonymous
holy fuck not another one of these threads. just take the meds and stfu, you suck.
>> test !khlSMh/9k6
propanolol ftw
>> Anonymous
>>481475
eh, so you'd like to be friends with people who don't talk to you or what?
>> Anonymous
Get a job that forces you to interact. shit works.
>> Anonymous
>>481728
i HAD friends. i was good at conversing in high school then when i dropped out i became a hermit. im just fucking embarrassed about EVERYTHING! (i.e. shopping, answering/asking questions, phone calls etc. etc.)

my moms offering to take me to a psychologist...im still thinking it over.
>> Anonymous
>>481915
>my moms offering to take me to a psychologist
Do it. Make eye contact with him though.
>> Anonymous
>>481920
why? o_o
>> Anonymous
OP you sound like me, read up on social anxiety disorder

i'm going to the psychologist this week, i've been dealing with this shit for 20 years and i've had enough
>> Anonymous
>>481929
already did, and like i said before my mom offered to take me to a psychologist. and im not sure i want to go, im terrified.
D:
>> Anonymous
>>481933
>im terrified.

me too
however
drugs will make us happy
>> Anonymous
I was the same way. Eventually some guy told me to stop being a pussy and speak up.
:/

I still hate talking to people, but I don't do it like a pussy any more.
>> Anonymous
>>481938
hahah, fuck. well, i suppose ill go. it cant be that bad...just go in and get it over with i guess. >_<
>> Anonymous
>>481517
This. I used to be extremely shy, didn't talk to anyone and always stared at the ground and shit. Then I realized what a total retard I was and I got over it with practice in social interacting and willpower.

Tl;dr stop being a pussy and get over it.
>> Anonymous
>>481517
>>481517
>>481517
This is the way.
I always imagined what others would think of me. Sure it isn't the best way to look at things. Whenever I saw someone that never looked me in the eye and always had their head held down I would think "Damn, I don't wanna be that guy" I wanted to be an open person or at least friendly when I meet or talk to people I normally do not.

Go for it OP, nothing to lose.
>> Anonymous
>>482191
go for what? go to the psychologist? or just stop being a wuss?

yes..OP here..still keepin an eye on this thread. anymore help would be appreciated.
>> Anonymous
>>482203

You just ahve to realize that deep down everyone else is just as scarred as you are. If you let your feelings dominate your life your just a slave. Do you want to have a life you lead or other people lead? People will use your weakness for their gain.

Now go say hi to 100 strangers. Just start with hi. If they keep talking thats fucking great. Don't think about what's going to come next, young and old. Just go to the mall. Say hi. That's it. Groups of people too.

Even though you are a complete stranger on the internet I will do it with you, tonight when I go out I will say hi to everyone I see. I am just as scarred as you are. I am not that great at talking to people but I'm fucking tired of living a closed up life.

I am sure you are too.
>> Anonymous
>>482248
im going to the movie theater later tonight with my sister, maybe ill do it. and yeah im tired of it. 16 years old man...fucking sucks hardcore.
my other sister told me this today through an IM:
take it easy...you are too young to drown in your sorrows. you have your family that cares about you...and maybe it is time to use your brain for other things. i think you are very talented and should run with that attribute. get your ged and go to college. i think you will do very well if you get out of the rut you are in.
>> Anonymous
lemme guess. you're onf ot those fit fags who talk about fat guys getting laid only cuz girls get drunk but then think that your personality (i.e. your socialy inept attitude) has nothing to do with girls being attracted to you
>> Anonymous
>16 years old man
gtfo
>> Anonymous
I'm not a doctor or anything but I know what you're going through.

It sounds to me like you have social anxiety disorder. Don't be scared by the word disorder, there's nothing wrong with you, or your brain. Basically, what you have is a problem with the way you see things - you assume people are reacting negatively to you, when they might not be acting negatively at all, or they might just be having a bad day, etc... and this is very changeable with willpower and therapy, and medication if necessary.

From what you said, I assume it's really affecting your life, so I'd go see the psychologist. What type of treatment will you be getting, or do you know yet? A type of therapy called CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), this has been proven to be pretty effective with social anxiety disorder, but even if he doesn't offer CBT, by all means give it a try.

In the meantime, you might want to look at a self-help book called The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook, Second Edition. It's excellent, and the two authors are very accomplished psychologists. It should help put things in perspective for you, and give you some guidance on what you need to do to change your life from here.

Keep in mind that lots of other people have gone through what you're going through, and you can as well. It'll probably take a lot of willpower and determination but it'll be worth it in the end.
>> Anonymous
>>482316
Ok, now for some general tips/advice...
You're only as weird or incapable or weak to others as you are in your own mind. Try not to focus so much on yourself but focus more on the people around you. If you happen to say or do something stupid, so what? Chances are the cashier wouldn't recognize you if they saw you again, and that's if you do see them again. Avoidance only makes it worse. If you're going to take a risk like going up to that cashier to ask for help, you'd probably feel more at ease doing it in a place where the consequences of "messing up" are the smallest.

Remember everyone feels shy or nervous from time to time... if you've heard of David Letterman, he hosts a talk show, where he seems really funny and outgoing, but surprisingly enough, he's painfully shy outside of the studio. Seems unexpected, right? So are a lot of other people you'd expect not to be shy. People only see what you let them see. If you walk around thinking "I'm going to say something stupid, they'll think I'm an idiot or something" then that's how people are going to see you. Therapy should help you change your thinking, and help you feel more comfortable in social situations.

That's pretty much all the helpful stuff I can think of for now. I really encourage you to pick up that book, The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook Second edition. I'll be here for another hour or two so go ahead and reply to my post if you need anything explained. I'm not a doctor or anything but I know what you're going through :)
>> Anonymous
>>482261
>16 years old man
Reported.

Enjoy your b&
>> Anonymous
to the people who just CURED THEMSELVES WITH THE FORCE OF CONCENTRATED WILLPOWER, perhaps you didn't have "social anxiety disorder," but were just shy ?

The patronizing suggestions like "you just have to realize people don't care what you do!" piss me off to no end. I'm pretty sure most people with social anxiety are AWARE THAT IT'S IRRATIONAL.

It's like telling someone with a fucking phobia of spiders or snakes or heights that they're being irrational and expecting that to cure them.
>> Anonymous
>>482337
exactly
>> Anonymous
>>482337
I'm not OP, but I experience the exact same thing, and this is so true. Sometimes I just punch myself in the fucking head, because I know it's so irrational and I don't know where these reactions are coming from! I know people doens't care, I know that it's only in my head, so why the fuck does my body react to certain situations?! makes me rage
>> Anonymous
>>482425
fourthed. I totally get it, my fears are baseless and frankly pretty fucking stupid. Thus, when I start reacting in situations a certain way it almost feels like its going on against my will. I KNOW this something stupid, yet why does it still happen as hard as I try?
>> Anonymous
Do you have BDD?
or is it simply social anxiety?
take my survey please
>>481262
>> Anonymous
OP go kill yourself, thanks.
>> Anonymous
>>482447
>>482425
>>482407
>>482337

yeah, shit is fucking wack.

My first reaction to my anxiety is always "OH FUCKING SHIT WHAT THE FUCK I DONT EVEN"

even when I know it's completely fucking retarded
>> Anonymous
>>482261
>ged

high school drop out? What are you, retarded? Sage and reported.
>> Anonymous
i have a similar problem
its not that i cant talk to people, i'm great at public speaking and shit

but i can't start a conversation with anyone, and if i do it doesnt last very long
i have nothing to talk about and usually find people to be boring
>> Anonymous
>>482507
it seemed kind of similar
>> Anonymous
i dont know do i have this disorder or am i just shy, but all the shit you said about it was the same with me.

at first i partially overcame it by watching how other people talk and act, and i did the same, with the same tone and gestures. and that was the key for me, most of the time i am reacting something that i saw.

then at one time i started reallizing that i dont really need all people to like me, cause, well, first of all i am much better then all of them, and second - fuck them all.i look at this as game.i am the main player, they are just bunch of npc, their opinion means jack shit. and i always think that i am the main person in conversation, i lead it.

this is how i somewhat cured it.

but i still cant make a decent eye contact, and not because i am afraid, but it is partially because i am not used to it, and doing so draws attention from me and mostly cause why the fuck would i want to stare in this guy eyes, there is nothing interesting or amusing in there, just a pair of dumb eye on dumb head wtf
>> Anonymous
>>482516
>i am the main player, they are just bunch of npc, their opinion means jack shit.

antisocial weeaboo faggot detected
>> Anonymous
Sweet, I didn't know other people had this as well. Not that I want more people to have it, just to hear I'm not the only one, I'm a very prideful guy and can't admit it to anyone but my closest friends.

I had got it pretty hard after I left school ~5 years ago. Went to uni, totally froze up and became introverted then dropped out since I couldn't even bare a few 2 hour lectures without thinking I had managed to piss off every single person there. Skip to 2 years later and the same shit happened.
Essentially turned into a hermit and would only go out for food, and usually got a shit load at once to stop me having to go for a good while, anything to avoid going out and (in my mind) making a fucking fool out of myself *again*.

Got a new job about 2 months ago where I talk to people all the time, and it's quite complicated stuff so I'm always asking my colleagues for advice. The forced social interaction was fucking terrifying when I applied (needed the money bad) and I'm constantly on the phone helping people that call in, all the things my lifestyle was dedicated to avoiding.

Somehow all that fear has been shown how powerless it is. All the threat of looking like a loser melted very quickly when talking with people became normal and not a certain doom scenario. It still affects me and I still sweat and tense up in some social situations but for the first time in fucking years I can feel my condition get better.

I wish I knew exactly when and what happened to turn it around, but I know it came from breaking my habits, doing what needed to be done and taking the plunge. It took 5 years of courage to finally do it but I honestly don't remember being more optimistic and happy in all the time I've tried to hide myself from my fears.
>> Anonymous
>>482534
fuck you, i am very social, i am just better.
my value > whole world value
>> Anonymous
watch "lars and the real girl"

doubt its a credible cure, but its still a good movie
>> Anonymous
>>482548

why don't you say that to my face fucker

oh thats right you can't because you're an anti social faggot afraid of talking to real people. fuck you.