File :-(, x, )
The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
All right /fit/, I am a martial arts instructor and spiritual counselor. I have attempted to offer my services on /b/ and failed, for the most part.

Ask me anything.
>> Anonymous
Am I fat? I've felt fat all day.
>> Failure
Prove it.
>> Failure
>>288070

Damn it! I wasn't fast enough. Fatty.
>> Anonymous
why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288070

I'm not certain. I would need to know more about you to tell you if you could be classified as obese.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288071

Ask me relevant questions, and it should become apparent.

>>288073

Interesting question. I don't think I know the answer. Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
>> Anonymous
why did i change everything in my life? from who i am friends with to the place i live?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
     File :-(, x)
Awaiting more questions, this isn't beating the /b/ thread so far.

Compared to most of what you see on /fit/, I'll attempt to offer legitimate advice.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288087

Can you be more specific? Change is a necessary component of life, though our society (America) has endeavored (inadvertently, probably) to make you resist it.

As you age, you will go through a lot of changes in perspective as to what really serves you and is good for you. My best advice is to not fear those changes, especially if they are natural inclinations from within. The results of a change can not necessarily immediately be classified as good or bad, even if they are apparently thus in the present moment. What the future holds is always unknown.

If your change does not serve you in this moment, observe it instead of regretting it. Even apparently "bad" change creates opportunity.
>> Anonymous
Whats a good martial art to learn if you're considering joining the UK police force.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288097

Thank you for a legitimate question.

The UK police force only uses small arms situationally, so you will want to learn an art that focuses on:
A) Stopping an attacker without causing substantial harm.
B) Subduing that attacker, or multiple assailants, so they cannot reasonably continue to create a problematic situation.

I would recommend Aikido or Judo, since these arts are oriented towards quick submission holds and joint locks rather than punching and kicking. Assaulting others as a police officer can look very bad, so you want to try and make it look as good as possible.

Stay away from Kenpo/Wushu/Tae Kwon Do/Shito Ryu and other direct, linear attack arts. They won't serve you as much. Stick to circular arts such as the aforementioned. As a bonus, they'll also teach you how to use your baton.

The police academy does teach some Judo techniques, but in my experience in America it is insufficient training (I taught at a police academy for a few years.) I can't speak for UK training though.
>> Anonymous
OK Mr. Martial Arts instructor/spiritual counselor. Before I ask a question I need to know your religious background. I don't know if you can be trusted AS I AM AN ATHEIST AND DON'T WANT TO HAVE CHRISTIAN BIAS PUSHED ONTO ME. BAWWWWWW
>> Anonymous
>>288068

Hey counselor,

I'm currently 2 months into my bulking regimen, and progress is solid.

I have been minmizing anaerobic in order to conserve calories for muscle growth and repair.

I have considered Muay Thai as a form of intense cardio when I start cutting next year.

My question is: is there anything I can do NOW to improve my boxing ability when I start cutting 6 months from now? i.e. stretching, certain exercises, boxing once a week...etc.

Any insight would be greatly appreciated.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288107

Understood. Your question is totally legitimate.

I am not affiliated with any belief system or canon. I've read the Bible a few times, the Koran, the Tao Te Ching, the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads, the Course in Miracles, and many of the Vedas as well as the Dhammapeda.

I believe every religion has incredible messages within it. The actual belief in 'God' is irrelevant, to me, because either way we slice it all we have is the present moment. Rather than debate what is essentially unknowable, we may as well instead focus on service to others (altruism) and to ourselves, as this strikes me as a better use of the limited time we have.
>> Anonymous
>>288102
Thanks for your response I will look into both of these!
>> Doctor Thaddeus P. Westinghouse III, M.D., PhD !!szQToNGkp98
I had a patient today who I diagnosed with pregnancy-induced thrombotic thrombocytopenic purpura. She was 4 months along, just into her second trimester. In order to save her life, we had to terminate the pregnancy. She was very distraught over the decision. Tonight she is heavily sedated in the ICU, and tomorrow I have to deal with her (yes, on my day off). Although I've dealt with numerous patients with whom I've had to give terrible news, this is a fairly unique case.

Any advice on how I should proceed?
>> Anonymous
sage for reccomending aikido
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288113

Hey, great question, and yes.

The #1 problem that I see people run into in fitness is they bulk up their muscles (and there are a variety of ways to do this, I won't go into the semantics of it) but forget to train their muscle memory or their body to their new shape.

Make your training a complete and whole body experience. Your boxing talent doesn't begin at your arms or hands, it begins at your feet. The power thrusts through your feet and into your torso, to your shoulder and finally into your arm. What I'm saying is, it's imperative to train every avenue of your body to be an effective fighter.

The first thing I would do is pick up the book for $10 "Stretching" by Bob Anderson. It has stretches for specific sports. Utilize these twice a day.

Next, for cardio, you can hardly ever beat running. Jump roping is another option, but if you can run 1-2 miles every other day, this will really help your long term endurance during those multi-round fights.

Overall, make your training an entire-body experience. Don't ever build just because you can, anyone can build, but the true masters have trained their body to use their strength, not just look it.

If you want a more specific answer beyond this, please ask.
>> Anonymous
>>288068
why do you suck your students cock faggot?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288119

I can't tell if this is a serious question, but it sounds like it, so I'll address it the best I can.

This situation is really disaster control. The absolute best thing you may be able to do at this stage is focus her into seeing the good in the situation. There is a certain protocol in hospitals that must be followed, and you should tell her this protocol and how it was applied to her situation.

The obvious advice of being compassionate withstanding, do not attempt to "compare" her life to her child's, because that is impossible to justify. Instead, attempt to make her aware of the present moment, bring her to consciousness about what has happened, and tell her that, while the situation appears to be "terrible" now, there was some reason this happened, and good can come of it in time.

If she is religious, you can describe this as God's plan. If this doesn't seem like an appropriate avenue, then you will have to tell her that there is some purpose behind this apparent madness, and that if she can come into the light about it, she may be able to see some good in even the most horrible of circumstances.

If this is really going to occur, then I am truly sorry for the position you're in right now.
>> Anonymous
>>288076
I've gained 3lbs over the course of the summer. Its probably 95% muscle though.

But the fat placement on my stomach has shifted from my lower stomach to above my belly button. Its making me depressed.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288120

Aikido is a wonderful and beautiful art. The power lies in the mental actualization of the student instead of blind technique. This is why many people often have trouble with it.

>>288127
To my knowledge, this has not occurred in any of my classes.
>> Anonymous
>>288130
as far as anyone on /fit/ has been able to tell, dr. westinghouse is a legitimate doctor
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288132

This sounds a little like a water retention problem, but I would still need more detail to confirm it. My suggestion would be to increase your ab work (crunches, squats, and full pull ups), cut down on your sodium intake, and do oblique exercises. (Just YouTube for that, there's a ton of great videos.)

For your depression, realize that you are not inherently your body. And since it sounds like you are not morbidly obese, I very highly doubt that you are judged by your body either. You are beautiful and unique well beyond your physique - don't judge yourself for it. There is so much more to you than just "how you look" - look within yourself and you'll find great qualities.
>> Anonymous
Hey counselor,

>>288113here.

I want to sincerely thank you for your time offering this advice. I'm an altruist myself in everyday life, which is why I visit /fit/ exclusively just to offer advice.

I honestly hope that you won't be bothered by some of the less-than-serious posts.

Even though I frequent 4chan, I'm an extremely religious person (helps me make sense of life), and I always wanted to become well-versed on the topic of spirituality. I'm a full-time grad student, and I haven't been able to find the time to start pusuing further knowledge on the subject.

Would you be kind enough to recommend some readings to get me started on the subject?

Thanks again, and I hope to see you around here more frequently.
>> Anonymous
>>288142
OH FUCK, DID YOU JUST BASICALLY TELL HIM HE COULD SPOT-REDUCE???!!!!???!?!?!?

IN DURING MOTHERFUCKING SHITSTORM
>> Anonymous
>>288144
water retention isn't the same as spot-reducing fucktard
>> Anonymous
>>288144

4chan: where thread shits are about as avoidable as death.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288143

Thank you for the wonderful post and complement. The weird posts don't bother me, it's something you have to expect if you're going to 4chan to offer advice.

As a short introduction, you are already well on the path to spiritual actualization just by actively seeking it. Give me a couple moments to write up some suggestions for you.

>>288144
I am a martial arts instructor, not a fitness expert or personal trainer. I don't claim to be an expert in these fields, but I do train a lot and I have seen some things work and some things not.

Training is about consistency, moreso than it's about arguments over what is right and what is not. If you work out consistently, and train often, with a good attitude, you will see improvement, almost no matter what you do.
>> Anonymous
>>288148
You don't get rid of excess water by doing crunches.
>> Anonymous
>>288152
I think I see why this guy posted a picture from The Matrix. No offense but it feels like you're talking without actually "saying" anything. Advice like "you have to left to go right" for example.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288143

All right. To get started, I would highly recommend the following four books, and probably read in this order:
1) "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle.
2) "The Peaceful Warrior" by Dan Millman.
3) "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle.
4) "Siddhartha" by Herman Hesse.

Every one of these books is utterly life changing, and an introduction to spirituality, to say the very least. Even considering myself relatively spiritually actualized, in reading these books I was utterly stunned. The Power of Now and Siddhartha I endeavor to read once a year, no matter what.

I think your focus on religion is beautiful, and you shouldn't change for anyone but yourself. In time, you may find that there is a different purpose to life than devotion to God, or not. Read, I didn't use "greater" or "lesser" - that doesn't exist. My purpose is service to others, but anyone's path is equally as beautiful.

If you read these books, you will find your start, and probably then some. Space them out and give your mind time to absorb, but they really will empower you.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288164

I recommended other advice in addition to this. I'm not a fitness instructor so, who knows.

>>288167
That's because the best advice can't be from another person, it has to come from you. I am trying legitimately to offer helpful words to you, but direct responses can often be misconstrued. I don't want to claim I'm "right" or "wrong," because my answers aren't -your- answers. Therefore, my answers are directed towards you finding your own answers, and do not provide direct step-by-step directions to enlightenment. You will find the majority of spiritual instruction the same.

This is not for everyone, my answers are not universally correct or wrong, but more likely either proper or not to your current life situation.
>> Anonymous
Hello Mr. Counselor.

I do the stronglifts 5x5 program 3 times a week. To warm up I always run a mile, is this a good thing to do or no? If not, what should I do to warm up?

Thanks.
>> blah
>>288167

Everything doesn't have a "right" answer. Sometimes you have to go left before going right.

Too many people neglect the mental and spiritual sides of fitness. The body has to be approached as a whole - one's mind is part of his or her body. A complete fitness program must address it all.

Thank you for posting, counselor.

Best,
blah
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288178

I've heard very mixed results on this. Many personal trainers have advised to me that cardio and building in the same regime can limit actual muscle production. You may want to space out your training into different areas.

Running is extremely good for you, anyway you slice it. Don't cut this out of your routine. It may be more about what you want to do with your body. It sounds like you're looking to build, so separate your workouts into separate days (or afternoon/morning) to be safe.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288181

I absolutely agree. I am attempting to offer the best answers I can with that in mind. :)
>> Anonymous
Lol at your vague spiritual nomenclature, I can do it too

Approach the mind with your goal and manifest its reality by going deep into the conscious and defeating it.
>> Anonymous
I am an athiest and deathly afraid of dying. What can i do to solve my fear of non-existance?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
Okay, I'm off for fifteen to thirty minutes.

It's pretty hot here, so I'm going to jump into the lake next to my house.

I'll keep answering questions when I return, and if the thread is dead by the time I'm back, I will start a new one.

Thank you for the questions so far, and I hope I've helped someone in some small way.
>> Anonymous
>>288142
I have an eating disorder and seeing as I judge others by their fitness level, why wouldn't they do the same to me?

And yeah, you can't spot reduce.

But it might be water retention due to a kind of high sodium intake (my sweat isn't salty though..) and 28 days later. But then again, I don't care. I have an eating disorder and don't accept reality.
>> Anonymous
>>288194
Quick, while he's gone lets close the blinds and pretend we're not home!
>> Anonymous
What is the matrix?
>> Anonymous
>>288193

First off:
*atheist
*existence

Secondly, there is nothing to fear. Literally. What can you fear about nothing? There IS nothing fearful about it.

It's inevitable, too. What good is it to fear something that will invariably defeat you? Just enjoy the time before it does.
>> Anonymous
>>288184
Thanks for the answer. So basically I should try to cut out the running on my lifting days and do it on other days, correct?
>> Anonymous
Sprinting will actually cause growth hormones to be released. It's quicker than long cardio sessions, too, which can decrease levels of hormones.
>> Anonymous
>>288211
which is why HIIT is far more effective then long distance running.

Unless of course you are trying to practice for long distance running or something.
>> Anonymous
>>288114
I'm the anonymous that asked you that question. DELAYED response from me! Sorry. What holy texts/parts of holy texts in your opinion do you think are most worth reading? And how can you incorporate spirituality into exercise?
>> Anonymous
>>288216
They call them marathons.
>> Anonymous
>>288216
What is it about the sprinting that makes it so? I know its true, I just don't remember the science which I would like to relearn.
>> Anonymous
>>288178
Running a mile won't do anything bad.
To the contrary, excellent for lubing your knees.
Just do eet.
>> Anonymous
>>288221
Try kyudo, aikido, kendo or whatever else japanese art, you might find what you seek.
>> Anonymous
>>288193

Nothing, we all fear death, religious or not.
Just forget it and live like a motherfucker.
>> Anonymous
>>288223
marathon isn't really long distance. I'm thinking more about 24 hour runs and shit like that.
>> Anonymous
>>288234
Cool, cheers mate.
>> Anonymous
>>288247
The more degress you have the better.
Actually being a lawyer, psychiatrist and whatnot at once makes you untouchable.
People will flock to you and believe every shit you tell them.
And best is you'll get paid for it too!
>> Anonymous
How does it feel knowing your hands can be classified as "lethal weapons" in a court of law?
>> Anonymous
>>288278
It feels like knowing that angloamerican laws are fucking retarded.
>> Anonymous
Hello, Counselor, I guess I have a serious question about something upcoming.

I'm a martial artist who sees the practicalities and the benefits of many martial arts. I've studied in Karate, Tae-Kwon-Do, Muay Thai, Jujitsu, Tai Chi Quan, Bai Kai Kung Fu, Jeet Kun Do and I'm soon to study under my college for Aikido---I'm unsure of its particular style or form, however---

What do you think would be best in terms of training my body for reflexes and precise movement? I'm 6'2, and I weigh 185-190 lbs (Depending on the week of training I do for workouts/dieting). I've lithe form, but my muscle is compacted---I've always developed myself through power techniques which even the smallest punch could be explosive internally and externally.

But because of this, no matter -where- I hit, it would do damage, and generally ended spars or fights (I avoid them) quickly. As a result, my reflexes and my preciseness that I had from training with instructors that are now far away are gone, and as are my sparring partners and mentors--I wanted to know if you could help me on those two issues.
Reflexes and Preciseness.
>> Anonymous
>>288282
meditate for some hours under a cold waterfall in the japanese mountains.
>> Anonymous
>>288284
....kay.
Should I stop bullets with my hands nao?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
I'm back, but need some time to address previous questions. Thanks for keeping the thread going.

All right, give me a few moments to get caught up.
>> Anonymous
HOW CAN ONE MOTIVATE OTHERS TO IMPROVE THEIR HEALTH THROUGH EXERCISE?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288189

The nature of the answer depends on the question. I addressed this already. If you ask me more specific questions, I'll try to answer less vaguely.

>>288195
Most people will judge you for how you appear, how you talk, and the way you carry yourself. The trick is to garner your appreciation internally, and not from them. You don't need anyone else to tell you you're a good person. Only you can give that to yourself.

>>288200
The Matrix is a system. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around, what do you see? Businessmen, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to be unplugged. And many of them are so inured, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that they will fight to protect it.

>>288203
I would give this a shot over a month and see how it serves you, yes.

Working on the others.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288221

This is a truly awesome question. If you live in America, I highly recommend reading the Bible simply for discussion's sake. I can't tell you how many devoted Christians I've run into who haven't read it - it's staggering. For a more worldly theological view, read the Dhammapeda of Buddhism (short read) and the Tao Te Ching of Taoism. You will have religious background from three cultures this way, and a strong standing in the major religions of the countries of power (America, India, China.)

Incorporation of spirituality into exercise - this would take days to explain. The best advice I can give is to make your exercise into more than "individually working out one part of you." Most people do Tuesday arms, Wednesday legs, Thursday triceps, etc. Make each workout a full body experience in some way - at the very least by incorporating basic stretching.

Addendum, after cardio sessions, do a short breathing exercise or meditation to center yourself. Attempt in your workout to focus on each moment, do not try to block out the feeling of your muscles straining, or the pain. Immerse into it, close your eyes and be right there. Actively -feel- your body improving, don't just be a drone/observer to it.
>> Anonymous
>>288315
>Most people will judge you for how you appear, how you talk, and the way you carry yourself. The trick is to garner your appreciation internally, and not from them. You don't need anyone else to tell you you're a good person. Only you can give that to yourself.

I'm not the person you responded to. I have realized this for two years now, and have been making an effort to do all the things you described. What can one do to really apply this knowledge in life? I try to, but it can be very hard to sometimes.
>> Anonymous
>>288168
I read Siddhartha last year in my English class. Great book.

Anyway, this is kind of a basic weight lifting question, but everyone on /fa/ is mesmerized by that Stronglifts website so I haven't been able to get a straight answer:

What is the difference between High Rep/ Low Weight lifting and Low Rep/ High Weight lifting?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288241

The samurai of yore's core philosophy involved constant meditation on death. There are warrior-castes that have ascended beyond the fear of death. I don't believe this is necessary for spiritual actualization. Ascending beyond fear of change (and change is death, in a way) is necessary for enlightenment.

>>288278
Odd. I had to register with Nevada when I became a martial arts instructor here (moving from California) - the law doesn't make too much sense, because ideally martial artists at instructor level should be able to control themselves. I think it's more reasonable to put this requirement on every 250 pound semi-muscular guy, because they can do more damage than me even without technique on a regular basis.

Interesting note towards the circumvention of this law - if you're good at Aikido or Judo, you can often make it appear to police as if you weren't in a fight at all. When officers confront you for fighting, they check your elbows, knuckles, knees, and feet for abrasions or scratches. If you don't have discernible wounds, you get off with self-defense. You can accomplish this by utilizing joint locks and throws. It works in real time, (some people think they don't) but takes practice.
>> Anonymous
>>288324
>If you live in America, I highly recommend reading the Bible simply for discussion's sake.
I am a former Christian, so I have read quite a bit of that. It's the inconsistencies of the Bible as I actively pursued reading it that first started to lead me away from Christianity. Should I study the Bible? Or just read through it?

>For a more worldly theological view, read the Dhammapeda of Buddhism (short read)
I thought that the Dhammapeda was a long collection of texts. It is short?

>Tao Te Ching of Taoism.
I have read part of this, and I have read the Tao of Pooh, but I don't understand Taoism at all to be honest.

>Attempt in your workout to focus on each moment, do not try to block out the feeling of your muscles straining, or the pain.
So make the exercise a moment focused meditation? Take in all the senses?
>> Anonymous
>>288328
High Rep/Low Weight will generate more tone and muscular definition, where as the low rep/high weight generally tends to bulk the muscle.
Its very similar to the basic development of hunting/gathering from back in the old days---Those that needed to throw spears/ shoot arrows, swing blades/weapons---would do so rigorously in a hunt and thus toned their muscles to do so. Those that had stoic things to attain, but had to do heavy lifting to get to it, bulked muscle in order to gain...
Sorry, I'm no the OP, just anon.
>> Anonymous
>>288338
Anon will do. No one on /fa/ would give me a non troll answer. Thanks man, no need to waste your time on my question now, Counselor.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288282
Great question. You're a man after my own heart. I started in hard arts (Shaolin Kenpo) before I moved to Aikido and had the same problem.

The best advice I can offer is to get into the literal practice of Aikido with an Uke (student) as soon as possible. Start slow and train your muscles to memorize the techniques. Your body is already in shape and has the internal knowledge to make these moves work from your previous martial arts - but the majority of your training has been linear thus far, so you're going to need a shift in perspective.

Aikido is more a mental art than a physical one. More than anything else, you need to believe in what you're doing, and you need to let your chi flow in place of strength. Don't "unlearn" your previous martial arts, this is a mistake, but while you're physically *in* the Aikido dojo, throw your knowledge away. Become totally willing to accept these new techniques as legitimate, and don't compare them to your previous training. Later on, you'll be able to incorporate both your old training and Aikido into your own style, which is nearly invincible in the right hands.

But yeah, you need to train your precise movement / reflexes through the actual art itself. This is really the best way. Alternatively, use precision weapon training. Aikido uses the bo-staff (a 21 and 27 step technique in Aiki-budo under Koichi Tohei, my school) so it may be a good idea to get started with that weapon.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>288328
This'll help clear up the rep problem. again.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288284
This won't help you do much, but is a cool mental discipline training technique.

>>288314
Be a part of the change with them. Everyone is motivated towards health - Jung would say the human psyche is driven towards it, and I tend to agree with this perspective.

Offer to run with them, starting in short 15-30 minute intervals. Go lifting with them, or talk them into you holding their feet for a while to do some sit-ups. Become an example of fitness yourself, expressing (in a non-arrogant fashion) how good exercise can make someone feel.

This may seem like a lot of work, but the best way to change someone towards a more /fit/ lifestyle is to be there for them. On a wider level, you can give seminars etc, but towards the individual, you'll find this technique effective.
>> Anonymous
>>288334
I call bullshit. Samurai and everyone else feared death just like we do. It's just suppression and blind loyalty that made them "forget". Example: Seppuku turned into a hollow ritual after a short period, since nobody could stand them writhing in pain. So they just cut the head off.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288328
>>288345
>>288338

These are great answers. I couldn't have covered it better, actually, so it's great this anon stepped in, thanks.
>> Anonymous
Can you post a pic of yourself, Counselor? You seem like a man who has reached, for lack of a better word, enlightenment.
>> Anonymous
>>288337
Read it if you must, but for god's sake (haha) don't learn that shit.
Religion is opium for the masses.
Read Marx or Kant or Nietzsche if you want intellectual entertainment.
Who the hell wastes his time with religious discussion anyway?
>> Anonymous
>>288338
High rep low weight will NOT "tone" you.
There is no "toning" to begin with.
Depending on how many reps you might get endurance, but that's it.
>> Anonymous
>>288349
That is a very debatable view on Aikido that is not shared by everyone.
I know a 4th dan that would tell me that Chi is utter bullshit and all you do is train, train and train more, so that your movements become automatic reflexes. No spiritual mumbo-jumbo, just martial arts.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288325

An awesome question. The question is how can you seek internal appreciation, and the answer is a little complicated, but I'll try my best.

The first part of this will probably get flamed harder than anything else I'll ever say on /fit/. You need to lose your identification with what society and the majority of people consider is important. This means, your job, your upbringing, your family, your car, your $5000 stereo system, etc.

I'm not telling you to LOSE or abandon these things, this is a common misconception of the Buddhist idea of detachment. I'm telling you to realize that all these things are inevitably temporal, you will have to lose them, they are, in a way, already gone.

You gain internal happiness, truly, when you realize the absolute temporary nature of all things. Once you realize your life must end (regardless of what/when that end will be) and that all of your possessions', friends, and you yourself are limited, the only appropriate response to life is appreciation for what you have now. Seek to be absolutely grateful for every moment you're given, because it's a miracle, no matter how it got here. (God, Chi, Just Popped In Atheism, whatever)

Sometimes people who reach this aforementioned state hit Nihilism/absolute apathy and lose the substance of life. This is common among intellectuals, but is actually a mid-way step in actualization and not the end.

In realizing that you are temporary, you also realize that other peoples feelings, judgments, and words towards you are also temporary, and therefore simply not worth getting upset or pained about.

This is just an introduction and doesn't necessarily go through process of actualization. I -know- this is going to be torched, but take what you can out of it and try to apply it to your own life situation.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288357
This was just one example. Keep in mind how prevalent death is in Japanese society. Just look at suicide rates. Death is an excusable way out of a very bad situation in Japan, whereas in America fear of pain and social stature (ironically even after death) keeps a lot of people from really going all the way.

You're just going to have to trust me on this, at a high level of spiritual actualization death becomes totally irrelevant, because you are connected to a collective consciousness of sorts that accepts it as an inevitability anyway.

>>288337
There are TONS of Buddhist scriptures, the Dhammapeda is just a collection of some of them, but it's probably the best one to get started on.

The Bible? Yeah, it's a good thing to know about. You probably won't gain a whole lot spiritually from studying it, but try to see the internal metaphor in it. True Christianity is beautiful, because it's about forgiveness, compassion, love, and altruism for everyone. Unfortunately, this is not translated into modern society in America.

Taoism is not exactly meant to be understood in a literal way. The Taoist's cloaked most of the "true answers" they claimed to have in metaphor so that only people who devoted their lives to The Way could become true Immortals. I personally think the entire thing is a metaphor, but you get what you want out of it. I mentioned to study Taoism because it can be good to know about.

>> So make the exercise a moment focused meditation? Take in all the senses?

Essentially, but don't think of it like meditation - think of it as an absolute focus into the present moment. The present moment is where you are, at this very second, and you are in a consistent series of present moments. By focusing on every part of your body and how it feels during exercise, you will be able to listen to what your body needs and what is wrong with your body much easier when problems within it arise.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288381
Very true, but the current Grandmaster of Aikido, and the direct student of Morihei himself, Koichi Tohei, takes this view, so I tend to go with it.

I'm a progenitor of the philosophy the Ki Foundation attempts to uphold, largely because I've seen chi work on the floor. It's definitely debatable, and I don't expect it to work for everyone.

The use and manipulation of chi in martial arts is something that -has- to be seen and felt to be truly accepted.
>> Anonymous
>>288410

kinda like faith, the precursor to all religion
>> Anonymous
>>288383
>>288383
Yes. I think about how temporary everything is daily. After becoming an atheist the first thing I explored was Buddhism. I read a lot of stuff about it. That was very interesting stuff indeed.
I try to remind myself how temporary everything is, that it will disappear one day. It is hard to really... appreciate it though. It is hard to get my actions to reflect this. My thoughts to reflect this.

>Sometimes people who reach this aforementioned state hit Nihilism/absolute apathy and lose the substance of life. This is common among intellectuals, but is actually a mid-way step in actualization and not the end.

This happened to me for a while but I didn't take it too seriously (as with a lot of things). I don't like taking life too seriously. It was sort of funny to be cynical, and look at everything as meaningless since it will all come to an end. In the back of my mind while "believing" this I realized that I don't know, and can't know if I was correct, which added to the humor of thinking this way. I don't think I did a good job of explaining this.

Anyway. What I do try to do in my daily life is say "momento mori" and "carpe diem", and then remember how everything is going to dissappear (all we are is dust in the wind), but much of the time my actions, habits, thoughts, end up becoming a great big brick wall in my way. It is a goal of mine to live for today, to be a better person, to build the people around me up, to make people feel good, to take ownership of everything in my life, and strive to improve it all. I, however, struggle towards this. What practical simple things do you recommend? Something that I can apply in my daily life immediately?
>> Anonymous
>>288410
I know what Chi or Ki is for me, since I practice Kyudo for some years now: The control of breathing and direction of energy in the body.
And by energy I mean physical energy, not something mystical.
Those guys making something spiritual out of it are nuts or frauds.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
     File :-(, x)
>>288367

Thank you. I've been told this in real life, but it honestly feels like I still know nothing about the "bigger picture" when it really comes down to it.

I've devoted my life to the pursuit of enlightenment, which I really learned means practicing everything. Even enlightened leaders of old (Jesus, Buddha, Lao Tzu) took -hours- of their day (the Buddha meditating for six hours a day, often) to keep their state of mind once they had attained it. In the modern world, enlightenment may not be realistic, but it is so rare for someone to even be happy in modern society, that I believe internal actualization is enough to pursue.

One of my favorite quotes in "The Peaceful Warrior" by Dan Millman, an enlightened sage named Socrates says, "Death isn't sad, Dan, what's truly tragic is that most people never live."

And yeah, this is a picture of when I was 18 teaching at a martial arts dojo in San Diego. I'm just a regular guy, I'm 23 now, I'll see if I can find a more recent picture if you'd really like one.
>> Anonymous
>>288383

Well, then I'll be the first to say that this is the best post in this thread so far.

I approach life the same way. Everything is so painfully temporary that it is just not worth getting riled up over anything.

I treat my parents with respect and love, so that one day I won't regret how I spent my time with them when they're gone.

I put everything I've got into my exercise regimen, even if it's not yielding immediate results.

I put very, VERY careful consideration into everything I say to people. Surprisingly, it's far more challenging to be nice, forgiving and understanding then it is to be an inconsiderate asshole. I find this challenge to be infinitely rewarding.

Keep it up, counselor. I'm the guy you recommended the readings and the Muay Thai to, and I may just have to become a tripfag so that we can recognize each other in the future.

Keep it up.
>> blah
>>288383
"In realizing that you are temporary, you also realize that other peoples feelings, judgments, and words towards you are also temporary, and therefore simply not worth getting upset or pained about."


Counselor,

If this is so, how one who has realized this to be emotional and empathetic toward others?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288431

I'm correcting my own last post, because it sounds selfish - and I didn't intend it to come off that way. My external goal is enlightenment, but my internal goal is service to others. I believe there is no real higher purpose than that.

>>288428

I believe there is a definitive scientific basis behind physical energy that is not fully explored. Is Chi "The Way," an external consciousness or force flowing through the universe? I don't know, that question is beyond me.

I know what I've felt on the floor, and what I've personally trained with, and there is more to combat than just applying external force. There -is- something internal, and it can be applied at a technique level. What that is and what it can truly do is definitely a gray area, I completely agree with you.
>> Anonymous
>>288431

>>288432Again...

Hey! I'm San Diegan too :) ! I go to state for my Masters in CS...

Where do you live now?
>> Anonymous
>>288431
Another picture would be cool. I'm glad you're living an altruistic lifestyle.
>> blah
As fascinating as this thread is, I'm living a sleepy lifestyle right now. My eyes are folding. This is one of the rare times I wish 4chan threads did not disappear.

Best,
blah
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288432
My greatest thanks to you. -You- are the change that is going to move this world in a different direction. By just the little you've told me, I know you have a thousand things to be grateful for every day, and even in the darkest moments, that'll keep you going.

>>288433
There are three common responses to the realization that you are truly going to die and lose everything. They are:
1) The acknowledgment that there must be some continuation beyond your life, and the justification of that through faith-based means.
2) Total Nihilism, depression (Nietzche's later years) and acceptance that all life is worthless because you will lose it anyway, so screw it.
3) Compassion, the rarest response to the realization. I was once told by a 3-time convicted cop killer to find at least one thing to be grateful for every day. Compassion arises when you accept that every moment you are given is a truly incredible gift. So many people out there are dieing from horrible causes, from starvation, from violence, from the collective pain that this world suffers.

We, here, for the most part, sit at our computers, work cushy 9-5's, can eat - even the poorest life in the United States can barely compare to the poor Indian farmer. This is beside the point, though, the point is there is a difference between your LIFE and your *life situation.*

Your life situation is you lost your job, girlfriend, your car blew up, your dad hits you, you won the lottery, you make $1,000 a minute selling socks, whatever. Your life situation is good and bad.

Your LIFE is not good or bad. Your life is. You are alive. Compassion comes from identifying with your -life- and not your -life situation.- As long as you identify with your life situation, you will suffer. But life is more than that, your actual existence is far more than that. Once you identify with your life as the real thing behind everything, compassion is the only appropriate response.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288438

I live in Lake Tahoe, Nevada. It is a small town, near some other larger towns, and I love the feel of the forest and nature very much. I teach seminars and lead groups from here and Reno.

>>288439
I'll try to find a more modern one in a while. Please remind me if I lose track of it.

>>288446
Fare well. I'll probably be back after this thread dies, at some point. 90% of these conversations have been positive, and both I ( and I hope others ) have learned a ton from it. I'd like to keep this going for now, as I said before, if people are gaining even a small amount of help from this, then it's all worth it.
>> Anonymous
This was truly one of the only memorable things I've read on 4chan, thank you for this. I hope to see you around here more often.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
I'll be taking a short break to eat for fifteen minutes.

Keep the questions rolling if you like, thank you. :)
>> Anonymous
I've only skimmed most of the posts thus far, so I may have missed it somewhere, but what art(s) do you teach or have taught? And what arts do you train in/have you trained in? From what I've seen you seem to be very much a traditionalist - if this is true I'd be curious as to your stances on the value of most 'traditional' arts and their general lack of hard sparring or even on their lack of useful techniques in general.
>> Anonymous
i'm a twig.
over the summer i thought i'd try to gain some muscle by going to the gym and eating more.
ive been going to the gym every day for about 30 minutes and went from about 1500 calories a day to 4000 and i gained only 5 lbs
wtf...
inb4 SQUATZ
>> blah
>>288383

"...you also realize that other peoples feelings, judgments, and words towards you are also temporary, and therefore simply not worth getting upset or pained about."

Counselor,

If this is so, how is one who has realized this to be emotional and empathetic toward others?

Thanks,
blah
>> Anonymous
>>288472
Are you able to lift more now than when you started? If so, don't care about your weight.
You gained muscle and lost fat at the same time, so your overall weight stayed the same.
>> Anonymous
>>288470
What do you mean with lack of sparring in traditional arts? Aikido for example?
Aikido is a quite new martial art, an Amalgam that Morihei created by using Jujutsu and others.
Traditional jujutsu uses sparring very much.
Back then you had to fight to survive, martial arts were practical.
>> Anonymous
>>288450
this is very good and I'll remember it.
>> blah
>>288475

Counselor,

Sorry for repeating my question. I did not see your excellent response.

Thanks,
blah
>> Anonymous
>>288478
oh no, you don't understand... i'm a twig.
i had no body fat
and yes i can lift twice as much as i started
>> blah
>>288493

Research nutrition plans optimized to gaining weight via muscle. You probably don't want to gain fat. Your best bet is to eat proper ratios of foods that will help your exercise to increase your size.

Keep your expectations in cheque, too. If you have a small frame, small muscles, and it's in your genes to be small, do not expect short-term bulking. It will take a long duration of concerted effort via exercise and diet to get the results you're after.

Best,
blah
>> Anonymous
>>288493
what regimen do you do?
30 mins seems short.
Also you realize that it's hard to gain muscle weight? Consider yourself lucky if you can add some pounds in three months, especially if you only just started.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288470
I haven't said anything about that yet, because this thread is about you, and not about me.

Your assumption is accurate, though, I started doing Shaolin Kenpo at age 4, and trained in various martial arts through that period up until age 16-18. Some of them included were Judo, Shito Ryu, Saito Ryu Ninjitsu, Shotokan, and Tai Chi. From 16 or 17 until now, I met a direct student of Koichi Tohei and started Aiki-budo.

I am only certified to teach Kenpo and Aikido, though I incorporate other martial arts into the instruction. I feel I am fairly advanced in Kenpo, but probably no more than a beginning student to Aikido, even after years and years.

All martial arts are beautiful, the only martial art I have qualm with is Tae Kwon Do in America. Conventional TKD from Korea is a pretty vicious linear art, and under the right instructor is very effective.

Unfortunately, it's been twisted in America to become more about show. My greatest concern is that these dojos often give out black belts to students who have only been training for two years or less. This gives students a false sense of empowerment and often leads them to harm or to be extremely arrogant.

Martial Arts isn't really about the belts or the ranking system. It's about mental and physical discipline, and the unification of mind, body, and spirit. In some places, this is already lost, which is truly unfortunate.

Other than those exceptions, all martial arts are wonderful. Huang Jin Jia taught us that all martial arts are equal, just like people, and this is my perspective on the arts. The ones I practice are just by personal preference.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
I think I'm finally caught up. I'll be awaiting some more questions, if you would like to offer them.
>> Anonymous
>>288515
See:
>>288427
My post isn't very clear thought, I don't think it is at least.
>> Anonymous
>>288503
I don't just want to build muscle, I want to gain healthy weight so i can stop weighing less than an eight year old girl. The best way to do that is eat more and lift amirite?
I'll worry more about bulking up after I break 150lbs.
But so far its not looking like I'm going to do that anytime soon.
And I've only been doing exercises on a TuffStuff
working my lower body one day and my upper body the next.
Once a week i will break.
>> Anonymous
>>288528
Building muscle equals gaining healthy weight. So you DO want to build muscle.
>> Anonymous
>>288528
try stronglifts 5x5.

If you want to gain weight, there's no way around doing SQUATZ, deadlifts, benchpress, overhead press, pull-ups, chin-ups.
These are the basics and they work.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288427

Great question. One of the most difficult questions I receive is very similar to this. "Ok, I'm on the path to actualization, but what do I do in everyday life to improve it?"

First of all, let me say that by virtue of you recognizing you are on the path, you are already walking it. You are actively focusing on the things you need to, to become more spiritually actualized.

Because of that, and that said, don't worry about being a better person, helping others, or judging yourself for "at what level" you are altruistically. Regardless whether you help 200,000 people a day or one, you are still externalizing one of the (in my opinion) greatest callings that a human being can ever have.

To improve your spiritual actualization on a daily basis, let me recommend a few, direct and non-vague techniques.
1) Repetitive self-affirmations. These are very good for breaking habits, or for centralizing yourself on a concept. For example, telling yourself in the morning and night that you are going to attempt to live in the present moment and do three good things for someone today.
2) Meditate for one or two hours a day, focusing on your breathing or on individual concepts like altruism, death, self-empowerment, and empowerment of others. I can elaborate on this if I get more specific questions.
3) Realize that you in a consistent stream of "now" moments. You can think about the future and how you're going to be, but ultimately nothing will ever occur in your life unless you, right -now-, orient your goals towards it.

Above everything else, realize that altruism is not something you have to force yourself to do, it's a way of life that you become as a result of internalizing compassion and love for humanity within yourself.
>> blah
>>288528

Gaining good (ie, muscle, bone) weight is accomplished through proper exercise and nutrition. "Eating more" will not necessarily let you grow. A 4000c diet of ineffective, "cheap" foods will be less beneficial than 3000c of properly balanced, quality foods.

I don't know what exercises to do to gain weight. I'm working to lose fat and hold my weight.

Best,
blah - seriously going to sleep now.
>> Anonymous
OP is a stupid faggot who thinks he knows shit but doesn't.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288555

I've found this to be very true. You need to eat what your body needs, which involves a diet high in protein and complex carbohydrates.

It is not rocket science to lose weight, in my opinion. The problem is not technique, because there are a thousand methods to completion, the problem is consistency.

In my experience, running provides the best cardio for weight loss. Building should be a full body experience, as I believe I've written about in a previous response.
>> Vague Spiritual Aphorism Dude
Some more improvised vague spiritual aphorisms by me:

By losing focusing your conscious thought on redemption in the material world, the spiritual universe will come into focus. When this happens, you will see the nature behind your problems and be able to destroy them absolutely.

Self-worth is a concept not related to spiritual devotion but rather spiritual understanding.

There any many paths than can be taken in an ordeal, but a better understanding of where they finally lead can be achieved by understanding the futility of hatred.

Time itself will not weaken grief if the individual does not invest in perspective changing.

In the deepest state of consciousness, the individual can see the transparency of material things and transcend the violent greed we have at our nature.

Meditating 4 hours daily will not only bring relaxation of the mind - it strengthens one's soul and foundation thereof.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288559
I would surmise this is more of an internal reflection of yourself projected on me than anything else. I am not your enemy, and no where in this thread will you find that I believe my answers are correct.

I put my time into helping people if I can. I do not know everything, and as I've written before, it feels like I know nothing. Despite this, I try to practice everything.

I don't claim to be a messiah, and flames like these are inevitable. I'm just here to help if I can. If you do not like my thread, the amazing power of the internet allows you to easily avoid it.
>> Anonymous
>>288575
What has he said that is really vague and spiritual? I must have missed it.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288575
I've responded to this flame already here:
>>288177

I've offered both vague answers (to difficult, somewhat amorphous questions) and direct techniques towards improvement.

Take it or leave it, your criticism bumps this thread, so it is positive in that way, but otherwise simply wastes your time.
>> Vague Spiritual Aphorism Dude
>>288582

One mustn't look on what one has missed but rather what one has gained. Only then will you be able to tackle the unknown.

>>288583

Criticism is essential to the soul - without it, all cracks will go unnoticed.

Generally, humans forget their innate ability to solve problems and immediately seek the company of others. This shows spiritual fragility and can be conquered by making a conscious effort to subsidize positive thoughts immediately after they appear.
>> Anonymous
>>288593
Continue to entertain me please.
>> Anonymous
>>288593
yes, this is good and funny.
>> Anonymous
>>288505

I can understand, to a degree, where you're coming from, but I can't say that I agree. Martial arts are, by definition, combat-oriented. I suppose that all martial arts are valuable in one sense or another in that they can improve personal fitness, discipline, focus, ect, and that the effectiveness of an art could be, in most cases, largely dependent on the instructor or student's own views/capabilities personally, but if a 'martial art' isn't useful in combat or trained in such a way as to, realistically, be useful in combat, then it should take 'martial' out of its name.

Let's take Kenpo for example - I've spoken to a number of Kenpo instructors and students and from what I've gathered it seems that Kenpo, like Judo and many other such 'traditional' arts, has a focus on the use of extreme or deadly force during conflict. This may have been reasonable hundreds of years ago, when fights were often against armored opponents and to the death, and it may even have value in a self-defense setting today, but the fact that it uses such drastic measures as eye gouges and throat/groin strikes means that it is very difficult to train realistically. Striking the air or an unresisting training partner may be fine as an introduction, but nobody is ever going to really learn to apply their skills in a live setting without practicing it in a live setting. I've seen taekwondo practitioners, kung fu practitioner's, karate practitioners, ect, with years and years of training spar for the first time and immediately resort to sloppy brawling. Advocating 'traditional' arts is cool if you're advocating them to someone looking for fitness or spirituality or discipline or whatever, but I don't think that telling them that they'll learn how to fight or defend themselves without sparring - continuous, hard sparring done regularly - is reasonable.
>> Vague Spiritual Aphorism Dude
>>>288600

Entertainment is an unnecessary luxury upon the realization of material frailty. Strengthen the inner urge and become greater than any material man will ever hope to me.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288593

Since you seem to just be trolling, I'll probably ignore your commentary unless you can formulate legitimate questions. I accept you as an inevitability of forum posting, but I wish you would accept that I have only good intentions by being here.

I'm hoping to get some more questions in the meantime.
>> Anonymous
>>288609
>I'm hoping to get some more questions in the meantime.
What do YOU do that is spiritual? Are you an atheist? Are you an agnostic? Are you a Buddhist? Are you a Hindu? What are YOU?
>> Anonymous
I have chronic pain with no relief, though am in treatment for it and maybe will be relieved of it one day, dunno though

2 questions, what's a good way to deal with the anxiety the pain brings with it? a little background about me was I never had anxiety once in my life until the pain came

2, the reason the anxiety is "back" is because I lift, and lift quite abit. but my philosophy about it is that the mussles that felt frozen(shoulder) and some misc back pain I had unrelated to my other injury have all cleared up since lifting, but my main source of pain has increased 5x so the way I see it is, no pain no gain, and I'm already in pain so adding a little more isnt gonna kill me, though it kinda is mentally
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288604

You make a completely legitimate point. I was not trying to downplay the importance of learning the technique behind martial arts, combat-training is an imperative aspect of martial arts, and sparring along with it.

What I may have failed to suggest is that technique will only get you so far before the necessity of mental discipline becomes needed to A) Avoid fights in the first place and B) Keep your mind up with what your body has learned.

Martial arts IS about combat, sparring, and training to fight. This is a very real part of its history, as you observantly noted. However, martial arts is also about the traditional side - and I stress that in this thread because most people who have a limited introduction to martial arts need to know that it extends beyond just the combat.

In a previous response on this thread, I recommended one person to find a student for training in their martial art of choice. Nothing can prepare you for the real thing like the real thing. So training repetitively is very important to your regime, though it is important to remember it is not all there is to the arts.
>> Anonymous
>>288609

My real problem is that you're being so goddamned pretentious. If you've got advice, then that's cool; if you're trying to establish yourself as an enlightened guru of all things spiritual, then piss off. You're formulating all your sentences non-workout related into these long-winded adages of mental masturbation. Nearly all of your advice is common sense and you're just dressing up the sentences to make them look like they're worth a buck.

inb4 panties in a bunch
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288615
I answered this question here:
>>288114

I know it is anti-climatic, but I honestly have no affiliation or title to any spirituality or religious belief system. I believe there is beauty in absolutely every devotion.
>> Anonymous
Sorry if this has been answered but this thread is too long...

How do you meditate? Really do you just sit and think? Breathing exercises?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288633
I suspect if I was attempting to establish myself as an "enlightened guru" - 4chan would not be the best place to start. As I stated before, my pretentiousness is probably an internal reflection of yourself, projected on me.

I would agree with you if I boasted or habitually stated that I was somehow greater than anyone in this thread. I've made it clear as possible that I truly don't believe that.

I am attempting to answer questions within the best of my ability to do so. I do not claim to have all of the answers. I apologize if they are worded wrongly. You have no obligation to this thread and my recommendation is you move on if you have a problem with it.

>>288616
I need to know more about your condition. You are in chronic pain because you were lifting and you're looking for methods to cope? Where is the pain predominantly?

If the questions is anxiety related, I can address this, but I would appreciate some more detail, please.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288640

I would recommend if you are beginning meditation that you focus on your breathing. Let me include a guide on meditation I've written for some classes, I hope it helps. These are just excerpts related to your question:

"The first thing you need to do is relax. Do not worry about anything else but relaxing.
Start with the top of your head, and relax your head.
Move down to your neck.
Relax your shoulders, and if they drop – that’s ok, you are doing well.
Relax down to the rest of your body, until your entire body is completely relaxed. You should still be in a semi-straight posture, but you should feel relaxed and calm."

"This is the first chance to really observe yourself. Above all, focus on your breathing. When your thoughts wander, observe them, and then attempt to focus on your breathing again. Focus on this as much as you can, but it is very important not to “force” anything. You will find you do not need to force thoughts – they will come up on their own. Sometimes even strong visions will appear, voices – or whatever you are able to perceive on a sub-planar or spiritual level."

"If a thought springs up, observe it closely and then return to your breathing. Your breathing should be very shallow, and your pulse very low – you should be feeling very relaxed and maybe even somewhat euphoric. If you are doing very well, you will be able to observe your thoughts and also focus on your breathing at the same time. Remember not to force anything."
>> Anonymous
>>288641
just anxiety related works too, I have TMJ so I have facial pain and the worst source of it is in my forehead which is pretty much 24/7 ice pick near my right nasal cavity(i think)

I didn't get it through lifting I'm using lifting as a way to help relieve the pain in the long run, though it increases it in the short term
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288647

Okay. Anxiety is a real tough one, when I was younger, I dealt with it for several years. I believe the trick is to isolate the transitional moment where you are feeling fine and when you are feeling anxious.

Once anxiety starts to kick in, control your breathing first. Your hyperventilation will make it progressively worse and you cannot afford to let that go on. Develop a routine for anxiety - mine was to brew a cup of herbal tea (peppermint, to calm the stomach) and apply it whenever you feel it.

Chronic pain is also a very difficult issue. My recommendation would be to not fear or attempt to suppress it, but instead really immerse yourself into it and try to feel the source of it. Become identified with how your body is feeling and if you don't resist it, you'll find it will subside more. I recommend this beyond the other medical treatments your doctor recommends for pain reduction.

Often times the mind lets us believe resistance to pain will help it subside, but if you really feel the pain, delve into the pain in the moment you're in, it can help in reducing it significantly. Try it out.
>> Anonymous
>>288646

When you say "observe your thoughts" what do you mean exactly? If a thought enters my mind, go with it to conclusion?
>> Anonymous
I would love to see your ears, counselor.
>> Anonymous
>>288659
>>288659
thanks I'll try that, and anxiety wise I don't really have anxiety attacks just high anxiety, the higher the pain the higher the anxiety. though there have been phases where I have felt better and have been anxiety free

the worse part about being in pain so constant is not being able to think clearly, or multitask with success and I've been looking for a solution to that other than the obvious thing which is to become pain free
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288663

Good question. I really mean to regard your thought without judgment. You'll find strange thoughts about everything come into your mind constantly and interrupt your meditation. It's difficult to -just- focus on your breathing and think about nothing for more than even a couple seconds. This changes with practice.

So let's take two thoughts that enter your mind during meditation:
A) "I hate this guy posting on this 4chan /fit/ thread claiming to be a spiritual counselor. What a d-bag."
B) "It was really awesome winning $5,000 today in that sweepstakes."

One thought is negative and one is positive. Attaching the "negative" or "positive" flag to the thought is the judgment portion of the thought. My recommendation is to eliminate that and instead, simply observe its there. Acknowledge that this thought has crossed your mind, and then let it pass and concentrate on your breathing.

The reason is because the negative/positive portion of your thought and judgment creates attachment to thought, which will inevitably take you away from your focus on your breathing. Thinking is incessant, and one of the goals of meditation is to put it under *your* own control, instead of just letting the mind spam you with thought after thought. Observation of your thoughts can really help you accomplish this.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288672
You can see my ears in this post:
>>288432

>>288676
I truly hope you find a way for the pain to subside. Mental discipline can help control the pain but probably cannot completely eliminate it without other methods of healing. For your general anxiety, I would recommend changing the way you breathe when you find your anxiety come on. Take long, slow breathes through your nose and exhale out your mouth instead of breathing rapidly through your nose and mouth. Create a "stop" when you feel that anxiety and pain coming on, and take a deep breath and attempt to shift your thinking back to what's important to you in that moment.
>> Anonymous
>>288678

Thanks for the elaboration. I've always been interested in meditation, though never really knew how to do it. Going to give it a try tonight.
>> Anonymous
Counselor. If you had two years left to live, what would you do?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288685
If you trust 4chan enough to leave a temporary email, AIM, or MSN contact here, I will give you the full book on meditation I wrote. If I can help elaborate on any other meditation concepts, please let me know. The key to meditation is consistency, it doesn't matter if you meditate 8 hours in one day and then none for a month. You'll gain far more by meditating just 5 minutes a day, but doing so every day.

>>288687
I believe every second of life is a gift, and I don't presume to know how long I have to live or die. It's impossible to predict how I would react to that situation. My most honest answer from an outside perspective is that I would attempt to travel and talk to as many people as I could.

The situation is an interesting hypothetical, but it may be just that. Doctor's gave Stephen Hawking roughly two years to live, with the average Lou Garrick's Disease sufferer dieing in just 18 months after diagnosis, and he has lived over 30 years after that diagnosis. When Hawking was asked about his life, his answer was, "I can't see how anyone could have possibly ever asked for more."

I hope, in a situation like that, that I could have even 5% of that attitude, and tell that to myself and others.
>> Anonymous
>>288706
What's your take on romance?
>> Anonymous
Counselor,

while you waste your time with altruism, I will follow the path of hedonism and enjoy life as much as I can. Whether other people are happy and healthy (besides my immediate family, friends, and those I care about) doesn't matter to me. After all, if everything is temporary, why should they matter anyway? The only thing that is real to me is my current existence, so that's what I shall focus on improving. I'm still young, but I hope to enjoy life as much as possible by exploring my various passions, art in the forms of music, literature, and sculpture, as well as through the enjoyment of sport and the spectation of it. Love and passion (including sex) are just icing on the cake for me. I don't get hung up on ex's because I know that the past doesn't matter, only enjoying the present. My laid back, care-free attitude only wins me more friends and admirers.

Although we both agree that some basic premises are true (like that all things are temporary), the conclusions seem to be very different. So why do you think it's necessary to help others when you could just enjoy yourself? It's not like I make it a purpose to hurt others, but I don't focus on helping the situations of others when I know that one can only really help oneself, and that my own pleasure is inherently worth more to me than the comfort of others. If other people are happy as well, more power to them, but why should I go out of my way and make myself miserable for others?
>> Anonymous
>>288725
I don't think he has said what you described. I am on a similar path as yours Anonymous, I am on the fence though, which is why I have been lurking in this thread. You don't sound like you are get pleasure out of hurting others. Do you? Do you get pleasure out of helping others? What do you think of helping others? Pointless? Why be completely self centered? Why not help people? Why would helping people be bad? I ask these questions not because I disagree with you, but because I want to come closer to making a decision of my own.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288723

Great question. We live in a country with a 60% divorce rate, so the apparent dysfunction of romance is obviously a real problem here.

I believe most people misconstrue romance by expecting their partner to give them something they can only really give themselves. These are often Maslow's Pyramid type conflicts like self-esteem or self-actualization. As Carl Jung would say, the person turns their spouse into an Archetype, and because of this, their spouse can never meet the expectations that the person has built for them, so the relationship turns to blame and fails. Both sides are doing this simultaneously, and inflicting their pain on each other because their expectations are inevitably, constantly, never met.

True romance and love does exist, but I believe it exists between two people who are conscious of themselves. When men and women get angry at each other, they become unconscious and become weapons that inflict harm upon each other. I see this in so many couples that come to me, and I ask myself, how is this love? Is love really supposed to be about cataclysmic arguments, shouting matches, and inflicting pain on each other? No, and this is not the individuals talking - this is their collective ego (upbringing, environment, and peer training) that has caused them to become this.

A conscious person can look beyond a person's momentarily anger and instead see that person for the beauty that they really are. -This- is true love, I think, accompanied with the expectation that your love is going to be human, make his/her mistakes, and will always slip up.

So in summary, true romance and love exists but is extremely rare. I've touched on a very small part of the big picture of romance here, but I hope it serves as a basis for either further questioning or a satisfactory introduction.
>> Anonymous
>>288744
>True romance and love does exist, but I believe it exists between two people who are conscious of themselves.
How would one find someone who would be conscious of them self? I feel like you can only really hold yourself up to high expectations, but how would you find someone that feels the same way? Romance seems dangerous to me.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288725
A good question, first, please read my response to a similar question here:
>>288450

That said, your path is truly no greater or lesser than my own. You and I have come to the same realization and reached different conclusions. You have come to the conclusion that life is what you make of it, so you might as well enjoy it.

Therefore, I would appreciate if you treated the next part of my answer as complete preference/opinion of my own view. This is not the "correct" view, it's just my own.

I believe that:
1) You gain the greatest happiness for yourself -through- helping others. If you accept that there is no such thing as altruism (and many do) and that all human beings are inherently driven towards their own best interests, then you may be able to accept under that premise that I am doing this because I believe it is of greatest benefit to me.
2) After the mental practice of detachment, I came to the conclusion that how I spend my time is completely my own choice. My next logical progression was to teach, and to help others, following a period of -severe- Nihilism/depression lasting almost a year. I came to this conclusion because I realized I had so much to be grateful for, and that I was so lucky that I was alive.

Individual results may vary. Understand that my hedonism -is- my altruism. I don't expect, nor encourage everyone else to be like that. It isn't "the higher path." It just is. Society puts that definition on it. The world has no such illusions - we simply are here for the time we are and that's it. I choose to live it in this way.
>> Anonymous
>>288756
What are your sources? I want to know how you learned your insights and maybe try them for myself.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288751

All change is potentially dangerous, and accepting someone into your life is change.

Finding a person who is intensely present and conscious of their actions requires that you yourself are first conscious, usually. Focus on improving yourself and empowering yourself first.

As lame as it may sound, the law of attraction does exist, and women and men both are attracted to self-empowered, actualized people who have confidence in themselves. If you want to meet the right person for you, start right with your own heart before you attempt to win anothers.
>> Anonymous
>>288739

I don't get pleasure out of hurting others, in fact, I feel guilty and sad if I hurt another person. I do get pleasure out of helping others, if they show gratitude, we become closer friends or have a better more positive relationship because of it, or if something positive happens because of it. However, I don't see the point of spending time I could be using to enjoy myself with those people and passions I truly care about helping others that aren't going to appreciate the help and make me feel good for helping, or reward me in some way (even if it is by simply saying "thank you", or maybe if it is a girl, by giving me a kiss on the cheek). I don't see helping others as pointless, but unless the person being helped is an exception to the general human being who doesn't display much gratitude for help, or is someone I already care about, I simply see it as somewhat of a waste of time. If we agree all things are temporary, then I simply want to enjoy my life as much as I can during that time (and no, I don't resort to drugs, or things of that sort that will only give you temporary happiness).

And I want to restate my belief that the person most able to institute change in one's life is that same person. Although OP may be positively impacting the lives of those around him, he is not doing nearly as much as those same people could do for themselves if only they could, or chose to, adopt better ways of life.

Continued...
>> Anonymous
>>288765
lol sources for that?
>> Anonymous
And I want to restate my belief that the person most able to institute change in one's life is that same person. Although OP may be positively impacting the lives of those around him, he is not doing nearly as much as those same people could do for themselves if only they could, or chose to, adopt better ways of life.

If a person is faced with a situation in which they are born and can choose to either a) spend their life attempting to enjoy themself (with a great ability to manifest change because they are trying to improve their OWN life) or b) spend their life attempting to improve the quality of life of others (but not as capably as they would be able to change their own life), what should an individual do? Well, if we seek the greatest net quality of life for all of humanity, then as long as we have a society in which one person's quality of life isn't inversely related to the quality of life of another, then everyone should seek to improve their own lives. If we all went around trying to improve others, we wouldn't get nearly as much accomplished. Perhaps you'll argue that in this world, the ambitions and seflishness of a few make working for one's own pleasure a net negative, but I believe that with the measure of ethics and morality that we do currently have, the negative qualites of those that are corrupt are overshadowed by the positve of the majority of moral, ethical people. So in the end for me, it makes more sense for everyone to try to feel good, and not worry as much about how everyone in the neighborhood is doing. It's much easier to keep tabs on one's self than to sit in front of a bunch of monitors and watch everyone else.

For the record, I'm not really an extreme hedonist although I may have spoken that way in my first post. I simply think that OP is going over the top with his whole "sacrifice my time to help others" thing.
>> Anonymous
>>288769
I have no experience in romance. Should I continue to work towards what you described? Should I try to get experience in this?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288765
Start by reading these books here:
>>288168

Beyond that, I outlined my study of religious texts here:
>>288114

The answer beyond that is just time devoted. I learned the most from teaching myself, once I had the background and was fairly well-read. I've read so many books, talked to so many people, meditated for hours, and as I said, completely devoted my life to the pursuit of enlightenment and the empowerment of others.

Despite all of the above, the only thing I know for sure is I pretty much don't know anything. The pursuit is worth it though, for me, there's no better way to spend my time.
>> Anonymous
>>288756

a very reasonable response, and to be honest, as I typed my own post I figured you'd probably just say that what gave you the most happiness and pleasure was helping others.

I can understand the pleasure of helping another when they show gratitude, but what makes you feel good about helping someone when they don't care, or your help doesn't actually help at all? What if your help only ends up harming more than it does good?

If everything is temporary, then why do the conditions of others even matter?
>> Anonymous
>>288778
>For the record, I'm not really an extreme hedonist although I may have spoken that way in my first post. I simply think that OP is going over the top with his whole "sacrifice my time to help others" thing.
Well I don't think he has. He is sitting at his computer enjoying talking about HIMSELF and giving HIS advice, as well as have interesting questions asked. He went for a swim in a lake a little while ago, then he had lunch. He isn't a masochistic catholic whipping his back with a whip made of sympathy.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288778
Your points are definitely legitimate and valid. As I said before, my choice of lifestyle is simply my own. This is pertinent to your response..
>> "
I believe that:
1) You gain the greatest happiness for yourself -through- helping others. If you accept that there is no such thing as altruism (and many do) and that all human beings are inherently driven towards their own best interests, then you may be able to accept under that premise that I am doing this because I believe it is of greatest benefit to me.
2) After the mental practice of detachment, I came to the conclusion that how I spend my time is completely my own choice. My next logical progression was to teach, and to help others, following a period of -severe- Nihilism/depression lasting almost a year. I came to this conclusion because I realized I had so much to be grateful for, and that I was so lucky that I was alive.

Individual results may vary. Understand that my hedonism -is- my altruism. I don't expect, nor encourage everyone else to be like that. It isn't "the higher path." It just is. Society puts that definition on it. The world has no such illusions - we simply are here for the time we are and that's it. I choose to live it in this way."

>>288779
Can you tell me more about yourself first and how you feel about your current life situation? How important is romance to you, and how important is self-actualization?
>> Anonymous
>>288788

I suppose my argument can be fairly easily defeated by the simple suggestion that helping others is simply a past-time for him. I guess I've been arguing against a straw-man (or in this case, a self-flagellating man I suppose).

But still, I respect "The Counselor" for his choice to help others and make a conscious effort to improve the world. I guess moderation once again wins the day.

But still, I can't say I totally agree with his philosophy. Doesn't really matter that much though does it.
>> Anonymous
>>288725

I'll jump in here.

There comes a profound sense of betterment and fulfillment with helping others, especially if they are complete strangers.

You feel a unique, strong sense of purpose in helping those of which you *know* will not offer *anything* in return. Why? This has been a subject of scientific and religious debate for hundreds of years. The one unmistakable and irrefutable fact is the *feeling* you get in doing random acts of kindness.

Yes, you won't last. Those around won't last either. Whether you believe in the afterlife or any other religiously similar belief is your choice. The one thing that *will* last is how people will remember you. How people will act towards your immediate kin as a result of some random favor you did for them. Is this something that hasn't crossed your mind?

This is really one of those things that you will truly understand once you try it yourself.

I personally believe that this the true value of a human being...the willingness to help those of which will offer nothing in return.
>> Anonymous
>>288791

you win good sir. have a good life. I will put all of my efforts towards doing so. literally. well not literally, I mean I suppose everyone helps others once in a while, ;)
>> The Chancellor
>>288794
From what I can tell, you seem to be jealous of the The Counselor.
>> Anonymous
>>288791
>Can you tell me more about yourself first
I'm young (19). I am male. I'm going to college.
>and how you feel about your current life situation?
I feel pretty good about it. I'm not satisfied, I think it's dangerous to feel satisfied. I can get moody sometimes, but I think I'm doing fairly well for myself. I've been going through a huge period of exploring who I am. I've read a lot about religion, read religious debates. I've been exploring politics recently. And VERY recently I have decided to build strength, and general fitness (which is how I came to /fit/).
> How important is romance to you
I don't know. I used to fantasize about being in a loving relationship, and being a father. Then I got older and stopped doing that as much. Every now and then I'll end up watching a romantic movie and really getting caught up emotionally in it. But I don't trust myself when I get emotional, so I end up rationalizing, and analyzing things away. I try to empower myself with positive happy emotions, don't think I'm emotionless... I just have a tendency to stifle my emotions.
>, and how important is self-actualization?
I think everyone who understands what you mean by that wants to reach that point. Self-actualization is a priority to me. I want to progressively become a better person.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288784
I believe if I focused on the specific conditions of every instance that I helped people, I would probably be paralyzed by analysis. The very knowledge that moments are so temporary does not give me time to worry about that sort of thing. I can only do the best that I can with the moment I have.

Do the conditions matter? Does the overlying result, where we go when we die, and if we do, matter? Not to me, no - because there is only the present moment and what we do with. Anything further is contemplation on the future, and since I can't predict what will happen as a result of my actions, but I have to act in some way, I might as well act in the way that is the best way to act within my own perception.

>>288788
Hit the nail on the head.
>> Anonymous
>>288796
"The one thing that *will* last is how people will remember you. How people will act towards your immediate kin as a result of some random favor you did for them. Is this something that hasn't crossed your mind?"

Most strangers wouldn't change how they act towards your immediate kin, being that they are strangers and strangers generally don't know who you are well enough to identify and thank your kin. Furthermore, most random acts of kindness by their very nature do not beget rememberance in such a sense. I thought the whole point of random acts of kindness was in the feeling you get from helping "those of which you *know* will not offer *anything* in return", isn't an offering of thanks to your kin an example of something given in return?

All thing being temporary, even remembrance will fade away. 100 years after the fact, no one will be thinking about the guy who held open the door.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288794
Our paths are different but of the same importance, so no, it doesn't really matter, ultimately. :)

>>288798
Helping others is not the only way to happiness. It can be anything. For Jesus in the beginning of his life, it was carpentry, and then teaching. For the Buddha, it was the middle way, and teaching his own path. For my Grandfather, it was fishing. Mine happens to be service to others, there are a thousand ways to happiness, and it is your task alone to find what yours is.
>> Anonymous
>>288799

The Chancellor? lolllll nice.

But yeah, I suppose I am somewhat jealous of his seeming sense of well-being and confidence. He clearly has his shit together, who wouldn't be impressed? But don't worry, I won't be losing any sleep trying to figure out how to be more like him. I don't really even know anything about him. This is 4chan. How much of a picture can you really get of a person here? I come here to pretend to be someone I'm not, and to learn.
>> The Chancellor
>>288810
I thought it was funny too, haha.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288801
My recommendation is that you take the next summer between your college semesters off and travel to a place you've never been before, preferably far away. I think this will greatly increase your confidence while simultaneously allowing you to become more accepting of change.

And then, yes, pursue the changes aforementioned. Take the time to meditate, to enjoy the small things in life, and find simple appreciation in at least one thing per day. Be grateful.

>>288807
Exactly, your second point kind of refutes your first one. Remembrance will fade away, and while I could center on that potentially depressing concept, I could also accept it as an inevitability (that memories of me will eventually fade away.) and pursue my life in the best way I know. The later is my personal preference.

It is -because- change is inevitable, because death is inevitable, and because everything is temporary that each moment is so valuable, not worthless.
>> Anonymous
I've revised my math.

If everyone gained happiness by helping others, and everyone also recieved happiness by the help of others, then the net happiness would actually be greater than if everyone simply attempted to make themselves happier. What a beautiful world that would be.

That's the sort of relationship I'd want to have with a woman some day. I attempt to make her happy and she attempts to make me happy, and we are both even happier because of the way we are helping each other. That's love.
>> Anonymous
>>288068
Counselor--
I go to 4chan for the lulz. While much of what I see on this site is despicable I feel so alive after being able to laugh heartily at so many things. Should I continue?
>> Anonymous
>>288808
Hi, Mr. Counselor. Have been reading through your posts and have been enjoying it very much so far, I love chances to debate and think about such topics to which you have brought up. I have but one question that relates to your post aforementioned, and it's a question that has bugged me for a long time. How do you begin to search for such a thing?
>> Anonymous
What the fuck is all this crap...
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288817
>>288810
4chan is a strange mode of communication for this type of talk, but surprisingly there are a lot of people here that could use it. In more than one way, I'm one of them.

4chan is neither "bad" nor "good," not really. It's what you get out of it, and how much you put into it. If you're devoting your life to trolling the website, you may want to consider cutting back. If you enjoy it for a casual hour or two on a Saturday afternoon, it's not very different from any other activity.

>>288814
Yes. And this is completely possible. Despite what you may hear/read, it does exist, through exactly the means you just described.
>> Anonymous
>>288821

A discussion of enlightment, martial arts, and altruism and it's merits.

In your /fit/.

Lol.


But seriously, (hedonist arguing guy here) it's been interesting both from a philosophical standpoint and from a debate standpoint to speak with you Counselor. In fact, I don't disagree really with all that much you believe, I simply haven't found avenues in which to help people that I particularly enjoy. Good luck with whatever future endeavors you embark upon, and I wish you only the best.

Now I'm gonna go read Game of Thrones.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288820

Probably the most pertinent question someone can ask about this subject.

The corny sounding answer is, truthfully, you already have begun. By asking a question here, by reading these posts, by internalizing in yourself that this is an important set of concepts you need to learn about - you've begun.

For actual, daily practices on beginning, see here:
>>288551

Each second you spend towards begin conscious of your present moment, you are practicing, you are beginning. Every second you spend feeling your hands under the water as you wash them, or the pressure on your feet as you walk, you're existing in the present moment. You're becoming spiritually actually. You are constantly beginning.

That is why I refer to what I do, and what I'm talking about here, as "practice." This is described very well in "The Way of the Peaceful Warrior" by Dan Millman. The journey -is- the beginning and end.

The #1 thing that stops people from becoming spiritually actualized is they are seeking their answer externally when, in reality, everything they need is already right there. They're already completely actualized, they've just tricked themselves into believing they are not.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288825
Thank you very much for your time. My best wishes for your continued happiness.
>> Anonymous
>>288813
>My recommendation is that you take the next summer between your college semesters off and travel to a place you've never been before, preferably far away. I think this will greatly increase your confidence while simultaneously allowing you to become more accepting of change.

What about doing that do you think will make me more confident, and accepting of change?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288833
To better answer your question, could you tell me your history of traveling out of country so far?
>> Anonymous
You guys are trying way too hard to sound deep and interesting
>> Anonymous
Here's my question Counselor:

I get extremely nervous before tests, exams, tournaments, etc..
To the point that I feel physically ill.
Do you have some idea how I can cope with this extreme nervousness/fear?
>> Anonymous
>>288834
>To better answer your question, could you tell me your history of traveling out of country so far?
I've lived in one state for MOST of my life. Only last year did I ever venture further out to two other states. I have never been to another country.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288838
My recommendation is to start by reading this response:
>>288659

Next, the best thing you can do during a very stressful situation like an upcoming test is establish some kind of mental block that will stop your negative thought-process and bring you "back down to Earth."

The easiest way I know of to do this is to control your breathing. Use the technique I outlined in a previous post to inhale deeply through your nose and exhale through your mouth. At the second you feel that nervousness, do your exercise and center yourself back on the present moment, where you are right now. At that point, remind yourself this test is not your life, or even likely important to your life (and believe me, it isn't, even if it's an ACT/SAT, standardized examinations are never the end of your life.) and that you will not even remember it in a month or two.

One technique I like to use is to ask myself, "in ten years, is this really going to matter?" The answer is very rarely yes. If you are focusing on your breathing and ask yourself that question about a test, it should help a lot.
>> Anonymous
I've been reading this thread off and on all night, and am rather impressed with this stray benevolent poster. I am not sure why, but I was partly saddened to hear you were 23. I think it was somewhat due to that I imagined you were much older to have gathered such wise advice - and somewhat due to me being about a dozen years older than you and spiritually retarded.

I think you impressed a lot of people tonight and I would hope that you come back often. As someone mentioned above, typical around here is a certain level of depravity. Your post was a nice island of sanity to rest at.

I have put the books mentioned above on my Amazon wish list and will buy one or two this next week based on your recommendation.

Thanks for your time tonight.
WC
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288839
This is what I suspected, but I didn't want to incorrectly presume before I gave you an answer.

I have utterly no interest or benefit in insulting you, but I want to tell you that from your synopsis of yourself it does seem like you are unconsciously resistant to change and uncertainty. This is *completely* normal, and if you have the power to admit this to yourself, (assuming its true) you are already very far along.

The reason why traveling will subside your fear of change is because traveling alone is a great ordeal. Even going to a place like Europe, fending yourself for a month, will teach you so much, I can't even begin to tell you. You will come back here and teach me, that's how much it'll change your life.

Simultaneously, knowing you accomplished something as paramount as this will increase your confidence. You will know you conquered something extraordinary, and your experience will give you confidence. You will learn so much about yourself and other people, and it will shift your perspective of the world.

Travel is probably one of the best ways you can spend monetary income. Especially for someone in your position - this will be so beneficial, get out of your comfort zone, and immerse yourself in something truly challenging like going to another country. You will not regret it.
>> Anonymous
>>288846
>I have utterly no interest or benefit in insulting you, but I want to tell you that from your synopsis of yourself it does seem like you are unconsciously resistant to change and uncertainty. This is *completely* normal, and if you have the power to admit this to yourself, (assuming its true) you are already very far along.
Would you find pointing out to me what part of my post you got that from? That would be interesting to me.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288845
I am truly grateful to you for this post. These types of writings, for me, validate the entire experience of being here. My age has always been the first barrier people meet when talking with me, and here it is a little easier to circumvent.

Thank you so much for your wonderful post, and I don't think I have to tell you that you aren't spiritually retarded. You are an incredible person, and you are the miracle of life. We're equals, I promise you this.

I hope the books serve you. They are wonderful gateways into a lesser known lifestyle.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288850
I apologize in advance for the corny response, but I didn't attain the information from your post. I took a summary of what you've told me and asked myself and the collective unconscious what would be the best way to serve you. My answer was that you should travel.

It would be a very long and involved process attempting to explain to you how exactly this information came to me, and would likely result in three times the flames I've been normally getting.

That said, I mentioned my analysis may be ambiguous, but I will tell you it's a fair bet. Even if it isn't, I think you will gain huge benefit by traveling accompanied with the practices I recommended. You are a seeker, and seeking is important, but so is action within seeking. Challenge yourself to rise above your norm.
>> Anonymous
>>288856
I second this.
There's nothing like taking yourself way out of your element to change your perceptions.
>> Anonymous
>>288856
Well I don't really think I'm abnormally resistant to change. I love doing new crap all the time. The other day I went fishing for the first time. I love to challenge my opinions, and question my conclusions. That's a huge part of who I am today. Things are too uncertain for me to say "this is the way things are" or "this is the truth". I'd probably benefit from what you said, but who wouldn't? That was a pretty vague and mumbojumbly post that you last gave. Thank you for your advice though.
>> Anonymous
>>288853

Thank you. As an aside, I have to ask - what made you come to 4chan today. You said you started out in /B, but didn't do so well there. Then you came here.

Why 4chan, and why /fit/? I am glad you did, but it seems an unlikely path.

thanks,
WC
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288866
I hope my answer serves you. I have given you the best answer to your question I can.

Seems like the questions are finally winding down. I am still open to answer any questions. Is there anything else anyone would like to know?
>> Anonymous
>>288870
I don't think there is anything else I can get from your answers. I've been lurking from the beginning of the thread. Thank you for the interesting stuff. Goodbye.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288869
I visit 4chan occasionally, /b/ and /fit/ specifically, but never post. Last night during my meditation before rest, an inclination came to me to post this thread on /b/, and then move it to /fit/ if it didn't go over well. Sure enough, the sheer amount of volume on /b/ buried the thread pretty quickly, and it didn't get a lot of exposure.

When I brought it to /fit/, the response was suspicious, but evolved into a truly great thread (I hope) that taught me a lot.

Many people who are spiritually inclined often get suggestions that are not their own. I call these suggestions and inclinations messages from Jung's idea of the collective unconscious, but I don't truly know where they are from.

Posting here was one such inclination. I don't know if I will ever return after this thread goes down. I feel like some people have definitely benefited from the discussion, and that's great - everything I could ever ask for.
>> Anonymous
Dumb question.

I think I place way to much importance on sex.

I am not a virgin, but have not been laid in like a year.

I started going out with this one girl and fucked it up cause I was so nervous I could not get aroused.

It haunts me everyday and makes me feel like shit.

I dunno...have and advice?
>> Anonymous
>>288878

here.

Fuck did he leave?
>> Anonymous
>>288880
He just types a lot. Be patient.
>> Anonymous
>>288885

sorry, my bad.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288874
Thank you for reading. If you've been here since the beginning, I think you're right.

>>288878
This is not a dumb question. Society puts an incredible emphasis on the importance of sex, and it is human nature to be driven towards reproduction. Beyond that, there is no reason to despair, really, and the two above reasons aren't that legitimate to worry about either.

First of all, either sex you are dealt, there are three billion of the opposite one in the world. For this reason alone, you should never really get fixated on the fact that you failed with girl X/Y, there's just too much opportunity out there, and your lack of confidence from previous relationships will turn you (and your potentials) off from future ones.

My advice to you is to drop your definition of how you are sexually. Produce a completely fresh image of yourself and move forward with it. Do not judge yourself by past events, because you are -not- your past, you are your -now.- Your now is always different, and so are you.

You are not a "loser" because you haven't had sex in a year, or ten years, or never. You are many things beyond your relationships with women - and when in doubt, fixate on the other strengths you can find in yourself. When you do this, the byproduct will be that you find your relationships better by virtue of your increased actualization.
>> Anonymous
You say you aren't a virgin but you really sound like one. How did your last sexual encounter go? Was it bad and you were scarred for life?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288885
>>288886
Still here, as long as the questions are coming.
>> Anonymous
>>288887

Seriously, dude thanks for the advice.

I am just so nervous the same shit will happen when I am in the same situation again.

I think a big part of my nervousness is the gf I had awhile ago. She cheated on me and that has seem to fuck with real deep.
>> Anonymous
>>288876

Why do you not think you will come back?
>> Anonymous
>>288889

My last girl I went out with, we where together about 2 years. I thought everything was cool, got cheated on and it kind of rocked the foundation of my self esteem.

Fast forward a year later, was about to get laid and all the bad memories came back, and just had no confidence.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288893
No trouble, thank you. I was cheated on when I was younger by a woman, also. The trick is to not identify with this personally. This is not your life, remember I posted about this earlier. This is your life situation. Your life situation is not YOU, it is what happens to you.

Even if you are cheated on 20 times, and your life philosophy has changed to "I don't trust anyone that bleeds for seven days and doesn't die" - the next woman you meet could be the love of your life. Only you can truly limit what opportunity happens to you.

Don't give your life situation the chance to rule you. Put your faith into your life, and put your positive attitude into your life situation and it -will- improve.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288894
I don't know if I will come back or not. Suffice to say, I am normally teaching seminars and giving talks to larger groups of people, and I set aside a significant amount of time this Saturday to help out here. (Though I left in between, it's probably somewhere around 7-8 hours.)

I enjoy the community here, and there have been some truly amazing people that have graced this thread. If you personally are interested in keeping in contact with me, then you can provide an MSN/AIM or temporary e-mail address here and we can keep in touch, if you'd like.
>> Anonymous
>>288901

Thank you.

Also unrelated to the sex question: How do you feel about Krav Maga?
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288907
Great question. I've trained against people who wield the art effectively, and done a little bit of training in it myself.

Krav Magra is part of a family of martial arts that is simple, brutal, and effective. It has a lot of similarities to KFM (Keysei Fighting Method) and is a vicious tool for street fighting or when being confronted by multiple opponents.

Krav Magra was progenitor'd by the Israeli military, who designed it as a means to quickly incapacitate or kill enemies. Make no mistake, this is not Judo/Aikido, this is a direct killing art. As such, it may not be viable for use in self-defense in the states, as police response times are not in your favor unless you are good at Ninjitsu or Parkour.

I suppose if you need to take on a unit of special forces for some reason, being a master of Krav Magra is a good path to follow. I prefer to keep to the more peaceful way of Aiki-budo, but it's a choice of preference at that point, really.
>> Anonymous
>>288906

Hey counselor,

It's the guy that asked about Muay Thai a couple hundred posts ago...again :)

Never thought the thread would last this long.

I would be extremely delighted if you would some send me your contact info to this temporary email address:

sdsubb@gmail.com

Thanks in advance...looking forward to hearing from you!
>> Anonymous
>>288912

Again, thanks for your time. Your thread proves that 4chan does not have to be flame wars all the time. We can actually have great threads.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288920

Sent.

>>288921

Thank you very much. I really appreciate it. If you've gained some benefit from this, that's huge for me.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
All right,

Looks like the thread is winding down. I'll stay for a few minutes longer and we'll let this disappear into memory.
>> Anonymous
Have you ever been in a real fight?

Do you sell your students a viable self-defense system, or simply a sport?

What life experience do you have, to be a spiritual counselor?
>> Anonymous
>>288887
>you are -not- your past, you are your -now.- Your now is always different, and so are you.
I'm not the person you responded to, but that's a pretty interesting way of thinking about things.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288931
1) Yes. I made some very poor and arrogant decisions through high school and early college and often got in street fights, the majority of which, I lost.

2) Neither. If a student is dedicated to coming to class, they can opt to take the class free. Otherwise, the individual cost of the student is $5-$15, depending on how much they decide to pay (I recommend they pay based on their income level.) I try to teach a way of life, not a sport or fighting art. Those two things are components of instruction, though.

3) Please see above 200 posts. I will choose not to legitimize or falsify my qualifications, because they are irrelevant. What you get from these words is what is important, not who I actually am. The Buddha did not have any qualifications, nor did Jesus, or Martin Luther King, they were people with purpose. I am not close to the greatness of these people, but these are arbitrary examples to illustrate the point. I do have purpose, to help others. I have no idea how bad I am at that, I may be terrible, but I try simply because it is my way.

Around for a few more minutes.
>> Anonymous
>>288947
Thanks chief.

Perhaps I layered my questions will ill intent- I am of the opinion, that no martial art can be completely effective in defending yourself, and as such it is important to differentiate between "perceived advantage" and "false confidence" in a physical altercation/ situation.

Eg: A 110lb female, who knows to target weak points on the human body, will still get raped in a dark alley 9/10, regardless of her years of training, unless she is a champion striker in a competitive field with live sparring, i doubt she can effectively dissuade an attacker.

Since most fights go to the ground, knowing how to armbar from bottom or reverse position, pass guard, etc- would be a lot more useful than 30 move katas.


With regards to the philosophy, words without actions cloud even the clearest of skies.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
>>288963


I referenced this a little here:
>>288334

There are limitations to all things, we act within the boundaries of the reality we are in. However, I do not believe the inherent limitations of something should prevent us from practicing it, that's like saying I shouldn't use a knife to cut through an apple because it won't cut through diamond.

At some point, martial arts becomes about avoiding fights in the first place, and being aware of your surroundings so that you can control a situation even if you cannot control the attacker. I've watched poorly-built fighters take down larger opponents with superior agility and throwing multiple objects.

You can't do much if a meteor is going to fall on you, no, but life is about percentages in this case. You're lowering your percentage chance to get in a bad situation with martial arts, but completely eliminating the chance is almost impossible.
>> The Counselor !2dC8hbcvNA
And so ends my time on this thread.

I wish you all the very best of lives and times, and thank you all.
>> Anonymous
i make enough money to buy a house, and now that prices are dropping like crazy everyone is pressuring me to buy
i make great money
but the truth is, i hate my job and debate quitting everyday

i really want to travel and live somewhere else
what should i do
>> Anonymous
do a barrel roll
>> blah
>>289004

You already know the answer to this.

The first step to helping others is by helping yourself. Ignoring that you do not enjoy how you're currently living is not a viable way to happiness.

Best,
blah