File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Alright /fit/, I have a Herculean task for you:
Get my ass into shape. Don't worry about motivation, I just need some direction based on a few guidelines:

* I'm 6'2, 180 lbs.
* I have reasonable upper body strength and endurance (able to pass the APFT pushup test in 2 minutes), but no tone or bulk whatsoever.
* My stomach is a mess. I used to have a decently toned six pack, but I'm developing a small tire now.
* A year ago I was running ten miles three times a week, now I get winded after 20 minutes of full-court basketball.
* I make very little money, so even moderately expensive healthy food, a gym membership, or workout equipment is completely out of the question.
* As stated above, I have no workout equipment.
* Time of day is not a constraint.

So... where do I start? I need a routine or something, I want to bulk up my shoulders/chest/arms, tone my stomach, and get back into good cardiovascular shape.

Pic related, it's how I feel after not working out for a solid six months.
>> Anonymous
bump
>> Anonymous
>* I make very little money, so even moderately expensive healthy food, a gym membership, or workout equipment is completely out of the question.
You don't need to pay alot for healthy food, and you don't need a gym to become fit.

Get your ass back in shape, start running, don't push yourself TOO hard.

Also like many retards in /fit/ (You may or may not be a retard), you might be drinking soda and chomping on chips (or crisps if you're in England or something).
Throw all that shit out the window.
>> Anonymous
La dee da.

You cannot bulk and cut weight at the same time, decide what you want to do first.

If you decide to bulk, then a full workout routine with compound exercises should put that size onto your body, but since you have no exercise equipment, you might as well not worry about that.

So the best you can do is start doing some HIIT and Bodyweight Exercises on and off, every other day.

Here is a good bodyweight routine.

http://www.trainforstrength.com/workout1.shtml

Do that three times a week, Mon/Wed/Fri, and do some HIIT Tues/Thur/Sat at the track.

I didn't know if you wanted nutritional advice, so I just skipped that shit.
>> Anonymous
Kineologist here.

I'm gay. Glad I finally came out.
>> Anonymous
>>Get my ass into shape. Don't worry about motivation, I just need some direction based on a few guidelines:

For this kind of mess, really... all of its been written down here:

http://www.themedicalhelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=199

http://www.themedicalhelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=224

http://www.themedicalhelp.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=311
>> Anonymous
>>125467
And this is why I spend only 1 day here every 6 months or so :P
>> Anonymous
>>125485

Alright then, see you again in six months
>> Anonymous
>>125462
This is fantastic, thank you. I'm going to start this after work today.

>>125458
Oh yeah, no soda. Forgot about that.
>> Anonymous
Speaking of the no-brainers like no sodas, chips, etc, how should I be dieting while exercising/bulking? Carbs? Meat? Vegetable crap? Whey protein shakes?

And then what? How does the cutting process work?
>> Anonymous
I'm a former fatass who puts on fat like a mother fucker, so I have to watch everything I eat.

If you have a slower metabolism, you could dirty bulk while bulking. Here's the thing, unless you get access to a gym, you don't want to bulk. You aren't going to gain significant muscle mass doing bodyweight exercises, unless you go to jail and can workout for eight hours a day.

Bulking is just eating a calorie surplus, while cutting is creating a calorie deficit. You want to gain weight, eat more than you burn, you want to lose weight, burn more than you need.

Honestly, don't pay attention to all of the FABULOUS NEW-LOW CARB HIGH PROTEIN SEMEN DIETS, they're for women.

The only specialized diet I recommend is the Anabolic Diet, because that's fucking awesome, but besides that, just eat what you believe to be healthy. You're a human being, you don't have to be told these things.

As for cutting, eat six meals a day, shitloads of water.

Eggs (eat that yolk nigger, no correlation between dietary cholesterol and heart disease), chicken, yams, oatmeal, tuna, flax-seed oil, brown rice, any type of fish, turkey, all types of veggies (cept corn), and fruit.

Careful with that fruit though, the sugar's a bitch. Six small meals a day will shoot your fucking metabolism into overdrive. Green Tea is great for cutting weight also, great for cleaning out the body.

Fuck me, I might add something, I haven't slept all night. If something doesn't make sense, just ask, or ask for more detail.
>> Anonymous
>>125498
I'm lucky enough to have a very fast metabolism. Right now I can get away with eating just about anything without it being noticeable, so cutting is no problem.

The anabolic diet looks good too. I don't have to gargle buckets of man seed every meal, which is always a plus.

And now for the $64,000 question: Cut or bulk first?
Aside from some of the obvious fat deposits around my midline, I'm fairly trim. It wouldn't take me long to cut with a few weeks of exercise, but I don't know which is better to do first.
>> Anonymous
I apologize for avoiding the bulking advice, I thought you wanted to cut. You weigh as much as I do, and I'm seven inches shorter. Bulking, is the route I would go, simply because the muscle you add will help burn the new fat, and the old fat off, much easier than before.

But you have to remember I was a fatass and the idea of shoving food down my mouth is orgasmic. You have to realize, if you aren't destroying your body when bulking, you will gain more muscle than fat. This means heavy compound exercises, you don't want to just isolate your upper body. Deadlifting put more meat onto my biceps and back than any amount of curls or pulls ever did, and you will notice it also, if you give it a chance.

Honestly, if you can put up with a little more fat, I would bulk. But you need a gym.

If you decide to bulk, I'll get you a good starter routine. Remember, you can do HIIT when bulking to minimize fat gain, and start the push towards becoming getting back into great cardio shape.
>> Anonymous
>>125514

>becoming getting

hur dur dur im a fucking retard
>> Anonymous
>>125514
Then bulking it is. I've already got a nice place in my neighborhood picked out to do some HIIT jogging/sprinting to keep the fat off.
>> Anonymous
>>125516
Last I checked this was /fit/, not /grammarnazis/.
>> Anonymous
Uh, question. How'd you go from "I have no money, so no food + exercise equipment" to bulking, which is basically you having to spend more money on more food (since you have a fast metabolism, you'll have to eat a lot to maintain a surplus) and now having a gym?

Anyway, there are two workout routines I would recommend.

Rippletoe's.
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=998224

Westside.
http://www.defrancostraining.com/articles/archive/articles_westside.htm

Both are amazing, Rippletoe is pure power-lifting, while Westside is an athlete minded routine.

Don't get the idea that you should jump into a bodybuilders routine, you need to gain strength before you will be able to isolate muscle, and destroy them through direct exercises. Full compounds will give you amazing gains, especially if this will be your first time weight-lifting.
>> Anonymous
>>125520

That was me making fun of my own mistake.
>> Anonymous
>>125423
what's the APFT pushup test?
>> Anonymous
>>125531

http://www.army.com/enlist/push-ups.html

If you are a female, between the ages 27 and 31, you must do at least 10 push ups in two minutes in order to pass this event.

lol women
>> Anonymous
>>125534

even the requirements for men are just as low. who the fuck cant do 71 pushups in 2 minutes, 78 situps in 2 minutes and run 2 miles in 13 minutes.
>> Anonymous
>>126312

80% of America

FUCK YEAH
>> Anonymous
>>126314

>>126312here
i guess that puts me into the top 20% of america.