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A girl with a failing sex drive? Anonymous
Apologies if this isn't a good topic for this board...

So it's like this, my girlfriend literally hasn't gotten horny or been aroused in 2 months. That might not sound that alarming, but this is from a girl who used to masturbate 5-6 times a week and love to have sex.

At first I thought "oh yeah, you're cheating or not interested in me anymore." but after talking to all of our mutual friends, and her friends (both male and female) they're all giving me simular answers that...yeah...she's just...not aroused at all anymore.

When I last talked to her about it she said she isn't concerned at all and that it will pass - Isn't that something an individual, especially a women would be concerned about? Any ideas or advise?

Picture obviously unrelated.
>> Anonymous
>>77834

>Pic related. It's me.

Fixed for you. No wonder her sex drive is failing?
>> Anonymous
>>77837

Lulz.
>> Anonymous
Is she taking any drugs? I mean like antidepressants or contraceptives.. They can really fuck with your sex drive.

Has your physical appearance changed since you met? Have you put on or lost a lot of weight? Has she?
>> Anonymous
Ok she's controlling you by withholding sex and when you ask she probably blames it on you or something else like work.

This might be hard but just STOP asking or doing anything sexual. If she comes on to you after few weeks then don't give in act like you got shit to do and by that i mean do something to keep yourself busy. work, sports, gym etc

Trust me, she willbe craving sex like no tomorrow.
>> Anonymous
>>77840

She's been like this for the past 8 weeks, but she was put on antidepressants for the first time last week. She has lost weight lately (15lbs-ish?), but other than that, no neither of our appearences have changed.
>> Anonymous
yeah is she on any drugs my wife is on depo lupron and after about a year it is supposed to decrease sex drive
>> Anonymous
>>77845

That does sound like something the typical girl would do. Do they often do this? (On a side-note she doesn't really seem to be getting any pleasure from my suffering.)
>> Anonymous
>>77847

I've heard that antidepressants can kill sex drive pretty effectively. If memory serves though, Wellbutrin or something like that is a fairly common antidepressant that's supposed to leave the sex drive intact.
>> Anonymous
RAPE
>> Anonymous
>>77853

She's on Lexapro now, but what about the other 7 weeks? =\
>> Anonymous
>>77847
Depression can really fuck with someone's sex drive, too... Hmm.

>>77845also makes a good point. I've had guys withhold sex on me because I wasn't doing what they wanted to do... If this is the case then you both likely need to learn to communicate better.
>> Anonymous
Brother, I was with a girl that was like this.

Guess what? It will never end. You will be in a sexless relationship until you break up with her, or become such a mess that she breaks up with you.

Get out while you can.
>> Anonymous
>>77857

She was put on the pills to relieve her anger, not her sadness. (Not sure if that means anything) Yeah, if she's holding sex from me for her personal gratitude she's not really the kind of person I wanna be involved with.
>> Anonymous
>>77858

Fantastic. -.-
>> play !3rZQiXcf5A
>>77847
I'm assuming she was put on antidepressants because she was depressed, yes?

Unhappy girls aren't always all that into sex.
>> Anonymous
>>77864
See
>>77860

She wasn't sad, just easily irritable and pissy.
>> Anonymous
>>77864

I can see why you wouldn't wanna have sex while angry, too, though.
>> play !3rZQiXcf5A
>>77868
I could see angry sex much more then depressed sex.

>>77867
What is she pissed off at?
>> Anonymous
>>77860
Well, if she's actually getting help for her anger issues then she might get better and eventually have a healthier sex life with you... It's possible that she's bottling up a lot of stuff and she's using sex as a way of passive-aggressively showing her anger. It's difficult for me to tell over the Internet (clearly), so don't take what I'm saying as the absolute truth, but...

tl;dr = try to get her to open up to you. If it doesn't work then you might want to consider letting her go or something, as she might carry this sort of behavior over into other aspects of your life together.
>> Anonymous
>>77872

Small, trivial things, her Mom calling too often, our cat meowing too loudly, the scent lingering around the kitchen after a big meal, she'd get overly frustrated/agitated over things like that, things that other people would just mutter "God dammit." to.
>> Anonymous
>>77874

I have been trying alot, and yes her mood has greatly improved since she's been on the anti-d's, but I suppose I'll ride it out for another month, try to get to the bottom of things, and if nothing changes I'll talk to her and tell her I'm out.
>> Anonymous
this happened to me, and a month later she broke up with me
>> Anonymous
>>77883

Nah, she'd never leave me. She way she grabs onto me, cries to me, she's way open with me. Plus, we've been together for a long time, she'd tell me right-out if she planned on leaving.
>> Anonymous
>>77885
dude, you have no idea how deceitful women can be.

srsly
>> Anonymous
>>77885

Girls are the devil. They'll tell you they love you one day, then fuck your best friend the next. All because you pissed her off with something you said.
>> Anonymous
I had an erection like 18 hours a day the first couple weeks after I went off antidepressants
>> Anonymous
Get yourself a toy, and stfu. Sex shouldn't even be half of a reason to be with someone. Seriously guys. wtf.
>> play !3rZQiXcf5A
>>77905
Blasphemy!
This is 4chan, and on 4chan we manly men know that wimmenz are only good for sexing!
>> Anonymous
>>77902
>> Girls are the devil. They'll tell you they love you one day, then smash your car windshield in next. All because you pissed her off with something you said.

Fixed.
>> Anonymous
>>77908
Even an oldfag can be serious once in a while.
>> Anonymous
>>77909

I'd prefer your smashed windshield then to the smashed heart that I got. Bawwwwww! Lol, I laugh now but the shit still hurts.
>> Anonymous
Most likely she has a hidden Opiate addiction. This is the cause of her loss of sex drive. I suggest spying on her, once you have the evidence confront her with it and say "I want in."
>> Anonymous
>>77885
I know how it feels man, I'm in the same boat right now. She's in the "I just don't feel the same anymore" mood now that some nerdy asshole I know at school told her how sad he was that he never asked her out over 9000 years ago so now she feels guilty for being with me or some shit.
Basically, it can and probably get worse with her getting angry over the littlest things or just really depressed at the drop of a hat.
>> Anonymous
>>78644
Beat that nerd up, he probably came from /b/
>> Anonymous
Communicate.

Also, if she doesn't see it as a problem there is no solution. Nothing can be resolved if she doesn't also seek resolution.
>> Anonymous
>>77885
Haha. My last girlfriend said this:
"I care about you so much, I'd never let anyone or anything come between us" all crying and hugging me 'n shit. Within an hour she dumped me. I wtf'd.
>> Anonymous
>>77905
Why get in a relationship with someone you can't fuck who you haven't been married to for years?

Fact is that she is easily replaceable with someone who OP can fuck and doesn't have as much problems. This is what most people don't realize. Life is too short to wait for her to feel like she wants to have sex again, and she KNOWS that someone else would've broken up with her now, and that he could get it somewhere else.

OP, ride it out another month, then dump her. Be in it for you, man. Chances are she's going to break up with you to finish the combo.
>> Anonymous
>>78688
Very true, if she won't do any work and expects you to shoulder all the responsibility to change/adapt/whatever then it's just not worth it anymore.

>>78707
Seconded
>> Anonymous
>>77883
>>77885
>>78690

oh yeah, it's always like that! don't count at the tears and hugging stuff
>> Anonymous
>>78707

sex is almost always a very good indicator of a healthy relationship. are you getting regular sex? is it fun and spontaneous and epic? GOOD SIGNS

are you not having any sex? or has it become infrequent? or is it just routine and boring and planned? BAD SIGNS

while not foolproof (in the first case she could be getting huge black dicks when you're not around and she's a total cockwhore), most of the time sexual intimacy is an indicator of the state of the relationship you're in.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>77908
and cooking

pic related
>> Guil
>>78870
Under that it needs to be fixed, theres a missing part:
"and then I went to jail"

also motivational posters are for underage b&, especially ones with watermarks from different websites
>> Anonymous
>>78875
i meet my new boyfriend bubba in jail
>> Anonymous
>>77834
Man I went through the same shit with my bf ( together 5 years now) this has also happened to a number of my friends who are in long term relationships. It's just a hump she'll get over it. If you haven't been together for like 2 years though I would be worried

If all else fails go to the sex shop and get something fun to play with :P nothing wrong with a little extra spice.
>> Anonymous
>>77834
Welcome to women.
>> Anonymous
do something really personal that shows you really care and are there for her. not to get sex back but to show that you wanna help her through whats shes going through... and then sex :D
>> Women in general The Man among Men.
The best tip I can give up to all of you. (And OP in perticular)

Is to be honest with her, and tell her that you want her to be honest to you in return.

And be clear with her that you want both of you to have open minds regarding your relationship, and what happens in it.

(Not the all-American way of thinking "open minded", where you go off and bang 50 girls/boys in one week)

I mean the open mind where you solve problems together, instead of directing all the thoughts down into yourself.

It really helps both of you if you can get a 2nd opinion on a problem or a brooding thought from your partner in life.
>> Anonymous
http://www.myspace.com/pottysniffer
FOR FREE NOODS
>> Anonymous
moar ryuk
>> Anonymous
>>79115
Clever job Mr. Troll, but THIS IS 4CHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>> Anonymous
>>77867

"Irritable and pissy" is often a better indication of depression than "sad all the time." It's just a different manifestation. The meds help with both.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
TROLL
>> Anonymous
Tough love: if you aren't getting what you want, get out.

Break up with her. Other fish, etc.

I was apprehensive about breaking up with my first girlfriend over sex, but it just wasn't happening, and it was a real strain on the relationship..she was a christfag and just wouldn't put out.

I HAD to get out of there, because I was miserable not being able to go that last mile.

Date as many girls as you can. Each new experience will teach you something useful about yourself.
>> Anonymous
has anyone been in a long-term relationship WITHOUT this happening? and is the sex always going to end up boring and routine?

worries me fellas
>> Anonymous
Piss in her breakfast.
>> Anonymous
>>81225

Yes.

Though I have to admit, there were times (for say 3 months at a time) when sex just was not happening.