File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Don't know where else to put this.

So on Thanksgiving, I got drunk and very distraught and cried and screamed and told my parents that I was going to commit suicide. I've told them that I've thought about it before, so they know its something that I have going on. Well, the next day, my mom comes to me and tells me that I need to stop being suicidal. Just like that.

That's not possible. I've tried again and again to tell her that problems like that can't just be fixed like that. I can't just stop having anxiety. I can't just stop being obsessive and compulsive. But she constantly tells me its something that I just need to stop.

I've been on many medications since I was 7, and in and out of therapy since I was 5. Therapy with and without my parents. My dad is fine, and he works with me on it, because he's had the same problems I have. I got them from him, and so did my brother. So he'll work with me, but my mom seems to think its just something I can fix overnight.

What can I do to get her to understand that I'm going to need a lot of time and understanding and help before I can fix these problems?!
>> Anonymous
Oh, also, I've stopped drinking as of Thursday. For more than 1 reason. And its not like I'm doing nothing to help myself. I'm going to therapy every week, I'm going to Overeaters Anonymous twice a week, and I take my medications every day.
>> Anonymous
>>481283
How old are you OP?
>> Anonymous
I'm 21. And don't say that I need to move out, because I've tried. I'm a full-time student and I work part-time at a shit job. So I have no money. I'm going to school for nursing right now, so when I'm done and have a job, I'll have no problem getting out, but its going to take a while.
>> Anonymous
>>481283
You don't need to get her to understand. You sound like you want everyone to know you have a "disability" and want to be coddled for it.

My family was fucking oblivious about me being fucking miserable. I cried myself to sleep every night and fantasized about killing myself without them knowing. You're right problems like this don't just fix themselves overnight. It takes a long progress with a lot of effort. I suggest you go get a job, if you don't have one, and make sure to give effort to get to know your co-workers. Also, try to spend less time at home, go out with friends and or go to college.
>> Anonymous
roleplay you emo bastard


pretend you're a robot with a button that erases all of your previous memories

1.) push the button
2.) start living
3.) ????????
4.) profit

voila, you're now the new robot deluxe straight outta walmart with the coolest fucking gadgets in town

suicide is probably the way i'll go out, but jesus not for emo purposes and definitely not as young as i assume you are
>> Anonymous
>>481337

I don't want to be coddled or pitied. I just want her to know that by her making these requests to just fix it, it tends to make things worse.

And if you read my post, I have a job, and go to school.
>> Anonymous
>>481315
Break up your issues so you don't have to take on everything at once. Throw yourself into study. Knock out that A&P. When you are on top of your game, then start looking at things in smaller parts. OK, so therapy with dad and brother seem effective. Mom will not go. OK. Learn that you can't fix or decide for other people what they have to do for themselves. Focus on yourself, and your way of healing.

Don't let yourself be alone too much. Check in with people.

You could try to confront your mom on the issue if you haven't, but if you are not up to it, don't. like I said, if she is going to hold you back, don't push the issue into somewhere you can't handle right now. Just make yourself happy.
>> Anonymous
Just like tinnitus you have to learn to mask it and ignore it, or in other words cope with it and make your condition your bitch instead of the other way around.

Sometimes it can be incredibly hard, i know that, but think of it this way, suicide is the easy way out of trouble. It takes real character to overcome issues, grit it and bear it and soldier on. And for that youll be the better man. I doubt anyone faced with issues thinks they can pull it off in the beginning but take one day at a time.

As for your mother, tell her to ask your father for an explanation, im sure hell set her straight.
>> Anonymous
>>481337You sound like you want everyone to know you have a "disability" and want to be coddled for it.

The ones who don't bottle it up and end up doing something rash. This is a good thing.

>>481346pretend you're a robot with a button that erases all of your previous memories

Your solution is a huge coping mechanism. The worst thing possible to do.

>>481353Just like tinnitus you have to learn to mask it and ignore it

No.

>>481353cope with it and make your condition your bitch instead of the other way around

Yes.
>> Anonymous
>>481352
>>481353

Both are good suggestions, and I'll definitely think about putting those into action.

If it weren't for my dad being so incredibly supportive, I think I would have done it a long time ago. But he seems to catch me whenever I'm falling, however lame that sounds.

I know its not easy, and I'm not looking for an easy way out. I admit, I do want it to be easy sometimes. Who doesn't want an easy life? And I don't want to sound too emo or self-pitying, but it seems when one thing goes wrong, everything else does too.

But I really appreciate everybody's help. Thanks.
>> Anonymous
>>481360

So in one post coping is bad, in another coping is good?

Going cold turkey on your mind is definitely the best way to change anything about yourself. To have the idea that it takes a "long and rough journey" is only a setback on your way to a happy life.

Then you die.
>> Anonymous
Oh, and another hurdle is that I have no motivation or will-power. I can talk myself out of doing things very easily. Some people might just call this laziness, but whatever. That is the issue I'm working on the most right now because without that, I can't do anything.
>> Anonymous
>>481360
>>481353make your condition your bitch instead of the other way around

Meant to drop the "coping". Coping, and doing what you wrote in the quoted text is opposite. Coping is bad. Ignoring is bad. Compartmentalizing is bad. If you don't deal with your issues, they will be right there waiting for you when you least are up to taking them on. Anywho, OP seems to be in a better place, and so am I.
fixed. Ball sucking, do i; disregard plox..
>> Anonymous
You can't change your parents. Don't even try, it'll just cause you shitloads of pain.
>> Anonymous
>>481398

Its hard to not want to change her when I have to live with her every day and she seems to hate me these days.
>> Anonymous
>>482384
THANK YOU SO MUCH! you pretty much summed up exactly what I am feeling but I could not put it as eloquently as you.

After years of working one on one with legit emotionally disabled childre/teens, it makes me sick to see so many people on 4 chan whine about being suicidal and depressed and needing medicine. You people conform to the sickness and take on its symptoms and literaly make it occur. try working with someone who tried killing themselves when they were 6 years old. or people who cry and lock themselves in their room and try to kill themselves because they explode when the weather is too cold. Fuck, try deaing with someone who will just break down and lay motionless on the floor and start to hyperventilate fbecause the temperature in the room lead to them panicking.

THAT'S real disability...not whining and crying because you feel as if though you are not normal. people with real issues do not ask themselves "oh man am i depressed?" What they feel is all they know and that is what makes it different then what you fucking emo queers expereince.
>> Anonymous
>>482376
Well, you know absolutely nothing about me. You don't know my medical history. You just come in here and read my post and for some reason feel the need to make me feel like shit. Well, fuck you. I don't need people like you who tell me that there's nothing wrong with me and I'm just a self-pitying idiot. People like you are the reason people DO kill themselves.
>> Anonymous
>>482384
Great post, brah.
>> Anonymous
>>482400

Ok, I know I don't have the most devastating disability in the world. I never said that I couldn't do anything. I just came on here to ask for some help. I know there are others out there that have it worse than I do. A lot worse, and I count myself lucky that I'm in a position where I am able to get help and take advantage of things that are offered to me. I just came here to get some advice from other people. So please stop lecturing me about how I don't have it as bad as some people. I know I don't, and never claimed to be the worst case ever.
>> Anonymous
ITT attention whore


>>481283
>> Anonymous
>>482406
>>482415
then please explain what it could be that has caused you all of these problem? Sexual abuse in your family? Abusive parents? Were you an orphan? Did your foster parents abuse you? Do you have sexual psychosis? Do you have personality disorders? Do you conive, plot, deciet and manpiulate in order to compensate for your lack of emotions? Do you do things and have no clue why you do them?

or are you just another socially inept person who has trouble understand their feelings? Maybe you were diagnosed with some depression or anxiety or add as a child? these are things that be be controled and should have been controled by this point in your life.

wake up buddy, your 21 and are an adult. this is acceptable and understandable for someone younger. but what are you going to do when you are out and on your own and are working? Do you think you have the emotional maturity to handle the medical field?

your right, i shouldnt have insulted you but you need to realize that you can control what it is that ails you. you are not in a unique position where ou are permnantley fucked up. work on it now and control it quickly because I'd hate to see what happens when you're hours are being cut at work, you have a case of negligence being examined by the board of directors, your rent is due and you're interest rate for your credit cards are soaring through the roof. all the while you're trying to pay bills, socialize, and handle all the other drama life has to offer.
>> Anonymous
>>482438
Depression and other disabilities aren't always caused by traumatic events like the ones you listed. My brain was just a little fucked up when I was born, and there's nothing they can do to permanently fix it. And the conditions that you say can be controlled? No, they can't. They can be monitored and maybe manipulated a bit, but they cannot be completely controlled. Trust me, I've been on about every medication they've created for these conditions.

If you look at me, you can tell there's something not right. I twitch all the time, pick at my face and scalp and ears until they bleed sometimes. I'm obese because I compulsively eat to comfort myself because if I'm not feeling well, at least I can have some enjoyment in eating food. And I am working on it. Like I said, I'm going to therapy, I'm taking Prozac and Welbutrin, and I've started Overeaters Anonymous.

And I know that I wouldn't be able to make it in the real world the way I am now. That's why, while I may complain sometimes, I'm very grateful that my parents are allowing me to stay at home while I work through this. As for the medical field, for some reason, I'm completely able to separate my personal feelings from work. Always have been able to. So I don't see that being a problem.

And I am trying my hardest to work on it. I know I can fix it, I just keep hitting bumps and get discouraged easily. But...I AM working on it.
>> Anonymous
>>482510
> I'm obese

G2B /fit/

O shi-
>> Anonymous
>>482510

wow, you just did exactly what

>>482384
said.