File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
so, /fit/, my roomie put some ridiculously dirty aquarium water in my coffee.

am i going to die?
>> Anonymous
throw up, drink a lot afterwards, seek medical advice
>> Anonymous
you'll be fine
>> Anonymous
>>103126
well, he did it yesterday afternoon, so i think it may be a bit late for throwing up

i thought it was just really crappy coffee :<
>> Anonymous
Maybe. Enjoy digesting fish feces and microscopic bacteria.

It's go time now. Pee in his shampoo, take a shit and scrub his toothbrush in the bowl, sneeze on his food, etc.
>> Anonymous
>>103132
hahaha <3 anon
>> Anonymous
oh man i love this game.

when my brother was in uni he fucking hated the roomate he was stuck with in first year in halls, he was a loud, obnoxious motherfucker who'd steal my bro's food but unleash hell if his was so much as touched, never paid rent, always whined etc etc, so my bro took his tub of spreadable butter, scooped out all the butter and took a shit in the tub, then heated the butter a little and poured it over the shit, till it was completely concealed, put the lid on the tub and put it in the fridge.

he used that butter on his toast every morning for about 3 weeks before he noticed the turd, at which point he lost the plot, trashed his room in halls which meant he got kicked out of the uni, and my brother never heard from him again.
>> sage
>>103158


That is a godly story. Never piss of roommates, and they might now hurt you.
>> Anonymous
i'm planning on a combo of laxatives in his food and gelatin in the toilet bowl, but i've never been good at pranks
>> Anonymous
>>103158
i just pissed myself laughing at this
>> Anonymous
pee in his butt the next time you're having delicious college buddy sex
>> Anonymous
>>103162
you saged wrong

also, here's my personal story... my roommate is a douche... he claims superiority to me ALL the fucking time... (and threatens me with a knife... but he won't actually do anything because he knows we'll both come out of it fucked up and one of us will probably be dead)... anyway, one day he pissed me off especially much, so I went into his car in the middle of the night and set his steering wheel so that he'd come out of the garage and run his tail end into the neighbors' house... I lol'd hard
>> Anonymous
>>103162
My roommate pissed in a bottle of whiskey that these douchebags left laying around in our house. (They were a guest of another roommmate).


Late when the pisshappy roommate made me mad, I pissed in his shampoo.
>> Anonymous
>>103833
good choice
>> Roommate pissed you off? Anonymous
Pull out the roommate's shampoo. masterbate in it, shake it some. Repeat as needed. Works really well if he's using the white kind.

If he ever comments about his shampoo making his hair especially shiny, or the bottle lasting longer than usual.. it's all worth it.

Toothpaste is also a fun little thing. But I'm sure we all know what to do with that.
>> Anonymous
My room-mate fucking annoyed me with his bitchy noisy girlfriend, so i took all his condoms and started to pierce them with a very small needle. Three months after i started to do so, i saw him really worry and he told me his girlfriend was pregnant. O lil'd hard. I lol'd even harder when she had the abortion.
>> Anonymous
OP here, i died. thanks.
>> Anonymous
>>104388
Wow, youre cool.

No really, thats a class A act.

Keep up the good work.
>> Anonymous
>>104388
Hey man, it's all good.
>> Tyler Durden
>>104388
Last year, this guy stole 3 of my jimmys. He pissed me off even more, so I did the same thing. Next time I'll have the ultra-small needle.
>> Anonymous
>>104388

I lol'ed