File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
hey /fit/

mental health question.

what is the best way to get a self esteem and ego boost? how do i feel good about myself? im already starting the process by reading venutos book, lost 23 pounds already, and am on my way to feeling better about myself physically. but what im asking is more of an easy shortcut to boost self esteem. when i was younger (late middle school to early high school) i used to go into chat rooms, and chat with chicks (prolly dudes posing as chicks, but whatever) to help boost my confidence. i got pretty good at it, getting girls to send me nudes, meeting and then fucking them in person, blah blah. it was a MASSIVE esteem boost, and i felt like a player. then in real life in school and shit, chicks would pickup on my self esteem and be all over me. but since then i have been very depressed, and have little to no self esteem/confidence. are there any other tricks like my old one to help boost confidence and self esteem?

tl;dr how does /fit/ boost self esteem?

i wish pic was related
>> Anonymous
I look at myself in the mirror until I find myself attractive and think about how attractive I am.

also, be more optimistic.
>> Anonymous
>>223620
im asking HOW though? and im 265 right now at 6'4, so looking in the mirror isnt exatly helping now. although i was 287, it is a barely noticable difference.
>> Anonymous
ALCOLOL!
>> Anonymous
>>223625
no matter how much i drink i dont get more confidence, only more courage. there is a difference
>> Anonymous
>>223624
how? you just do...

okay, what makes you special? what makes you feel good about yourself? think hard.
>> Anonymous
>>223624
also, that is a HUGE change (regarding your weight). when you lose weight like that, don't brush it off like its nothing - it will make your self-esteem go down.
>> Anonymous
Stop looking for validation in others. You and what you think are all that matters.
>> Anonymous
>>223616
I feel your pain.
I've gotten WAY better.
The best way?
Throw yourself out there. Put yourself into social situations and be more talkative.
The first few times you might look like a jackass or a fool, but you keep doing it and you get used to it.
Just force yourself to talk more.
Listen to some peoples conversations maybe, if it's something you know about, chime in.
Force yourself to if you're shy.
Worse comes to worse and they just look at you stupid and stop responding.
Then you leave and never see them again, so what?
Do that and you'll slowly get better at being able to talk with people, ease your way into conversations, etc.
That in turn will boost your self confidence to HUGE levels.
>> Anonymous
>>223636
pretty good advice, thanks.

im in a fraternity, and live in a frat house with 56 other dudes. our parties are massive, and usually the same chicks come over and over and over. its hard to meet new chicks this way, but not impossible. i have a job for now, but summer makes it very hard to do anything. most kids are out of town, phoenix, where i am from, is super boring and there is nothing to do. i just wish there was some sort of shortcut to get self esteem, because those chat rooms i went to when i was younger really seemed to be a good shortcut
>> Anonymous
>>223647
The thing that fat guys seem to have a problem with (me included) is that losing weight or whatever, they tend to think of it as good, but not a HUGE accomplishment.
Start thinking higher of yourself.
Think of your achievements as bigger and better all the time, the better you fell about what you accomplish, the more it will show and improve your personality.
In social situations, force yourself to NOT be shy.
As soon as you go shy, you fuck yourself.
>> Anonymous
The best way is to probably stop being a faggot and believe that you're aren't a worthless piece of shit. There is no magic program to make you more confident in yourself. You have to man the fuck up and just go for it.
>> Anonymous
>>223647
Why do you measure your self worth by how well you interact with others?

Also,
>>223636
is correct.

Every single situation you avoid because it could make you uncomfortable, is you subconsiously telling yourself you are a big, fat, sack of failure and fat. Face those situations head on. Fuck, activly seek out those situations.Worst that could happen is that some jock with validation issues will call you fat. Will big fucking whoop.

This shit doesn't happen over night, it happens in small steps. Acknowledge those steps.
>> Anonymous
>>223666
because my self esteem is low?

There is nothing that I am super good at, nothing that makes me special. Im overweight, average looks, average style in fashion, average in sports, average in video games, have an average family, im not super talkative, there is just nothing I feel that I can cling on to about myself that I love about myself that i can use to boost my self esteem
>> Anonymous
try to lose some weight jesus christ.

Have a couple beers. Fuck some hookers.
>> Anonymous
>>223675
>Im overweight, average looks, average style in fashion, average in sports, average in video games, have an average family, im not super talkative
5 out of those 7 things can be changed if you just put the effort into it.
Really.
You're never going to wake up one day and have it all, be good and so forth.
You get out as much as you put in.
I can tell you this first hand.
Work for it, if you really want it, then you'll get it.
>> Anonymous
>>223616
I agree with most on this thread, just get out there and go for it, don't waste too much time thinking about it and getting down on yourself. But yeah, again most important is that you actively seek out what you want to achieve. Also there are actually chat rooms with chicks who'll send you pics and fuck you? wtf! i thought they were all overrun with /b/tards. and i assume since you actually fucked them they were actually chicks..
>> Anonymous
>>223687
what he says. Realise you have the power and ability to change your life. Accept that which you cannot change (family and looks) then go out and run a few klicks every day while not eating cake.
>> Anonymous
>>223701
yeah this was like 3-4 years ago. but yeah, Buddypic.com (myspace before myspace was popular) is fucking nuts when it comes to scoring chicks. i fucked 3-4 from that website, and got a girlfriend for 2 years from that website. kinda faggoty, but yeah, it was fun. i also lurked on aol chat rooms before all the bots and viruses took over
>> Anonymous
>>223687
all i was trying to say is that there isnt much super great about me, so its understandable that i have a low self esteem and am finding a hard time to snap out of it
>> Anonymous
>>223706

You're just a sad sack of tears. I can't believe I was ever like you.
>> Anonymous
one word answer: Achievement.

You've looked at your life and realized it is mostly fail. Now you want to replace it with win.
Does it really matter what kind of win, as long as it's win?

Start with cleaning your living space. The space you live in says a lot about your state of mind. Ever notice the more depressed you are, the shittier your home gets? Look around your newly cleaned space. A winner lives here.

10 Set exercise goals low enough that you can't fail but high enough that you feel like you got something done.
20 Get it done.
30 Raise goals.
40 GOTO 10.

Learn to cook real food. Even just one meal! Try a new recipe every week for the first month, and then a new recipe every month after that. Soon you'll have enough so that you'll never be bored and friends will be impressed that you can cook. I've never failed to lay a girl that I cooked for.

Now your space is clean, your body is stronger, and you're eating right. You've got momentum going here, so use it. Make a list of all the things in your life that bug you, even a little bit. Start dealing with them. Especially all those little ones that aren't worth your time but have been there forever.

You're probably a guy. This is what guys do. They see a problem and they fix it. Fix yourself. Fill your life with win.
>> Anonymous
>>225214
shit, i meant

40 GOTO 20.

:P
>> Anonymous
Zoloft.
>> Anonymous
Girls are interested in boring unattractive guys who are only interested in sex.

tl;dr become an hero.
>> Anonymous
>>225327
girls are also interested in interesting attractive guys who are interested in sex
>> Anonymous
>>225214

Good advice on /fit.

A modern day miracle.

I concur with this gentleman's words. I deal with everything in my life the same way: set a realistic goal and achieve it. Key word achieve.

Thank you, wise anon.
>> Anonymous
>>225214
>>225339
I third this advice
>> Anonymous
Stop caring what people think and get off the internet and go talk to some real people.

Do you care what I think? You shouldn't, chances are I don't even live on the same continent as you.
>> Rumple4Skin !!y4FISU6NCCD
>>225327
>>225331

So basically, they are interested in guys who have the wrong interest in mind, thereby, giving them the wrong interest too.

Gotta love it.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Take drugs until you feel better about yourself
>> Anonymous
>>225339
>>225343
Aw shucks, t'wern't nothin'.

I don't think the importance of a clean home can be overstated. There's a difference between having your shit in one place and having your shit *together*.

Especially those little things. Those nearly subliminal spider-sense "momma would have made me clean that up" kinda things. You clean those up and that horrid little guilty voice has got nothing to feed on. It's like... killing all those resource-sucking threads in Windows Program Manager so that you have more power to run ..uh.. Diablo 3. Only it's in your head, and now you have more brain power to think about how to solve the othet stuff, or learn some new skill, or just psyche yourself for your next set of squats.

There's a lot of people in the world that will try to stop you from getting what you want. Don't be one of them.
>> Anonymous
Do what I do when you I'm having a tough time with the girls. go into a shopping center and go into shops and the shop girls have to be nice to you. have a chat. its good for the ego.
>> Anonymous
even though i am not op i feel pretty much how he feels

this thread has made me feel so much better about myself

i think alot of people reading this thread would thank you for the advice

and i myself thank you anons
>> Anonymous
>>225975
OP here, glad my thread survived from last night. lots of good advice here, im excited to try it out. im actually a very good cook so the new recipie thing sounds like a good, fun, productive idea. thanks everyone!
>> Anonymous
>>223616
maybe you need to be medicated
>> Anonymous
>>223616

as simple as take a walk and see how the world is full of darwinian errors
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
Confidence makes everything better.

You know what? Fuck what other people think of you. Pull on a t-shirt and some jeans, boots/sneakers, and as long as you look reasonably neat, tidy (tuck in your shirt, you silly dick, I don't care if it's a t-shirt), what problem do you have? So what if you're not in fashion. I haven't been in fashion since I was 14, and I still look decent. Once you've put on your very complex outfit, walk out the door and put your chin up, shoulders back, chest out and walk as though you're going to walk through anything that gets in your way, furniture or person. Bump into people if they don't move. Look surprised that they're there.

Smile. Make jokes. If it falls flat, use it as a learning experience. Laugh. Don't take things too seriously.
>> Anonymous
If I make eye contact with someone then I smile and stare them down. It's fucking hard to do but 3/4 of the time the girl will start a conversation with me, usually something like "where do we know each other from?". If I do it to a guy and he blinks first, I feel totally badass.

(PS: best answer to that question is "my bed, an hour from now.")
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
More belts and breasts.
>> Anonymous
New boy here:

This might seem a bit pompous and narcissistic, but I'm not going to lie; I'm the best dressed motherfucker in our school and easily rank in the top 5 best looking guys in my school. I have girls secretly swoon over me and my friends' gfs tell them to tell me I'm hot.

BU-BU-BU-BUT!! I rarely leave my house on the weekends opting for FIFA06 and Internet. And if I do happen to leave the house finding my self Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school When a couple of guys said "we’re up in no good" Started making trouble in my neighbourhood I got in one little fight and my mom got scared And said "you’re moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air" I begged and pleaded with her the other day But she packed my suitcase and sent me on my way She gave me a kissin’ and she gave me my ticket I put my walkman on and said I might as well kick it First class, yo this is bad, Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass Is this what the people of bel-air livin’ like, Hmm this might be alright! I whistled for a cab and when it came near the License plate said "fresh" and had a dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air I pulled up to a house about seven or eight And I yelled to the cabby "yo, home smell you later" Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air
>> Anonymous
>>223675
just replace overweight with underweight and you're me/I'm you

and this friend I'm talking to on aim is just making me significantly depressed...I'm about to go for a run.
>> Anonymous
>>223616
were you fat when you scored with all those bitches? or were they just subpar?