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Anonymous
S'up /fit/. My girlfriend's off in another country until christmas and I wanna surprise her by being noticably buff when she gets back.

I'm 5'4", 104 pounds, less than 5% body fat. What should I do to beef up a bit over the next two and a half months?

Hard Mode: I'm in the middle of fucking nowhere. No gym within about thirty miles, so just exercises I can do without much equipment.

Nightmare Mode: And I have type 1 diabetes.
>> sage
rip your own head off.
>> Anonymous
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.

Enjoy your break up.
>> sage
ANYTHING
>> Anonymous
>>386603
You don't know they'll break up.

>>386599
Do body weight exercises, I guess?
>> Anonymous
5'4'', really? Chicks like abs & pecs, GET TO WORK!

widespread pushups
bench
ab ripper x from p90x !
>> Anonymous
>>386629

I was mostly looking for suggestions. I don't know shit about getting fit. I'm presently doing sets of twenty pushups/situps/hindu squats, two or three times one day, then a day off, and then repating. I also own a couple of dogs, so I spend about an hour a day out walking them.

Anything else I should be working on?
>> Anonymous
You do not have less than 5% body fat. No idea where you got this idea from.

Eat a lot, lift, gain 40 pounds, and Google. You are insanely skinny.

And yes, she's being fucked by another man.

PS: You will not be buff by the time she gets back. You have no weights, you know little about lifting, and you have diabetes.
>> Anonymous
>>386640
www.stronglifts.com
/thread
>> Anonymous
>>386640
Well the walking's gotta stop, that won't help any bulking efforts. I suggest slaughtering the dogs and eating their meat (excellent protein source, you can freeze what you can't eat straight away).

If one of the dogs is big, you could drape it over your shoulders and do SQUATZ
>> Butts !!UT84wajcyM1
>>386640
Bench press dogs
>> Anonymous
>>386646

fuck that shit, curl the dags. it's for a girl, so remember "curls for girls". he's got two, so once they're slaughtered he can do alternating left and right arm curls. might have to trim the meat off one of them to even out the weight.
>> Anonymous
>104 pounds
>5% body fat
oh dear...

I hate to tell you this, but your goals are pretty far from attainable unless you want to DO THE IMPOSSIBLE BREAK THE UNBREAKABLE ROW ROW FIGHT DA POWA!
>> OP
Okay. So my chances of getting 'buff' are pretty slim. How're my chances for 'noticeably improved muscle definition'?
>> Anonymous
>>386660
5% bf is more muscle definition than most people have at any point in their lives. If you start eating a lot more and doing your exercises with more weight (or at least switching to one-arm/one-legged versions for a start), you'll gain mass. Not as much or as fast as you might like, but it never is.
>> Anonymous
>>386653

I love you
>> OP is delusional Anonymous
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for reference. this guy is 7%

if you need to worry about 'definition' at 5%......

god, to realize you are nothing but a skinny-fat piece of shit, and to top it off, only 5'4"....she's definately fucking a REAL MAN in another country

enjoy your fail
>> Anonymous
why dont you try eating meat instead of grass and twigs
>> OP
>>386669

I've been a skinny geeky bastard for pretty much all my life. I may have definition but I don't have much in the way of actual muscle. Been doing the pushups/situps/squats thing three weeks or so now, and while I don't look much better, I sure has hell *feel* fitter.

I guess I'll just keep at my current exercise plan, if such it can be called, and switch to one-hand pushups as soon as I work out how to not fall over.

Should I be working up to more of each per set too?
>> Anonymous
>>386684
> I've been a skinny geeky bastard for pretty much all my life. I may have definition but I don't have much in the way of actual muscle.
That's what I'm telling you.

> I guess I'll just keep at my current exercise plan, if such it can be called, and switch to one-hand pushups as soon as I work out how to not fall over.
Set your feet further apart and keep your body stiff as a board. Pushups are easier when you elevate your hands, so that's a way to work up.

> Should I be working up to more of each per set too?
No, increase the resistance, either with weights, single limb versions, or more difficult setups (such as elevated-foot pushups) to keep challenging yourself. Also decrease the number to 5-ish for strength, or maybe more like 10 for size. If you can do more than a couple reps past the target number, you need more weight.
>> OP
>>386683

Parents were hippies. Vegetarian until I was about twenty. Been making sure I get a decent amount of protein since, but I just don't seem to put on much weight.
>> OP
>>386694

Righto. I'll give that a shot. Thanks.
>> Anonymous
>>386706
Are you making sure to get lots of calories too?
>> Anonymous
>>386723
OP i hope ur diabetes will go away bro

best luck to u
>> Anonymous
I'm 6', 3% body fat, 143 lbs.

I've doubled the weight I train with, and I can hardly see any increase in size.

That's from one lean guy to another. Good luck to you.

Focus on crunches, get a good six-pack, it was easy to do and it's the fastest results.
>> CWheezy !!bJFrM5LONOF
>>386808
You can't figure out why you're not gaining size?
>> Anonymous
>>386803

I lol'd. Hard. Type 1 diabetes is child-onset. You're stuck w/ it for life, tool.
>> Anonymous
Check out simplefit.org. The only equipment you will need is a $15 pull up bar. You may not bulk up, but you will look and feel much better.

As far as diet, eat a small handful of raw walnuts and a bowl of oatmeal with a tablespoon of ground flaxseed and some berries for breakfast every day.
>> Anonymous
OP if you want MASS, powerlifting can give you fast results. In 3 weeks, people were commenting if I was going to the gym.

The key is to be exhausted by the 5th rep. Each rep is a clean jerk, swing if you have to. That is all. Enjoy your mass.

Oh, you'll still need a cardio program to lose the fat surrounding the muscles.
>> Anonymous
>>386808

Holy shit, guy... are you me?

I've got 3 or 4% BF too. Also 6' and 140-ish pounds.
I am already doing one-armers and pistols instead of SQUATZ. Not much gain though.
>> ? Anonymous
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I'm about 8 inches taller than you and 45 pounds more than you, with that being said, i'm just a little bit heavier than you are for our body proportion. We're both skinny fuckos though. Just do what some of these guys have already been saying, low-rep high weight exercises, you dont need to do any cardio at all and you should already look relatively cut.
>> Anonymous
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>> Anonymous
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.
Sorry to tell you but shes in another country being fucked by another man.