File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
Is it possible for me to get in shape by September?
I'm not saying like in outstanding decathlon shape (eventually hopefully), but forming a six pack, losing thunder thighs, getting rid of the puffer fish cheeks, so on?

If it is possible what are some fitness regimines to do other than Bench, Cleaning and Squats (I honestly have no money to join a gym, but I could run and do calisthenics at home or around my neighborhood)

I realize it takes time and dedication and I would like stop being a fat slob, loser who doesn't get the girls nor any attention.
>> Anonymous
YOU KNOW, IF YOU ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING INSTEAD OF POSTING ON /fit/ THEN THAT MIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPEN.
>> Anonymous
Sandbags, motherfucker.

First, focus on gaining some muscle. Muscle burns fat constantly throughout the day. For a weightlifting newbie you will mostly likely see some quick gains for the first month or two.

Then you focus on losing fat. Eat plenty of protein to hang onto the muscle (a shake or a protein bar a day will help) Eat about 500 calories below maintainence level each day and RUN.
>> Anonymous
>>166998
So definitely run. Would dumbell presses work well enough for weight lifting?
>> Anonymous
ugh your body is gross man, sorry dude

go to tnation, lurk there every day. honestly
>> Anonymous
>>167030
I know :(
so run, lift weights. What kind of diet? Is atkins any good?
>> Anonymous
>>167035

stay away from this board.
go
to
www.t-nation.com

lurk there forever.

lurk the forums, especially beginners and nutrition.

i have found this site has the most BS free information, as well as the most helpful members
>> Anonymous
>>167049
Thank you
>> Anonymous
hahahaaha

you're the kid who posted himself wearing those tight pants in /fa/
>> Anonymous
like the man said t nation is your friend. fyi thunder thighs are when you have muscular thighs sir.
>> Anonymous
you dont have thunder thighs, you have little girl legs
>> Anonymous
Depends on what you mean by "shape". You definitely won't have time to get much muscles (a kilo or two at best) so if you plan cutting the fat out too, I'd just suggest concentrating on dieting and getting the six pack out straight off the bat.

Also, listen to>>167049
/fit/ isn't exactly the british library when it comes to dieting information
>> Anonymous
>>167239

everyone on tnation is going ot tell this kid to bulk
>> Anonymous
>>167241
I've seen this while I've been lurking tonight. So is cardio the best way to burn the fat?
>> Anonymous
sure, spend 6 hours a day working out and youll get abs in a month
>> Anonymous
>>168328
What kind of working out? Just running and crunches?
>> Anonymous
>>167241
which is why he needs to lurk and not talk to people
>> Anonymous
>>167297

anaerobic activity like sprinting is the best way. It builds muscle and burns a lot of calories. Best implementation of sprinting is with a HIIT(high intensity interval training).

Google it.
>> Anonymous
>>168385
Thank you
>> Pikey
Yes, you can get in good shape by September.

Start with a plan and print/write it out. Here's a foundation for month 1:


CONDITIONING:

Start with some jogging every other morning. 1 mile. Walk when you need to rest, but start running again as soon as you can. Puking is allowed.

Pushups. Do as many in a row as you can, then work your way through twice that many. So lets say you can do 10 in a row on your first set. Work your way through 20 more, resting whenever you need to. Do it every day.

Crunches. Start with 20 then 10 then 5 every day. second week, move on to 30,20,10. Make them count by holding the last one.

Bootstrappers. Google them. learn to love the pain. Do 4 sets of 20 every fucking day, even on jogging days.

Those 4 exercises will keep you more than busy for a month. Then you can look into moving on to harder stuff once they start feeling easy.

continues...
>> Pikey
DIET:

From this point on, you no longer drink sodas, sugary fruit drinks, or alcohol, or coffee. You now only drink water and unsweetened tea.

From this point on, you no longer eat white bread, ever.

From this point on, you no longer eat any pork product or processed meat, ever.

Form this point on you no longer eat any other fat/sugar combo candy crap snacks at all.

From this point on, you avoid fatty add-ons like cheese and sour cream and mayo. Lean meat already has enough fat in it.

Food is now on there for one purpose, to feed you protein and good carbs as efficiently as possible. You do not care about how it tastes, if it has the nutrition you need, its fucking delicious.

-Buy cans of chicken breast, and frozen boneless/skinless chicken breasts, eat one a day somehow no matter what.

-Buy eggs, boil them, peel them, and put them in the fridge.

-Buy cottage cheese. Learn to like it with berries in it.

-Buy beans, learn how to cook and eat them every day.

-Buy bananas and toilet paper

-Buy oatmeal, one flavored instant, and one big tub of the boring unflavored. Mix them half and half every morning for breakfast with a boiled egg and a banana a multivitamin and a glass of milk. This is more important than any other meal. You fucking eat it and love it.

Eat 5 meals a day. Never get hungry, never get full. Get some carbs and protein a couple of hours before your workout, and take some more protein and carbs within 30 minutes after.


--

There it is, a first month plan. The first month will decide if you can make the rest. Because if you stick to it (for real) in month one, you'll feel like a fucking million dollars and will drop at least 2" on your waist.

Make a commitment for one month. Test your integrity.

GOOD LUCK, and keep us updated!
>> Pikey
PS: On conditioning exercises above, you can take weekends off.
>> Anonymous
God damn OP... God damn...
>> Anonymous
>>168434
I heard potato diet works if you are active? What's your take on it?
>> Anonymous
OP how old are you?
>> Pikey
>>168452

Sorry, I dont have any info on the potato diet.
>> Anonymous
>>168452

Put it this way, any diet that starts with "The", is bullshit.

High protein & good fats, low carbs, low sugar, no alcohol etc.. combined with exercise is the proper way to do it.

You have plenty time, if you put the effort in you can reach your goal.
>> Anonymous
>>168463
I just turned 18
>> Anonymous
>>168433
>>168434
this is very helpful, thank you so much
>> Anonymous
>>168482
Simple.

Eat potato everyday, it's good carb. (not fried though)
Try to stay away from fat (only use marg, 500gr a day should be enough)
Eat only boiled meat.
Eat 4 eggs at least, at breakfast, boiled.

Nevermind the sports, just do the pushups.
>> Anonymous
>>168715

dumbest shit i've ever heard
>> Anonymous
>>166988

By the way OP, it's not your shape that loses the girls attention. It's the socks.

Get the fuck away from those white socks, burn them all.

And on the top of it, never walk around with boxers and socks, it's the weakest look of all.
>> Anonymous
>>168717

No, it works.
By eating mashed potatoes every 8 meal (with 500 grams of marg ofcourse) your body works mushrooms.
Boiled eggs are essential.
>> Anonymous
>>168723
lol, k
I only wear those when I wear jeans, and I took off the jeans to show off my fat thighs that are as round as mega watermelons :(
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
http://rapidshare.com/files/121796184/Burn_The_Fat_Feed_The_Muscle_-_Tom_Venuto.rar

Read this book, for example:

The menu template for the low or moderate carbohydrate diet

Meal 1:
Lean Protein, Starchy carb (large serving)

Meal 2:
Lean Protein, Starchy carb (large serving)

Meal 3:
Lean Protein, Starchy carb (small serving or none), Fibrous carb (vegetable/salad)

Meal 4:
Lean Protein, Fibrous carb (vegetable/salad), essential fat

Meal 5
Lean Protein, Fibrous carb (vegetable/salad), essential fat

Meal 6
Lean Protein, Fibrous carb (vegetable/salad)
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>168755
You then just plug in the food you want from the list and voila! Invest in dumbbells if you can't afford a gym, by a bench if you can also. Save up towards one. Start off working out the entire body 3 times a week at 3 X 8-12, doing 1 exercise per muscle group.
>> Pikey
You can do it man! FLIP THE FUCKING SWITCH!
>> Anonymous
>>168759
>>168796
You guys have motivated me, thank you. I should try the cottage cheese technique. While earning up money to go to college this summer, I am working at a grocery market. Their deli has chicken, I believe, and of course it is terrible, but would taking off the skin make it good? I think I answered my question, probably not -__-. Also is it okay if I just have salads for lunch?
>> Anonymous
>>168748
you have little bitch thighs, they even cave in like an 8 year old school girl.

my thighs are fucking twice that size
>> Anonymous
>>168899
proportionately I am saying they're fat
>> Anonymous
crossfit.com
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>168825
No, it's not... it seems like a good idea - eating less = weight loss, but that's not true. You will go into metabolic state and only muscle will be lost, not fat... eating smaller meals frequently like I suggested (READ THE BOOK) speeds up your metabolism. Believe me dude, if you want to lose the weight, you need to do cardio, weightlifting, and follow a proper diet like I suggest, that is the safest and most effective method I've come across.

Eating only a salad for lunch is an awful idea, really. Starving yourself/not eating enough calories slows down your metabolism and makes it harder to lose fat.
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>168947
>You will go into metabolic state

should be

>You will go into catabolic state
>> Anonymous
>>168947
Ok. Just wondering. Because there are no healthy things that are premade at a grocery store X_X.
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>168983
>>168983
You should be planning your meals ahead of time anyways, if you're serious about losing the weight, bring food with you prepared, if you don't have time then get some protein powder and make a shake or think of another solution to your problem, really there are many. And although food in their natural state are better, if canned is all you can get it's better than nothing, just stick to the plan, really read that book though.
>> Anonymous
>>168992
ok, so a protein shake is an okay alternative?
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>169035
If you don't have time, then yes, but it's better for your body to actually digest real food, better for your metabolism. Main thing is if you're doing exercise (cardio and weighltifting) that you get that protein frequently), just read the book to get a better understanding. Shouldn't take you more than a day or two to read it and understand it.
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>169041

AND FUCKING LUV IT. SERIOUSLY, I MEAN YOU'LL LUV IT SO HARD IT HURTS YOUR GUY TOOL
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>169042
You're not going to troll me, and you're just proving to yourself (and everyone here) you have nothing better to do, and it's a bit pathewic. I will be ignoring you from here on out but I am just saying, for your sake, go do something more productive.
>> Anonymous
Holy knock knees batman. If you don't like that whole concave knees look, and if you'd like to not have a huge disadvantage in basically anything athletic involving your legs, see an orthopedic surgeon about that. I'm not gonna lie, they make you look like a giant fucking loser. Best look into that.
>> MaddoxMan !!pvgYyl5+noK
>>169045

Lol but who will tell everyone how to read this awesome book??! I mean, it's not like I'm opening myself up to mockery by posting the same crap over and over. And, I can only comprehend ideas that come out of this book. Basic nutrition just flies over my head if Tom Venuto didn't write it. Also, I really love Tommy Venuto. He's a pretty cool guy, eh gives me long cockzorz and doesn't afraid of anything.
>> Anonymous
>>169055
It's the stance I'm in. My knees don't usually do that sort of tuck.
>> Anonymous
>>168433

Not OP, but awesome post...

After that 1st month of beginner exercises, how do you feel about sandbag training?
>> Pikey
>>169465

Sandbag. I tried it. Its cheap, and works great for deadlifts and shrugs and walking up stairs. However, for squats, the bulky bag will push your head downward from behind and that ruins your form. Maybe a backpack would be better?
>> Sponge !!5qxfxHYSQxJ
maddox your stupid ass book sucks
>> Anonymous
@maddux

Shitty diet advice is shitty.

Yes avoid sodas and sugary drinks but there really isn't anything wrong with drinking coffee or a healthy juice drink every now and then like cranberry juice. Diuretics like coffee and cranberry juice are essential for good health.

And Bananas? Terrible advice. They're probably the worst possible fruit to eat. Try Apples and pears and things like that. Also, avoid starchy carbs like potatoes.
>> Pikey
>>169920

I think you meant @Pikey.

I disagree about bananas. They are great for breakfast and post workout. Other fruits are great too.

You're right about real juices like cranberry, but there are so many awful juices out there posing as healthy! Coffee is good in moderation, with no sugar or cream!

Thanks for pointing these out.
>> Anonymous
>>168434

10/10

One of, if not THE best post that I have ever read.
>> Anonymous
what is a good thing to eat after a workout that has has a good source of protein and carbs?
>> Anonymous
>>169933
seconded, saved for future use.
>> Anonymous
>>168434
This post has probably saved my life.
>> Anonymous
Lentils and cottage cheese. Eat that shit.
>> Anonymous
die
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
I shall follow your plan to a tee.
>> Anonymous
Holy fuck I just did 4 sets of 20 bootstrappers and now I feel fucking amazing.
>> Pikey
>>170094

People have to start somewhere. I've only offered my opinion on what will be helpful and not harmful for the first month out of the chair.

Why are you being a sarcastic cocksore? Read the OP and offer some real help or STFU.
>> Anonymous
>>170094

Shit man thats nothing, do 1 squat and you will feel like you just injected heroin into your brain.
>> Anonymous
>>170117
Dying-y?
>> Anonymous
>>168434
>>168434
Not OP but WHAT THE FUCK IS THE PROBLEM OF PURE NIGGER CUP OF COFFEE A DAY?
>> Anonymous
>>170130
Because niggers get everyone down.
>> Anonymous
>>170132
IT GIVES ME ENEREGY.
>> Anonymous
>>170107
Lol, you are right and sadly I am one of those people. I was not being sarcastic. x_x
>> Anonymous
>>170134
FUCK I MEAN ENERGY, SEE HOW FUCKING HARDCORE IT IS? IT ADDS ADDITIOINAL MOTHERFUCKING LETTERS TO YOUR WORDS.
>> Pikey
>>170130

I was corrected on that comment. As long as its not sweet/cream crap coffee and its black and in moderation (not "Im on the coffee diet") then coffee is fine.
>> Pikey
>>170138
Hey no problem, hard to tell with the Internets. Good Luck!