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Anonymous
Honestly, those pizza rolls are so processed they are practically pre-chewed. Why this fat fucker took as long as he did confuses me.
thedailyplate says that there are 230cal/11gfat/24gcarb/8gprotein per 18 rolls, so I guess it's not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. During my fat days I would get a honey bun from the vending machine at work that was 680 cal with 99gcarbs and tasted like shit.
That Smirnoff at the end was probably water. Did you see how it didn't hiss when opened, didn't bubble when tipped to drink, and basically moved like non-carbonated something? / A fat fuck and a liar. Like you, that breathing/wheezing while eating made me rage more than anything. David Spade used that line in 'Tommy Boy', told Chris Farley that he could hear him get fatter as he ate - this guy's noises is what I imagine that to be like.
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