File :-(, x, )
Martin Seargent !7chTDwPQh2
This is not a full posting of Melonfuck. That's been done. I won't link to it either. I just want to mention that if you can't come relatively quickly, this sucks ass.

Through recent personal experience (this morning, lol) the cantaloupe eventually starts producing some kind of acid or some shit that KILLS your penis. I'm sure it works better if you can get in the position depicted, but due to unfortunte circumstance, I couldn't, so I was humping the shit out of that melon for a little over half an hour. About twenty minutes in though, it starts burning a little.

So anyway, I just gave up after it started hurting too much. It fucking sucked too, because I was so pissed at the experience that I wouldn't even eat the cantaloupe. I would have, if I could have achieved my goal. But no, it started burning and scratching and shit.

So, in short, don't go fucking cantaloupe if you can't get off in about twenty minutes or so, because it burns and scratches, and when you pull out, it doesn't get any better, so you can't bring yourself to orgasm afterwards.

But I want to hear your experience. Because I know SOME of you went and fucked a cantaloupe.
>> Anonymous
>cantaloupe eventually starts producing some kind of acid or some shit

hmm, could it be CITRUS ACID
>> Martin Seargent !7chTDwPQh2
I don't think cantaloupe is a citrus fruit.
>> Anonymous
no, just you.
>> Anonymous
/r/ sauce
>> Martin Seargent !7chTDwPQh2
>>532179

I would have thought that everyone in /d/ would have it by now, but since the translation is so fucking awesome, I can't withhold it.

http://rapidshare.com/files/46654603/Semen_Sprinkler_J__Melonfuck_.zip
>> Martin Seargent !7chTDwPQh2
It's come to my attention that the link is NOT for the translated version. Sorry.

http://rapidshare.com/files/46893220/Semen_Sprinkler_J__English_.zip
>> Anonymous
This thread is stupid and useless.
>> Anonymous
>>532193

says you, melon-nonfucker.

breeder chomo.

mammosexual.
>> GurlJ....
You gotta remove the seeds first and warm it up in the microwave silly.

___________
I'm dissapointed in 4chan today :|
>> GurlJ....
Also, fill it up with marshmellow fluf afterwards.
>> Anonymous
>>532176
But while we're on the subject, do not attempt this with a grapefruit!!
>> GurlJ....
     File :-(, x)
AND WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM !
>> GurlJ....
Why not try a cactus filled with mashed up poison ivy leafs ?
>> Anonymous
If you're looking for a new fapping sensation, why not just apple pie?
>> Anonymous
>>532274
I dunno, that sounds like a lot of work.
>> Martin Seargent !7chTDwPQh2
>>532289

I would never defile apple pie that way. Maybe you don't see how you can clean out a cantaloupe when you're done, but you can. An apple pie? Forget about it. And I've tasted my semen. It's not good.
>> Anonymous
>>532294

Dude, we'll just tell your mother we ate it all.
>> Anonymous
>>532332
Too bad I'm eating your mother.
>> Anonymous
>>532336
Long as she keeps baking pies, it's all good.
>> Anonymous
>>532294

If your semen doesn't taste good, you should try to eat more fresh fruit, chicken, fish, mushrooms and limit your intake of things like strong tasting vegetables(broccoli, asparagus) and red meat. So, always be sure to eat a melon after you fuck it.
Also, thanks for the warning, OP. I'm going to fuck a Galia melon later today, I'll take your advice. By the way, what actually happens? If it's just a burning sensation, that could be a turn on for me.
>> Anonymous
the best melon for this is actually a honeydew.
>> Anonymous
I once made pizza pasta and fucked it. with olive oil. kind of fun.
>> Anonymous
.... wear a condom!!
>> Anonymous
>>532429
Ugh, why the fuck would anyone ever wear a condom? They're god's way of telling you he hates you.
>> Anonymous
>>532429
That whore melon picked up every kind of disease off the streets before you found her.
>> Anonymous
>>532341
Put lemon juice (or perhaps mustard) on your dick first. If the resulting sensation is a turn-on, then perhaps melon-fucking is for you!
>> Anonymous
>>532485

Neat idea, thanks.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>>532456
that dirt whore!
>> Anonymous
>>532450

No, that's what AIDS is.
>> SiggyPoo !GQUOsC9mgk
you might be allergic to melons like i am. look it up, its a real allergy related to ragweed allergy and hayfever.
>> Anonymous
This is a great thread.
>> Anonymous
>>532741
when you say related to ragweed do you mean "i'm alergic to ragweed and i'm alergic to melons so it must be related" or do you actually know that there is a connection?

i for one am allergic to every indigenous grass in the US (including ragweed) and half the world's green veggies, but don't have problem with melon fruits.
were it not for the beautiful wonders of modern allergenic medicine i would be a snot volcano from spring to fall.
>> SiggyPoo !GQUOsC9mgk
>>532759
http://allallergy.net/fapaidfind.cfm?cdeoc=995

allergens affect mucus membranes, such as inside of mouth and throat.
or urethra. -_-
>> Anonymous
It's amazing how /d/ just went fucking insane over this and never, ever, EVER stopped looking for a split second. Wow.
>> Anonymous
>>532767
i know that it is possible to be allergic to melons. i was asking how it is related to ragweed or if you were just pulling that out of your ass. that page does not mention ragweed at all.
>> SiggyPoo !GQUOsC9mgk
>>532774
HA woops WTF.
wrong one. i shoulda checked first.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/conditions/allergies/allergicconditions_hayfever.shtml

"Oral allergy syndrome

Some people with hay fever develop oral allergies to certain fruits, vegetables and nuts. This is also called the pollen-food allergy syndrome. Patients typically develop hay fever in early spring and then notice itching and swelling of their mouth and throat when they eat fresh fruit and vegetables.

People who are allergic to silver birch pollen develop oral allergies to apples, peaches, cherries, carrots, celery, hazelnuts, peanuts and walnuts. People allergic to grass pollen develop oral allergies to tomato, melon and watermelon. Mugwort pollen allergy cross-reacts with apple, celery and carrot. Ragweed pollen allergy cross-reacts with bananas, melon and honey. People do not react to cooked or canned foods and the reaction usually remains localised to the mouth and throat."
>> Anonymous
>>532782
holy shit, this is exactly what i have.

never knew the name of it. lol.

well, like i said i've never gotten a reaction from mellon though i don't like it much. then again i've never stuck my sinep in one. guess i'd better be careful if i ever do this and not do it with any of the fruits or veggies i do get reaction to.
>> Anonymous
Yeah, the thing that bugs me about MelonFuck, is that she fucked the melon then fucked the girl.. The acid from the fruit should burn like hell in blondies vagoo.
>> Mel !iKGMr61IHM!!VJX
>>532174twenty minutes

Jesus Christ. If I really wanted to fuck a cantaloupe that bad, I'd probably be so fukken pumped I'd get off in five.
>> Anonymous
>>532808
i don't know, blondy did blow her first, so it'd be mostly off, and last time i fingered a girl i had a paper cut between my fingers. shit stung like a mother fucker. so maybe vagina juice already acidic?
>> Anonymous
>>532193
this thread is fucking awesome, actually
>> Anonymous
Same thing happened to me, but I tried to lube up the melon with shampoo... im dumb as hell
>> Anonymous
>>532818
Vaginas are slightly acidic. Ironically, they're rather hostile places for sperm.
>> Anonymous
STOP POSTING THIS
>> Anonymous
>>532268

grapefruit = too small, for me at least.

Woot.
>> Anonymous
>>532839

Only the strong survive.
>> Anonymous
so, anyone have the TRANSLATED version?

*and willing to post it, plz*
>> Anonymous
>>532174
whatever happened to poking apple pies?
>> Anonymous
>>532190
tnx
>> Anonymous
YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO CANTELOPE GENIUS
>> Anonymous
>>532808
>The sugar from the fruit should burn like hell in blondies vagoo.
ENJOY THE YEAST INFECTION!
Sugary stuff should never ever be put into a vagina unless you want to make her suffer.
>> Anonymous
>>532886
http://rapidshare.com/files/46893220/Semen_Sprinkler_J__English_.zip
>> Anonymous
I came
>> Anonymous
What was the source site of the artist?
>> Quote !Curly7Wya.
D:
>> Anonymous
>>532926

http://sammohung.blog83.fc2.com/
>> Anonymous
>>532832
I would guess that dense coconut milk or whipped cream would work a bit better. Or butter, but that might be a bit hard to spread through it.
>> Anonymous
Try a peach. Remove the pit first!
>> Anonymous
>>533037
To small and acidic?
>> Anonymous
You guys are too much!! I delcare this an epic thread.
>> Anonymous
>>532174

I feel terribly sorry for anyone who can't get off in under 10 minutes. 9 years of this shit and I can get off virtually at will.

...but more to the point, you can easily gain a half hour by appropriately preparing the melon.

1- Make the "opening" in the melon, the full length of your penis, but only half the diameter.

2- Place the melon in thte freezer with the opening facing down.

This step is basically what rids the "burning sensation from the melon. Since the melon will freeze from the outside-inward, the water along the shell freezes, forcing the sugars and undiluted acids towards the center where you made the opening. Freezing takes foughly 2 hours depending on the size of the melon and temperature of the freezer.

3- T opening should now be lined with crystaline sugars. Now cut the opening to full penis diameter, and scrape out any surfaced residue.

4- Enjoy your fuck!

I expect to hear your stories of experience in the days to come!
>> Anonymous
i declare this a discussion thread!
>> Anonymous
>>533074

Huh, cooling the melon?

most of the time its warming up the melon. Is there a difference?
>> Anonymous
>>533086

You beet your melon ther is!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enzymatic_browning

I'll bet $50... no $100 that this is the cause of the burn. You are probably experiencing this reaction on your mucosal membranes (i.e. urethra).

You need to negate the enzyme which cause the browning effect in one of two ways; blanching or removing. Blanching or essentially boiling has three major drawbacks. 1, heating the melon this much causes a large amount of decay within the meat of the melon. I'm sure you've seen the gif of a microwaved watermelon, yeah, it's not pretty. 2, since melons, especially watermelons are mostly liquid, the melon will retain heat, making for an unpleasant fuck. 3rdly, bringing water to a boil is too much damn work over freezing the melon.

Additionally, a frozen melon provides an exhilerating plunge if you can remove the residue fast enough.
>> Anonymous
1000 points of win for this thread
>> Anonymous
I have never done any fruit but I find this thread fascinating. I once saw a video of a woman doing a potato. She carved it into a penis first then had fun with it. Of course the standard produce for women to use is a cucumber. I don't know about the chemical composition of them but I think those huge Japanese radishes would offer the best size customization choice, you could carve it to whatever size you want.

Incidentally, the Cucumber is technically a melon.
>> Anonymous
awesome thread
>> Anonymous
>>533137

An english cucumber is best. They're in season now too.
>> Iris !tFj8DP0Frs
>>533137
So I DO fuck melons...
>> Anonymous
There has been lots of advice on how a man should fuck a fruit how about some advice on how a woman should bang a vegetable!
>> Anonymous
I just love how every single time this discussion comes up it grows into this uncontrolled mass of melonn-fucking advise and how women can do the equivalent with such and such.

what the fuck. fruits hold no passion, we must hoist the flag of flesh fucking instead - the hand
>> Anonymous
>>532190
anyone have a non rapidshit version of melonfuck eng?
>> Anonymous
YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!
I had been looking all over for this H-manga and noone knew about it, even though I knew it was posted on here all the time. Thank you!
>> Kt
I am using the machine translation.
Therefore, the mistranslation occurs.
What everybody says might been misunderstood.

Hello it is an author of this manga.
It came to offer a thing that was cheaper and more wonderful than the
melon today.

Prepared thing.

1.Glass with depth of your cock. A paper cup and a plastic glass, etc.
should be light. Thing that is heatproof

2.Potato starch.
The one to harden it.

3.Microwave oven.
The one to heat it.

How to make.
Potato starch is put up to about 40% of the capacity of the prepared cup. (Because stiffness is changed depending on the put amount, trying several times might be good. )

Water is put in up to about 90 percent of the cup, and potato starch
is often melted.
It is heated with the microwave oven.
Until often hardening.

It punctures it with the stick etc. during hot when hardening.
It is good in the hole like the little finger.
(Are you though uses chopsticks in Japan?)

Then, it waits for 20 minutes or 30 minutes until cooling.
"Never use it during hot. "
"Your cock becomes a hot dog. "

When becoming it at a good temperature. The preparation is completed by this.

Cock is only inserted now.
let's play!good luck!

It might be good to use water and a loose starch for the lubricant.
>> Anonymous
"Your cock becomes a hot dog. "

HAHAHAHAH
>> Anonymous
weeaboo post time!

??????????????????????

??????????????????????????????????
??????

????????????

??????
>> C h a n
I go back to my beloved 4chan and what greets my eye?

THIS

Jesus Christ, let it GO. IT'S DEAD. ALL THE MELONS IN THE WORLD ARE DEAD, ROTTEN, and filled with semen already. THERE IS NO MORE

public announcement brought to you by a failed furry :)
>> Anonymous
>>533233

>>533231here.

you fail for not reading thread. gb2 fur7cutionchan.
>> Kt
???????????
??????????????????????????????????
???
???????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????

??????????????????

??????????????
?????????????????
???????blog??????????
?????????????????
>> Anonymous
>>533202
excellent recipe
>> Anonymous
I did it. It was good, but it wasn't worth it. I probably did it wrong, and I'll be trying again later.
>> Kt
??????????????????????????????????
?????????????????
????????????????
??????????????
>> Anonymous
>>533246

?????????

???????????…??????????????????????
????????????

??????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????…?????
????????
>> Anonymous
>>533249

??????????????????????????????????
??????????
>> Kt
>>533263

????????????????
??????

??????????????????????????????

??????????????????????????????????
????????????X?????????????????????
??????????
???????
?????????????
>> Anonymous
And on that note, time to sleep.

??????…????
>> Anonymous
>>533272

????????

????????????????????????????????

????????????????????

???????????????

Hay guys, some words from the author before I sleep.

"1. Are you seriously telling me there are actually people who shoved their dicks into melons?

2. If so, it is my responsibility as the author to tell you to stop, as there are better things to try." (And here he mentions a name, ??X, which I'm not sure of... I assume of some sort of Japanese plant?)
>> C h a n
     File :-(, x)
>>533296
like this?
>> oro
so much win contained in one thread... I did not think it possible.

what ~exactly~ is this potato starch he's talking about in the recipe? o_oa
>> Anonymous
All of you GET THE FUCK OUT. Just because you cannot score with a lady(or man, for you stupid whores out there). Is no reason to ruin a perfectly good piece of fruit. Congrats losers(and stupid whores), you all fail at life.
>> oro
goddamn hypervegan fruit activists!

GTFO!
>> Anonymous
>>533330
No u.
>> Anonymous
Infact, I think I'll sage!
>> SAGE SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGE
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
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>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE
>> Anonymous
FYI "sage" when used correctly is the method to post in a thread without bumping it to the front of the forum
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGE>
>533358SAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESAGESA
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>> Anonymous
>>533329

I'm guessing you've got premature ejaculation problems and when the OP suggested that some people don't come for 20 minutes or so it broke your bitter little heart. I lol at your pain.
>> C h a n
>>533361
that reply also works for the replies right above yours
>> Anonymous
>>533361
In turn, I am loling at your sad little attempt to sound witty and funny. come back when you can bring better lulz. Enjoy exile homo.
>> Anonymous
>>533364
Wow, aren't we the witty, but bitter little 4chan whore. Gtfo.
>> Anonymous
>>533368

"Ahhh ... that was the best 15 seconds of my life."
>> Anonymous
>>533369
Another failed lulz. Keep trying, unless that is the best your brain cells can muster?
>> Anonymous
>>533369
No wait, here, I'll give you more inspiration!
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> SAGE !IF.eWYXJT.
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
If any of you are atually doing this I wish you a a quick lonely death

fucking wapanese
>> Anonymous
>>533327

http://www.theasiancookshop.co.uk/index.asp?function=DISPLAYPRODUCT&productid=769

This is potato starch. It's basically like cornstarch or flour, but made from potatoes, and has a higher tolerance for heat, quite common in Asian cookery. Try Asian supermarkets or mail order, just look for it on Google. Cornstarch or flour may also work, but then again it might not.

I tried fucking a Galia melon yesterday, it's a relative of the cantaloupe and my local supermarket had them on buy one, get one free.

It didn't work too well, the seeds all came out so I was just rubbing my shaft against the flesh while the glans was just waving around in the gap inside. It was still pretty hot, though. perhaps a seedless melon or watermelon would work better? Perhaps a thick bodied cucumber would work, too?

Also, thank you to the author for writing this and for gracing our humble thread with his presence. Do you have any plans to make this manga available outside of Japan?

I'll try the potato starch recipe, and see if there are appropriate substitutes for potato starch, which is quite hard to find here in Britain. I'll try my local Asian supermarket soon. Yes, we are fucking melons because of you, and we thank you for it.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
>> Anonymous
>>533296

Googling "??X" brings up some links to post about the glass recipe. After Babelfishing, they seem to talk about "one chestnut powder X", so perhaps that's the name of a brand of potato starch?