File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
so did anyone ever find this?
>> Anonymous
Seriously, GTFO.

This shit isn't funny anymore.
>> Anonymous
>>451568
what?

i never even come to this board, i found the pic and a few pages on /b/ like amonth ago
i was wondering if you had it
>> Anonymous
Well /d/, I tried it.

Not finding the comic, melon fuck.

At first, it was great. It was hot, and slick, and wow. But it rapidly cooled, and positioning was hard. For all the prep time and the 3 dollars, it didn't get me off. I tried a long time, that's for sure.

Finally I gave up and went back to the fleshlight. There turned out to be an upside to the melonfuck, it seemed to have had an overstimulation effect, and I spent record time with that.

So, apparently you'll last a lot longer after melon fuck, but you won't get off, and it's kinda akward to do.

Holy Grail over. :(
>> Anonymous
No, nobody ever found it because it doesn't exist. There are only the three succulent pages, and there will probably never BE more than the three pages. It's not funny. Stop it. Seriously. This is the third thread I've seen TODAY asking about it. Today of course being the Sunday of my local time, which I'm still counting it as despite the fact that it's 1:40 Monday morning. NONETHELESS, it's not funny. It's not fun. It doesn't exist. Stop. Fucking. Asking. Please.
>> Anonymous
>>451577
wow SORRY
i had no idea it was even still a subject of conversation
>> Anonymous
>>451571
dunno if that's copypasta, but they say microwaving the melon for a short time will keep it warm for a considerable amount of time, perfect for dumping a load or two of baby batter into
>> Chao !!eFZ1anCCqZ2
>>451571

You have to do the following:
1. small hole, of course.
2. clear out as many of the seeds as you can through the hole. They feel kinda weird, otherwise. Maybe that's your thing and you can leave em in... whatever.
3. Fill what you can with some baby oil. Not too much or you'll have a mess on your hands, but enough so that you have some warm stuff afloat in there.
4. Microwave to warm it all up a bit. Note: WARM. Careful not to microwave it too long and burn your dick.
5. Insert and enjoy. As it cools on the inside, if you did it right, there will be a distinct suction feeling.

I did this once when I was 14 (so 5 years ago) after reading some tip on some old Web 1.0 masturbation-technique site. It felt like the craziest thing I've... ever... o_O. Afterwards I hid the evidence by throwing the melon over a wall behind my house.
>> Anonymous
>>451594
shoulda made a smoothie
>> Chao !!eFZ1anCCqZ2
Don't give the rest of /d/ too many ideas.
>> Anonymous
>>451594

One day several years ago, I was in my back yard and a melon went sailing over the fence.
>> Anonymous
>>451606
omg you gave me that melon and i ate it!
>> Anonymous
I tried this once on a Cantaloupe, as I pushed in I realized I forgot to take out the seeds and one pushed into my uretha. It hurt like a bitch but I was able to pee it out. Later when the seeds were cleared the soft outer layer of the seed felt awesome. Every since I was fucking a melon atleast once or twice a week. Only one thing is better than melon fucking is vacuum fucking god that thing is light years better than a hooker going down on you.
>> Anonymous
>>451611
Until you get stuck.
>> Anonymous
>>451615

Well only one way to get out of that situation...
>> Anonymous
>>451611
Vacuum fucking? o.O
>> Anonymous
I tried that once with a pineapple, and it was HOLY FUCK THE SPIKES OH MY GOD
>> Anonymous
WARNING

DO NOT ATTEMPT WITH GRAPEFRUIT

T_T
>> Anonymous
Hey.. Can you make the vacuum fuck this cake?

Baanananananna
>> Anonymous
I just tried this with a honeydew. My dick is bleeding in 2 spots now.
>> Anonymous
>>451633

hahahahhahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHA Hasdfsdkfsdkj
>> Anonymous
What's the right melon for melonfuck?

How would I remove the seeds without fuxx0ring up the hole?

Is microwaving a fruit REALLY a good idea?

Is it worth the risk of urethra damage due to a tragic seed misplacement? *Shudders*

Seriously, answer. I'm totally maybe kinda considering fucking a melon.
>> Anonymous
>>451677
here's the good news for you: the melon won't say no
>> c h a n
>>451677
meet
>>451633
>> Anonymous
>>451594
Yeah, I did all that, used good lube too, KY warming liquid.

It just didn't do it.

You know, I think it's the same problem I have with blowjobs. The only time oral ever worked was a girl who could deep throat me consistently. Otherwise, it's just not enough stimulation. I think the melon falls under the same category, no squeeze, no real pressure.
>> Anonymous
hahaha oh wow
only on 4chan i'll here about this shit
>> Anonymous
This thread has gone from ultimate failure to pretty goddamned hilarious. Thank you, all of you, for reaffirming a small part of my faith in humanity.
>> Anonymous
>>451711
Well, I'd meant to make a thread since wednesday night when I tried it.

I was just too lazy, and saw this one pop up.
>> Anonymous
next thread in this series : melon anal sex, sticking a honeydew up your rump
>> Anonymous
>>451624
Okay, let's hear it!
>> Anonymous
>>451624

epic.
>> Robin Sure
Has anybody the page that the bloke drew to go after this?
>> Anonymous
I new I wasn't the only person who wanted to do it after reading this... from the responses, I'm happy I didn't.
thank you /d/.
>> Anonymous
Hahahaha, imagine true humour turning up on /d/ xD