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Anonymous
An adolescent opossum used to come into my garage and eat my cat's food.
I didn't mind the first few times, but my cat was beginning to hunger, so I caught the little bastard by the tail one night, stuffed it in a box, and drove it out about 10 miles, to a peacock park, and let it loose.
THAT MOTHERFUCKER WAS BACK A WEEK LATER. Instead of driving it away again, I took it by the tail and slammed the piece of shit as hard as I could into the asphault of the street. It hobbled off, and never came back.
The other night, I went to toss my garbage, and a raccoon scurried out of the bin alley, followed by a squirrel and another possum. WHAT IS THIS SHIT, OVER THE HEDGE?
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