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Anonymous
Dearest /an/, I have a problem I must place in your capable hands.

My mother's dog, Kirby, is nearly 4 years old. He is a purebred/puppy mill Bichon Frise and he is the nastiest little brat I have ever met.

We have an older dog, Tazz, a German Shepherd/Husky mutt who is nearly 8. We got him from a shelter and he came to us nearly fully trained.

Kirby never received training. My mother is pretty busy and decided at some point while I was away at college that training her little rat wasn't worth the effort and because his turds are small enough to be picked up from the floor and his piss is easy enough to wipe off everything in the house.

He has nipped at delivery men, snaps at anyone who tries to pick him up from someone else's lap, and pees and shits all over the house even though we have a doggy door and have seen him use it. He chooses instead to do his business in the house.

My mother makes excuses and says that it doesn't bother her. She even refused to replace the linens that her dog ruined when he evacuated in my bed. She has given me permission to train said sorry excuse for a dog, but says that she will not change her behavior with the dog (ie: the dog will still sleep in her bed and spend half his life in her lap and she will still clean up his messes).

Does /an/ have any ideas about what I can do? In b4 sit on him, give him away, etc. because my mom loves the little shit too much.

Pic related, as it is the little shit himself.
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>> Anonymous
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<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

that or people need to stop spoiling their 'puppy' so much. but doesn't sound like mom is willing to fix her behavior...
>> Anonymous
Kill both the dog and your mother.

It is the only solution.
>> Anonymous
There is no way to fix this if the main keeper of the dog (your mother) refuses to help. You could train the dog to do backflips and curb himself with a garbage bag, but as soon as you give the dog back to your mother it will go right back to shitting all over the house.

When it comes to dog training, either everyone in the house needs to be dedicated to it, or nothing will ever change.
>> The Archaeologist !!PNcLmJSf/RY
Confront her, and get in a shouting match if you have to. Show her you mean business, and your tired of her disrespecting you and this house by allowing that fucking animal to desecrate it. It's unruly and it's behavior is unbecoming for a dog, and here in the fucking civilized world there are rules that your expected to follow when you have an animal. Ie that it's not retarded, won't attack people, is generally kind and won't scare kids or fuck with delivery men, and doesn't shit all over the world.

Put the bitch in her place.
>> Anonymous
>>182367

Had that shouting match many times, usually after the little fucker pees on my bed. She says that if I hate it that much I should just move out. (I'm 22, on leave of absence from school and living with my parents to save up for the last year of college I can't afford)
>> Anonymous
Electric pee pad.
>> Kike Sagura
Chocolate.

-Kike Sagura
>> Anonymous
shoot it
>> Anonymous
just take it out for a "walk" to the "lake" and magically lose it.
>> Anonymous
Another vote for poisoning it.
>> AGirlOnTheNet !VuRBSuhcsw
So get a job, move out, and never have to deal with the mutt again.
>> Anonymous
pee on your moms bed daily. say you'll stop when the dog does.
>> Anonymous
get her a cuter puppy that doesn't act like a total shit head. Maybe when she can see the difference she'll get that dog trained.
>> Anonymous
>>182362
>>182376
>>182411
>>182441
Another vote here for killing it
>> Anonymous
i fucking hate small dogs
waste of life, fucking punt it off a cliff
>> Anonymous
i vote that you poison it, shoot it, then for it's funeral, punt it off of a cliff. film it's fall, then rapidshit and poast.
>> Anonymous
>>182448
You get my vote!
>> Anonymous
>>182448

I third this, because it is hilarious.
>> Anonymous
ahhh kill it please!
I hate these little spoiled disgusting dogs!
>> Anonymous
Castrating him will reduce his aggressiveness, but it sounds as he is not to blame. Your mom is to blame- she gave him shitty education and she let's him rule the house and be the leader- that's why he pees everywhere and allowes himself to bite.
I would've reccomanded training him with a professional dog trainer, but since your mom won't change her additude towards him it's useless.

Sorry your mom's dog is an idiot.
>> Anonymous
>>182448
Fourth'd. Awesome.
>> Anonymous
>>182448
>>182516
I vote for both these options.
theres no way in hell its going to change what with your mother being a retarded twat, so either beat the shit out of it to make sure it knows you're in charge, kill it, beat your mother with it, or start dumping all its shit on her bed. Possibly as well as your own.

That cunt deserves nothing less.
>> Anonymous
My parents do the same thing with our dog. Fortunatly, ours isn't snippy and annoying, he's just a big untrained goof. There's really nothing you can do unless your mom is willing to do her part. You have my sympathy.

>>182448is a good idea, though.
>> Anonymous
>>182448
The only way to show you mean business besides killing the dog
>> Anonymous
Take him out for a walk. Get his collar off. Let him go.

Tell your mom that he broke free of the collar and bolted.
>> Anonymous
Pick it up and throw it every time it evacuates in the house. Don't kick it though, that's cruel.
>> Anonymous
I'll tell you how we deal with this kind of problem in Texas: The 3 S's.

Shoot.
Shovel.
Shut up.
>> Anonymous
one of my roommates has a friend who peed on someone else's bed and managed to make the "someone else" think it was himself after getting shitfaced. So, for revenge, pee on her bed and blame it on the dog, lol. Human pee can probably potentially smell much worse. :3

But for serious advice...

Talk to her rationally instead of shouting and see if it works. Explain your situation (also include why you can't move out and so why the dog's behavior bothers you). Ask how her neighbors and friends respond when they come in. Tell her they probably think she's nuts for spoiling the thing so.

You might also want to consider that your mom's depressed or that somethings wrong with her mentally. Most people aren't going to ever want anything that does that kind of shit around the house, and to put up with it either requires a great deal of love (ie: for a sick pet you've had for 10 years) or a lack of willingness to care about anything at all anymore. Ask yourself if there are other things she's doing strangely or abnormally. If so, you may want to discuss THAT with her instead (and see if, a year down the line, the dogs behavior changes)... or just understand that somethings wrong with her and therefore you can't do anything about the dog.
>> tigerfeather !CrwtTbFNxQ
I agree with>>182448.

Also, whenever the dog does anything in your room or on your bed, move it into your mom's room. Spoiled little shit dog. Oh, did you know that you can get the dog quarantined and/or destroyed if it bites you (in most states)?

Your mom sounds crazy.
>> Anonymous
Your Mom.
My shrink.
NAO
>> Anonymous
>>182448

Do it. Now. DO IT, OP.
>> NeoAthena !akg3y6
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Update:

I've tried speaking to my mother about it again, telling her your confirmation that I can't train him without her support. She simply will not discuss the topic farther than to say that i need to find a way around it, if only to train him so that he sees me as his alpha so that I'm the only one he listens to.

I know that she feels guilty about how poorly behaved her little shit is. In moments of weakness she has admitted that she didn't expect to go back to work while she had him (was a stay-at-home Mom when she got him) and has considered giving him up because she knows he needs more attention from her (and that I hate the dog so won't give him any attention in her place)

tl;dr: help me get around her and make her dog my willing slave.

Pic related, as it is our other, infinitely more awesome dog
>> Anonymous
The smaller dogs are always the worst, here's my solution.

1.Take a knife
2.Stab it until it stops breathing
3.????
4.Profit
>> Anonymous
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My dog chases little asian boys, He hates kids, and he barks at nothing.

You hit them, when they shit on something hit them and say no.
>> Anonymous
>>183123
Is that hideous obese guy/hiedeous obese female dyke you, OP?
>> Anonymous
>>183230
OP:
Why yes, it is me? You have a PROBLEM with me?
>> Anonymous
>>183274
lol ignore anonfags, anon. I think you're really cute.

>>183210

NEVER hit a dog trying to educate it. Violence is not a way to teach dogs.
>> Anonymous
Buy a bar of dark chocolate, feed it to the rat bastard, profit.
>> Anonymous
Misplaced rat poison. Just don't let your own dog get in to it.
>> Anon
>>182448
I vote for this.

I think this is why little dogs get such a bad rap. Dumbasses like this tolerate their stupidity because they're small. Then you get little bastards like this. Big dog would be in the pound or shot.
I'm in something of the same boat. Dog has high aggression, which seems to be more common in small dogs than in big dogs. My mom's 'designer dog shorkie' is about the same as Bichon. He attacks me every chance he gets. Well anything really.
Have my Pom (he's not the typical little dog, or he'd be dead already...) trained, house broken, etc. Tried the same thing on Ben, the little bastard is too stupid/stubborn/aggressive to do anything with.
If you go to the forums on dog.com..they'll straight up tell you unless the 'mom' starts to change the dog isn't going to change at all. I asked. They told me to put the dog down.
Mom has been established dominant and unless you unseat her...(in wolf speak that means kick her ass out of the pack) she's going to be alpha. He's going to look to her more than you, even if you establish dominance over him. And even then, he's going to constantly test you. Probably why he pisses on your bed.
In my case, releasing the little bastard does nothing, he won't run off. He won't eat chocolate, rat poison, what else have I set before him.....
Seeing as the little bastard went for a cop's balls, I was so hoping he'd shoot him.

Give your mom the guilt trip. It's her fault he's so fucked up. She neglected him. She didn't set his limits. Now he needs to go somewhere where he can be set right. Taught his place, and conditioned to live in a proper household. She continues to keep him, he'll continue to be insecure and mentally unstable.
>> Anonymous
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Hire Cesar Millan!!! TSST!!! Ever notice it's almost always white people who have trouble with their dogs...?

>>183423
Good points....
>> Anonymous
>>183630
well, if you see how most white/white-washed parents "discipline" their kids, you wouldn't be surprised.

GO TO YOUR ROOM FILLED WITH INTERNET, TV, A PHONE, A FRIDGE, A BED, A STEREO, AND VARIOUS OTHER AMUSING DEVICES AS A FORM OF PUNISHMENT! YOU MAY ONLY COME DOWN ONCE WE DEIGN TO FEED YOU WITH FOOD WE NOT ONLY PROCURED BUT ALSO PREPARED TO YOUR LIKING!
>> Anonymous
>>183123

Judging by this, I suggest you kills the dog, and yourself.
>> Fulgrim
Borrow my rifle, impale the dog on the bayonet, and then shoot it. Five times. If it falls off the bayonet, stab it again and shoot until the magazine is empty.