File :-(, x, )
Anonymous
I'm a 25-year-old male. I'm a zoophile and always have been. I'm a longtime reader (I'm sure you're thrilled), so I know my interests aren't on your approved list of sexual activities. Not trying to argue that point. However, it's clear what turns my head when I walk down the street, and it's never the person holding the leash. I know from your column and many other sources that once your brain is "wired" a certain way, "rewiring" it is unlikely (snowball's chance in hell), so this isn't going to go away. My question is, what do I do?

Currently, I don't date. I was married once, briefly, never had sex, marriage quickly annulled. I currently have no sexual attraction to any human, male or female, so I don't feel the need to date. Also, sharing this information with anyone I attempted to date would probably end in horror, tears, and my needing to move out of state. However, a lifetime without a relationship (two-legged or four-legged) seems unappealing. Here are the options I see:

1) Get a shrink (who I can talk to about this) and a girlfriend or boyfriend (who I can't talk to about it) and, in terms of the sex, master giving head, since my dick won't want to join the party.

2) Buy a house with a big yard and… well, you know.

I don't care if you ridicule me. I'd just like another opinion. I mean, honestly, who else would answer this anonymously and I actually have some faith in his judgment?
>> Gunlord !.YMO7aNBcQ
kill yourself?

okay, if not that, go see a shrink or something. a lot of mental disorders can be alleviated with drugs--severe depression with prozac, for instance. I dunno anything about zoophilia, but maybe it's something wrong with hormones or various chemicals related to sex in your brain, and a shrink might be able to prescribe you something to alleviate your issues. just a thought
>> Anonymous
find a cosplaying girlfriend and get her to wear cat ears?

I am stumped.. your situation seems tough.
You do need someone to talk to about this though and it's up to you whether you pay someone to listen or search for like-minded (or open-minded) individuals to befriend.
>> Anonymous
im sure there are zoophile forums online, find a girl who shares your passion?
>> Anonymous
just become a furry like the rest of them.
>> Anonymous
*Hug*
I'm almost crying ._.
>> Anonymous
I bet she'll be ugly (though you probably are too so no prob there), but I bet you can find a chick who wants nothing more than to pleasure dogs with you. If I wasn't at work I bet I could find you several animal fucker forums to hang out at and meet people. With that said, you should certainly seek psychiatric help for your disorder, it's against the laws of God and Man, and also the damn dog DOES NOT want you to fuck it dispite what you may think.
>> Anonymous
In short… my advice… which is really going to annoy Mike "Man and Animal" Huckabee… is… um… to buy that big house, RUFF, one with a nice, big yard… and do what you gotta do. Inside, please, shades drawn.

Bestiality is wrong, wrong, wrong, because an animal cannot give its consent. But… uh… anyone who's ever actually owned a boy dog knows that most would be only too delighted to… um… well, you know.

I'm assuming that you want to be fucked by dogs, of course, as that's almost always the case with dudes into dogs. Man-on-dog is a whole lot wronger than dog-on-man, if I may use a certain former senator's formulation, most importantly for reasons of safety for the animal, so I don't smile on man-on-dog. (Actually, I don't smile on the dog-on-man, either—it's more like "grimace, cover eyes, look away," but, hey, that's the reaction I have to cunnilingus.) Take a torn-up girl dog to the vet, RUFF, and you're going to wind up talking with the police and having to cross a PETA picket line to get back into your house—and it'll serve you right.

For the record, I'm con bestiality (and very much pro cunnilingus). I think fucking dogs is wrong, wrong, wrong. But I had pork and beef and chicken at dinner last night—all 100 percent factory-farmed meat, derived from animals that were cruelly tortured every second of their brief and miserable existence—and my particular strain of Tourette's syndrome commands me to say this: If I were an animal, I'd much rather be screwed than stewed. We murder animals for their flesh, skins, fur, and just for the fuck of it. Those of us that eat meat; wear fur; run around in leather pants, jackets, shoes, restraints, etc.; and kill animals for sport don't have much moral authority when it comes time to lecture those of you who wanna smooch the pooch.

Finally, RUFF, build a nice, tall fence around that yard, okay? And seeing a shrink probably won't make you wanna screw humans, but hey, it couldn't hurt.
>> Anonymous
Paraphilias can't be cured but apparently they can be helped. Ask a competent shrink.

Also, find an asexual partner. She/he won't mind at all that you don't want to have sex with you, in fact it's likely she/he will be thrilled to find a companion with no interest in hanky panky with them.
>> Anonymous
You all got trolled..this is obviously a copypasta from a Savage Love column by Dan Savage.
" I know from your column..."
>> Anonymous
OOH OOH I HAVE AN IDEA.

HOW ABOUT YOU WRITE THAT SAVAGE LOVE GUY.
>> Anonymous
>>204062
actually, i'm a female who is also a zoophile. :D just go on beastforum, you'll probably find a female or male on there that'd be interested.
>> Anonymous
>>204107

i also recommend seeing a shrink if you truly feel it'd help, if you don't then don't

all i hope is that you're bending over for the dog...otherwise, it could kill your pooch.
>> Anonymous
Stop abusing animals. Also kill yourself.
>> Anonymous
Just buy a real big dog and a jar of peanut butter.

EMBRACE YOUR REAL SELF :)
>> Anonymous
Ah i guess I know what you should try.
Find a girl on some furry community, let her wear some spcial animal costume etc..
One of my friends with similar problem did so and it helped! At least it is worth trying I think.
>> Anonymous
1. Save up money, get life savings.
2. Buy antique revolver. A Colt, for irony.
3. Prepare gun.
4. Jump out of fifth story window.
5. ???? (we all know what happens here)
6. Profit!
>> Anonymous
>>204231
Furry != Beastiality, but unfortunately they don't seem to help suggest otherwise so carry on then.
>> Anonymous
     File :-(, x)
hey there just in case you did not already know :3
>> Anonymous
>>204078
what the fuck does RUFF mean?
>> Anonymous
>>204062
good job troll
>> Anonymous
Having sex with animals is illegal in Washington.
>> Anonymous
>>204274
it means you got trolled dumb fuck, the post with RUFF in it is the actual columnists response, RUFF is the acronym of the stupid name that the guy wrote in with...probably Really Ugly Fur Fucker or something
>> Nodbody
Here is a Forum for People like you www.Beastforum.com you may find someone there