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Anonymous
Ferret owner chiming in:
When you first wake them up for playtime, keep them in the cage for a few minutes, usually they shit very soon after waking up.
Now, go to the pet store and buy a large bottle of either Nature's Miracle or Simple Solution. These are natural enzyme cleaners that break down poo/pee odor. Treat the areas where you don't want to the ferrets to shit at least once or twice. Now pick the spots (you'll never get them to just use ONE spot) you want them to poop and put a litter box there, or a 1" think pile of news paper, and put a bit of poop on it so they get the idea. When they back up to shit, give them a lick of a treat (ferretone or somethin') AS they're shitting and pretty soon they should learn what to do.
As for the tearing apart the furniture, well some furnishing are just not ferret-compatable. Mine did the same thing to an old mattress. Your best bet is to buy furniture that feels solid... like there's no hollow area behind the cloth for them to dig into. Spraying the areas with Bitter Apple or Phooey works with some ferrets too.
It also sounds like they're bored. You need to give them toys, or "enrichment", including stuff to dig in. You can take a paper bag, fill it with plastic bags, and toss a few treats in the bottom for a cheap toy. Gather some bags and boxes, fill them with safe stuff for the ferrets to explore, like crumpled balls of news paper, balled-up worn-out socks, etc. Take the time to make 6 or so of these enrichment items, and give 2 of them to your ferrets each play time. They usually find shallow pans of water pretty interesting too. (of course "interesting" to a ferret means they'll spend 4-5 minutes with it before getting bored)
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