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Need Anal Entry Advice (dog) Anonymous
So last night I was bored and horny, with my dog watching me fap. He's a medium-large size breed about 60-70 pounds. I took one look at his brown spot and knew what I wanted to do - Stick it in the pooper of course.

After several failed attempts at entry just using phlegmy spit as lube I finally broke out the Crisco Vegetable Oil(since I hear it's what all the fags use.) Two more attempts with the oil and I gained entry.

At first it didn't feel like much. Just felt like a rubber band around my dick. As I penetrated further he started to wince. I consoled him as best I could and paused inside him so that he could eat a treat (which I had at the ready for just such an occurrence.) I kept going further in until I hit a point where I couldn't go any further.

He was still whimpering a little every time I thrust in, but soon I found a small range of motion that didn't seem to bother him and felt good for me as well.
>> Anonymous
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However, due to our size differences and my lack of physical prowess I couldn't maintain the necessary squat position long enough to come. I give him another treat and let him lick my balls as I finish myself off, then I jack him off til he comes as well.

I tried the same tonight and gained entry pretty quickly. He even seemed eager for me to enter, lifting his tail up as soon as he saw my erection. Even spinning away from me as if he knew and wanted it to happen, and I know he wanted it too. Again, the same result as last night.

So my questions to you, /an/, are several. What type of lubricant works best and won't bother my dog's colon? How should I manage the size issue (I've tried laying him on his side, I think tomorrow I'll try to have him sit on my cock)? How long does it usually take for a male dog to "loosen up"? I'm slightly above average in size, but I've also seen goatse so I know assholes are pliable. Are there any calming substances or pain relieving substances I can use so that I can feel better about it not hurting him at first until he gets looser?

Thanks for your help /an/.